Just Wondering

[ibizan]

As my brain was racing away yesterday with the tragedy in Connecticut,I could not help but wonder are there any parents or family members struggling with their recovery or had established sobriety before this took place?What a test of ones recovery program this would call for!My prayers go out to them ALL!May they do their best to not pick up the first drink...or drug...it won't change a darn thing or restore their loss!sigh!:(

[ibizan]

For all her decline and delusions.....she AGAIN said to me this year....."u have another anniversary coming up don't u"?GEEZ!where does this come from?29 years I told ur brother....he said nah not that long!"she then says i know its been a journey for u!its been 29 years but i will tell u that the sleeping serpent of addiction in me whispers b4 i go see her.....and there is this part of me that doesn't want to go......Wouldn't it be nice to smoke a big fat doob?and I know that thought is a ESCAPE one!Every time I see her she is diminished more and more!:( I fight my sadness yet i know so many others go thru this!I watched a man run out in tears-his father doesn't know who he is anymore,but he still goes...been 8 years for him!I laugh @ myself for the getting high thought...but goes to show u OUR BRAINS can flip in the blink of an eye!but i've too much to lose to go there...and know it won't change her condition....still hafta deal w/it when the high is gone!

[dominosarah]

It is so sad and pathetic to see people act the way your one sister does.  Gas mileage?  Really?  When the time comes for your mom to pass, you and your brother will be far richer than any amount of money.  You took the time with your mom and you will both know it.  She may not be able to communicate like she used to but i believe somewhere inside their body and mind they know you are there.  Look at what recovery has done for us, it has brought out the human in us~

[ibizan]

There will be cat who was abandoned thru no fault of its own that gets along w/dogs that will cross ur path!My one sister doesn't visist my mom much anymore or help my brother w/her supplies-Depends etc.She said she's worried @ retiring next year and wants to be reimbursed gas mileage for visiting!she forgets what all my mom did for her 40 years ago when she returned home to live...abused and pregnant and we helped her get back on her feet and helped her raise her children!My other sister my mom banned...said she was breaking in2 her room and stealing from her..we know she wasn't....its the dementia!now she has said she can return to visit but she has xcuses as to why she won't go..and they are completely selfish!Both my bro and I have said that when my mom is gone the fur is really gonna fly...and i know it will!My one sis told me years ago that if i ever got ill she'd help care for me.the other day she told me my dog rescue friends could help me...she would be too busy!Yep she remembers who I am when i tell her......i go visit once a month for its a two hour round trip and conversation is not possible w/her anymore!My heart goes out to those w/ a newly dx'd Alzheimers loved one..or in my mom's case Lewy Body Dementia...it is a downer!i will go Xmas to visit...then come home to my 4 legged loved ones!

[dominosarah]

I wanted to foster a cat but decided against it as i would never be able to let go!  I have been "peeking" at some lately!  I want a big black one with an attitude!  People dont want to adopt a black one due to superstitions..I dont want a kitty either, i just dont have the time or energy.  

You have much better self control than i would dealing with those women!  I can just hear my sailor mouth now!!  lol  How disrespectful some people can be..geez.  Do they visit your mom?  When you visit and tell her who you are does she remember then?

Grandbabies are growing so fast.  The little one just had tubes and her adenoids out.  The 11 yr old has noticed the difference between boys and girls!!

I hope the fainting goat is playing hard to get!!!

[ibizan]

Don't u think u need to give another homeless kitty a home?there is one out there for u that is dog-friendly!i have ceramic trees in home..my cats have destroyed real and fake ones!My mom?:(the dementia continues to ravage her...i have to introduce myself to her when i visit.....she isn't sure who I am!i will push thru the holidays...gathering @my brothers and will do my utmost to keep peace despite wanting to tell 2 well off sisters where to go who are squabbling over my moms estate and she's still here!grrrrrr!i am so grateful that Cisco  newest big black greyhound boy is spending his first Xmas w/us!he is such a love!Scarlet has 2 BF'S!that granbaby gettin big?

[dominosarah]

I am doing pretty good.  This holiday season has been hard and i feel like the grinch but i will get thru it!   The memories come flooding in and the tears start to flow.  It still seems not real at times that both of them are gone.

I did get my tree decorated yesterday.  I hung the candy canes as the dogs sat and watched me.  I gave them the stern "Leave it" and they continued on their way.  I decorate basically half way down anyways soooo i go to the store and come back....first thing i see is some garland on the rug, sniffed both their faces,  YEP, they smelled like a peppermint stick!!!  It then dawned on me that the tree police was no longer there, Snickers!!   He guarded HIS tree and didnt let them near!!  I miss my boy~

How is your mom?  Is the disease progressing?  And how are all your babies?

[ibizan]

I would have fired up a BIG one...followed by the drink!yes we need to make BIG changes in this country....but a blanket of support for these families they have!how u doing dear?i sent u a pm.......didn't hear back from u!i c from ur activity in other forums ur helping others as usual!:)