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Should I stay or should I go?
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This patient support community is for loved ones of people who drink and are trying to quit for discussions relating to abuse, behavioral issues, caring for yourself, counseling, divorce and separation, enabling, guilt, and when to get medical help.

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Should I stay or should I go?

I've been with my boyfriend for almost 14 years and he is an alchoholic. He has been drinking Gin since the day we met and at first things were good because I was drinking with him but soon it got to the point where I couldn't do it anymore because I could feel that I was killing myself so I stopped drinking gin and just drank beer but not every day like him. Fast forward...about a year and a half ago he stopped on his own for about six months and was doing well until he went to his mom's house the day before Thanksgiving and had a drink and he hasn't stopped since. He has become extremely insecure and jealous and thinks that I'm cheating on him but I'm not and he's just driving me crazy because he is drinking himself to death...literally and I don't know what to do about it. he is the love of my life and it is killing me to see him go through this but I'm so unhappy and I feel that if I let him go I've just thrown away almost 14 years of my life...Please Help.
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4228027_tn?1360084803
Please love yourself enough to leave him he isnt good for you trust me ive been there... its no joke when someine u r close to has a addiction like that.. help your self you cant change him or make him change he has to stop drinking his self and   want it.. leave before it gets worse hun
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Thank you for replying and I know you're right and that's exactly what I'm going to do because I just cant live like this anymore and cant deal with him being drunk all time. It's already getting worse and I dont intend to take it any further...I deserve better.
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You've made the right choice.
Instead of feeling like You've "thrown away 14 Years of Your Life"......
Look instead that You have decided not to throw away the REST of Your Life.

I'm sorry, I know this is/has been/will be, painful but You Have Done The Right Thing For YourSelf.  You Can ONLY Change YourSelf.  Change for Him Can ONLY come from Him.  This I know is true.

My Dad remained married to my alcoholic Mother for 52 unhappy years.  She was still drinking when She died from Her alcoholism and my Dad died a year later.  They "loved" One Another for 52 miserably, unhappy years. He spent all those years trying to "save" Her, "rescue" Her, and it never happened.
I don't want You to suffer the Anguish and Despair I saw my Dad go through for 52 years (almost 4x's Your invested 14 years)  Please don't do that to YourSelf.
That being said, my heart is heavy for You.  I understand Your pain.
Good Luck
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4228027_tn?1360084803
Always remember hun you do derserve better keep your head up
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