Traveling

I used to love to travel. I've had anxiety issues (and diagnoses) all my life and have fought back against the fear of being away from home forever.  Over the past couple of years, however, my world has been getting smaller and smaller. I no longer fly.  I can't drive long distances alone or stay alone when I get there.  I hate this.  I'm so frustrated and angry and ashamed.  I'm afraid of everything - doctors, dentists, heights - you name it.

I have a trip coming up which everyone else in their right minds would be so excited about and looking forward to.  I'll be driving to LA (about 8 hours) with a friend and going on a cruise to the Mexican Riviera - a trip I've taken several times before.  But, here I am, less than a week before the trip waking up in a panic at 4 AM, fearful and freaked out.

Just needed to vent.  Please respond if you can...thanks.

[MrGreen]

Well I would look at what you once loved to do. And look at where you are today. That alone would give me the determination to want to want to fight back. To get back that life I once had. But you have gave up on so much. The big question is how much can you handle all at one time now? We mention baby stepping a lot on this forum. Slowly taking steps to getting back to where we once were. If we try too much too quickly we might have a harder fall. But we have to try and help you plan for your trip. And it is not something we have time to baby step our way into. Unless you are willing to go out over the next week and face up to a lot of fears. But instead of running from them, staying put and seeing that the feelings you dread the most, no matter how bad they are, do pass, as easily as they have come on. That is something that is important to note. All those horrible feelings do pass. But also take a look at the connections between you mood, the feelings you feel, your thoughts and the likes. See they are all connected. Next time your mood is low, write down the thought you had in your head at that second. How you reacted to the thought. What symptoms it brought on. One just leads directly to the next. So if you can learn how to change the thought or the reaction, the symptoms and the mood will also change.

Your fears are all normal for an anxiety sufferer. We have all being there ourselves. We go look for more fears if nothing is bothering us. Because we think there must be something wrong if we are feeling fine. Bit of a catch 22 situation. Not sure if you are on medication or not. May have a fear of that too. But for the trip it may help. I would also try as many forms of distraction as possible. MP3 player. Digital camera. You name it. I would use it to get me though. Listen to music. Take pictures. Anything to take my mind off of myself. It is only when we start to think inwardly that our problems really kick in.

But try and not think too far ahead for now. We don't need you adding more stress to your situation in advance of the trip. Maybe try a few exercises out. Going to local places. Sticking it out for as long as possible. Nobody has ever died from anxiety. It may bring on horrible feelings. But the more we see that they can pass the braver we get and allow them to hit us. The body adjusts to the newer feelings. With each try it gets easier and easier.

Keep is posted on your situation. We are always here to help if we can.

[sierrasong]

Thanks so much for your kind response, Mr Green.  I can get around locally just fine (thank goodness!) it's the longer distances that are the problem.  And you are so right about taking the mind off of "self".  That's how I cope, usually.  By keeping busy and focusing on other things.    Thanks for reminding me of these things!

[MrGreen]

Just hope you can have a good time away and enjoy yourself. You deserve it.