This patient support community is for loved ones of people who drink and are trying to quit for discussions relating to abuse, behavioral issues, caring for yourself, counseling, divorce and separation, enabling, guilt, and when to get medical help.
I have been with my husband for a little over 2 yrs now. It was love at first sight and I swear in the two years we have been together through more than some do in a lifetime.we have beat addiction, conquered fears and done so much. We also have a son on the way I am almost 6 months pregnant. He is stoked and so am I even after a recent hardship of finding out
we both have hepatitis c.....
And the biggest problem other then low support system is his drinking. He's not a mean drunk. Just sometimes annoying or rude but usually upbeat. He is takinv things hard and although he's always drank now were talking like a bottle two bottles at night. Blackout drunk. Not remembering and being sick for a day back to it. I can't watch my husband kill himself but I don't know how to stop it and I can't and wont walk away. I feel like I'm watching a train wreck over abd over. His dad died an alcoholic....so he should know better right? Wtf do I do
There is nothing we can do to make our loved ones stop if they have the disease of alcoholism. I have the disease, I'm in recovery now, and it's the disease itself that made me stop. I reached the bottom I needed to reach and finally had enough. I joined AA on my own accord. In AA I've also seen people come in with sheets to sign for the judge's court order after getting busted for DUI. And I've seen some of those same people stay clean and sober even after they no longer needed to have the sheet signed or be drug and alcohol tested. I didn't get AA, AA got me.
As for you, the best you can do is completely allow your husband the consequences he gets from his drinking and hope he doesn't go too far down the ladder of alcoholism. Also, by attending Al-anon meetings in your area, even just one group a week you can get support and vast experience in the area of living with an alcoholic. (I've belonged to Al-anon for 14 years because of my daughter's past addictions) Try it. (it's free) Listen to what they have to say and then say what you have to say. You'll get some helpful feedback, and feel much better talking in person to others in our situation. If you choose to stay in Al-anon you'll also get your life back. Also, on this community's site you'll find years worth of post from people just like us with the exact same problem. Lots of reading to do! You're not alone any more with this msknezek. I wish you the best. Stay in touch!
Thank you so much I do hope things begin to get better and congratulations on yoir own recovery. I have personally been healed of all my addictions for 8 months and my life has gotten much better. So being a addict myself I pray he gets the help he needs second day without drinking today and every day is filled with hope I must hold onto it stops. I used to give ultimatums I couldn't bring myself to follow through with so now I explain how it could affect his son in the future and that he needs to realize he is going to be a role model. Thank you for ur comment advice and support. I will keep posted
Most of the success stories that I've heard, including my own and my husband's are tied to quitting finally, because of children, so I'm praying that your pregnancy is what finally turns the light on with your husband. My husband and myself both found out we had HepC early on in our relationship and had to quit drinking immediately because of that. Drinking alcohol and taking drugs is deadly to us, and it was really hard to justify seeing as we both had a child, from a previous marriage to protect. We both went to rehab, so that we had the best foundation for our recovery in the early years, and that of course included AA and NA.
Medhelp is a huge support for addicts, and I'm wondering if it would be helpful to you, for your husband to become involved here for support? You're in our thoughts and prayers, and if you ever need to talk, we're here for you.
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