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Coping with an Alcoholic Parent

Hello everyone, I'm Taylor, & I'm 15. My mother is an extremely bad alcoholic, & has been this way going on 10 years. In the past few years, she's resulted to drinking hand sanitizer because she couldn't access beer or vodka. She's very abusive when she is drunk, verbally & physically. My dad walked out when I was around 9, leaving me to take care of my mother when she was drunk. Through all the abuse & constantly watching her, feeling like I have no where to turn, I feel like giving up. I guess my question is, how can you cope with it all when your world seems to be caving in?
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7052683 tn?1392938795
Hi Taylor,

Just checking in to see how things are going for you. Keep us posted with your thoughts, K?

CMKL
Helpful - 0
7052683 tn?1392938795
Hi Taylor,
Yes there seems to be a genetic predisposition to alcoholism. Had I known this when I first began drinking I would have never started. My grandfather was the one in my family. Even though my mother Never drank, I still found a way to become a drunk.

Please be vigilant when around alcohol. You are young and with that youth comes temptation to try new things at parties. Fortunately you will be one of the smart ones and say no thanks to alcohol and drugs.

I am so happy you have your grandparents as a support system. Try some of the programs I suggested---you will make new friends with people like yourself.

.......and WOW an A grade average with all this turmoil in your life. Good for you. I knew you were an intelligent young lady by your post. This is why the lessons you will learn from caring for your mother, coupled with your "smarts" are going to take you far. You have a very bright future , young lady, and alcohol and drugs have NO place in it, K?

Keep in touch,
We are here for you, Taylor
CML
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
My mothers parents are who I stay with most of the time, which is a few houses down from my mothers house. I understand that alcohol addiction is a sickness, & that it runs in my family. I've also been sick for two months with nausea, & no one really knows why. All of this, on top of keeping my straight A average in school is very stressful. Having you reply means a lot, thanks for taking the time to read & reply.
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7052683 tn?1392938795
My Dear Taylor,

I am so very sorry one so young has had such an overwhelming responsibility placed on them. Are you aware there are adults who cannot deal with this type of situation. Yet here you are , wise beyond your years,
handling this situation with grace and compassion.
You, my dear, may not realize this now, but the adversity you deal with now will be  your springboard to a future where you can accomplish great things. So please use this situation for empowerment.

From you post I feel you have an insight into the world that so many people (adults) have not ever found. This I am sure raises you above others  your age and older. So as not to feel so alone, you should be with  others your age who are going through similar situations.

Are you aware there are programs for Children of Alcoholics--forums like this with young people sharing their stories. The most important thing for you, Taylor, is to know you are NOT alone.  I sense from your post you have a great ability to "cope", as you have done just that for the last 10 years , all on your own. Even your father does not have the strength you have.  You can and should be so very proud of yourself . Coping is what you do, what you have exceeded at.--what you need  is having others who understand exactly what you are going through.

Are you aware there are groups for Children of Alcoholics and an AA program called Al Anon where the families of Alcoholics can gain support?
You can find them listed on the web for the state and town you are in. Let's begin there, K?

Now ,do you have grandparents still alive and do they live near you?
Are you emotionally close to them?
Family should be your first stop. Share what you are going through and let them take some of this burden OFF you shoulders. Your mothers parents should be made aware of this situation and are the ones who should shoulder most of this  responsibility .  

Would you be able to provide us with a little family background and why your mother has become your full responsibility? Maybe we can figure out a plan of action to remove this immense pressure on you.

I will wait to hear from you before going further. Would that be ok with you?
You also may private email me, but I know many others hear will try and help once they see your post.

Just so you know there is another forum here for the "living with an alcoholic". It might help for you to also post on that site. The members here will not let you down. Many of us have gone through the same situation .

I will wait for your response before going further .
Sincerely,
CML
Helpful - 0
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