This patient support community is for loved ones of people who drink and are trying to quit for discussions relating to abuse, behavioral issues, caring for yourself, counseling, divorce and separation, enabling, guilt, and when to get medical help.
Hubby was scheduled to go in for a bunch of blood work/heart tests this A.M.
Last night I reminded him that he had to fast for 12 hours prior, which meant no beer, food, etc after 8:00 P.M.
For some odd reason I told him to eat avacado for supper because this would help to lower the cholestrol levels.
I also told him all afternoon not to drink too much beer etc. Told him to drink lots of water to flush out his system too.
I've had all these tests, so I know how to make things temporarily better. lol
He looked across the table at me and said:
" No, I'm not going to do anything different tonight except stop drinking and eating at 8."
I asked him why, and he replied:
" Because I want the doctor to see how I really am, he won't be able to help me unless he gets an accurate picture of
my real lifestyle."
What do you make of that? It sounds like he really does want help this time.
Am I correct or do you think he's just saying that? Why would he just say that if it weren't true?
My dad used to do all sorts of things to try and "cheat"...like bring a cup of someone else's urine. lol
Anyone else here believe him? I want to...I really do...but don't want to get my hope up.
Then again, maybe he thinks he doesn't have a problem, so he feels that he has nothing to hide...
We're both going in on the 13th...him for his results and me for my pre-natal...we'll go in together and I'll see what he has to say then.
i dont know wether hes being truthful or not, but what i dont understand is why you would say "you know how to make these things temporarily better"??? surely you want the test done as they really are, so he gets the help he needs, or for him to realise how hes hurting his body! i am sorry, but whats with the lol,? none of this is funny, you were going to give an ultimation ? sorry if i got your post wrong , but the word enabling comes to mind, take care
So far so good.
He's on champix to quit smoking. I have to go the "cold turkey" route because of the pregnancy, but my friend bought me a book on how to quit the easy way.
Hope it works.
He never had any beer yesterday at all, nor did he have the urge to run to the store to buy more. We'll see how it goes today. One day at a time right?
He knows that he has to quit drinking or he will never stop smoking. If he doesn't quit smoking he's going to die.
The day before though he started talking like a true chronic: He said that maybe he could quit smoking with these pills and still be able to drink...bad choice of words there...with me being emo and all...I slapped him and ran away crying.
Never talk "stupid talk" to a pregnant woman.
I know that slapping him and crying did nothing at all to help him, but I'm pregnant and can't control my darn hormones...
He attributes all of his problems to the smoking...and it's because he lied to his doctor.
His doctor told him that his lungs were at 30% because of the smoking and because of the crack habit that he broke 3 years ago now.
He told his doctor that he only drinks a beer or two every other day or so...I didn't know that until I went to pick up all of the new meds his doctor is putting him on.
I handed the pharmacist all of the papers that the doctor had just given him...I didn't know that his "stop smoking contract" was mixed in with the prescriptions.
The pharmacist read the papers and mentioned that he had beer "once in a while". I told her "no, he drinks every day". She asked me if I was sure...I live with him...of course I'm sure.
She called the doctor because some of the new meds won't help if he's a drinker.
Nw they are more worried about his beer withdrawl (withdrawal) than the smokes. She says he's about to go through one heck of a time...just like my dad did the last 3 days of his life...
He now has exactly 10 days left to butt out for good. They told me to wean him off of the beer at the same time or else none of this is going to work well. Like I have any control over what he does? Do they think I've never tried? Ugh!
They said that it's too bad his lungs were in such rough shape because they would like to stretch this out a little longer so that the beer withdrawls wouldn't be so intense. He's been drinking since he was 16...so this is going to hurt him badly. Yes, he's a functioning alcoholic...if people he works for offer him a beer he'll drink at work.
I talked to him about the lie he told his doctor and I told him that he needed to wean off of the beer. That's when he made that comment.
He's terrified to quit smoking, but more so to quit drinking.
I told him that if he could give up the crack then he would have no problems with the smoking and hopefully the beer.
Kind of sickening how the guy that sits there and tells the life insurance guy that he did crack, smokes, and drinks like a fish ( which made them reject him) won't tell his doctor (the guy trying to save his life) the truth.
I asked him why he lied. (If you re-read the upper post he said that he wanted a "true result" so that he could get the help he needs)
His answer? He said that if you take the average of the
beer he's drank in his entire lifetime ( 16- 47) that it comes to around 2 beer a day! Ugh!
Are you taking care of yourself through all of this? Quitting smoking can be a challenge especially when you are dealing with your hormones in your pregnancy.
Ugh and I hate to say it but any alcoholic I have ever been involved with has trouble being honest. In fact that's part of their issue, is they have trouble being honest with themselves, let alone other people. And loved ones of alcoholics can tend to get a cloudy perspective too cause we are so intensely involved.
Sorry I read your other post first before this one, glad you came back to update us.
yes, i am also glad you came back, you have a lot to contend with, seattlemom has said it all really, he really has to be honest with everyone including himself! it is amazing how an alcoholic can come up with lots of ways to divert from the real truth, but it looks like you have his measure! its a good job you finally got the truth from him, he has to taper a bit from the drink to avoid seizures, i really hope for his, yours and your childrens sake he beats this addiction, but you must put you and your unborn child first!i really wish you well, god bless.
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