Aa
Still Struggling
Hi Just asking question for any recovered alcoholics out there.
I'm still having trouble... as of now my last binge drinking session was December 5th, 2010... which is when I crashed my car pretty bad. I have identified myself as an alcoholic for over 1 year now and had been sober for 3 months, had 1 binge, then went sober for another 3 months. By the time this past May came along I was already back to weekly binges once or twice a week. But then I started on a weekend basis again... of course I've missed work, school. I get the shakes that peak on the 3rd day and last for about a week. Mind you my nerves are still jittery, I smiled and my was shaking. Have seen addiction counselors and the whole bit because I desperately need to quit. I recognize the progression of this alcoholism on my health. Also for the record I have developed quite the tolerance, I can easily drink 10 in a single night and every drink I have pushes me to have another drink and it's almost always uncontrollable.
Just curious if anyone has any suggestions to help me stay sober? I know my life will end in disaster if I don't stop drinking... I just want to put an end to my alcoholism once and for all...
I'm still having trouble... as of now my last binge drinking session was December 5th, 2010... which is when I crashed my car pretty bad. I have identified myself as an alcoholic for over 1 year now and had been sober for 3 months, had 1 binge, then went sober for another 3 months. By the time this past May came along I was already back to weekly binges once or twice a week. But then I started on a weekend basis again... of course I've missed work, school. I get the shakes that peak on the 3rd day and last for about a week. Mind you my nerves are still jittery, I smiled and my was shaking. Have seen addiction counselors and the whole bit because I desperately need to quit. I recognize the progression of this alcoholism on my health. Also for the record I have developed quite the tolerance, I can easily drink 10 in a single night and every drink I have pushes me to have another drink and it's almost always uncontrollable.
Just curious if anyone has any suggestions to help me stay sober? I know my life will end in disaster if I don't stop drinking... I just want to put an end to my alcoholism once and for all...
Best Answer
And a continuous spiral downwards is what it is. Even if it's just 1 binge a week, a month, or anytime for that matter. It's always been a downwards plunge with drinking bringing you down and making you a little worse off in life than you were before. Then it's liver pains the next day, being totally 'sick' and not being able to do absolutely anything, and even the 2nd day after I'm still not back to normal yet. It's about almost a week to recover from a single binge!
I keep thinking that I can make my own decision to quit drinking but so far I haven't been able to do that completely on my own.
Next step is to attend a meeting in the New Year...
I have lots of things I need to do right now so I'm going to focus on keeping myself busy, I have all my priorities in check, and a long list of things to do.
Couple things is to see my family Doctor, just want to check liver function to see if there's any damage... but I know that there's "undetectable damage" at least. But just want to make sure there's nothing serious.
Another thing obviously is to check into my first meeting. I don't know if I would be the type of person that would attend a meeting everyday or even every week for that matter... but definitely gonna check into one to see what it's all about.
I watch Intervention regularly, and I've been reading stories from the grape vine.
Haven't been hanging out with any of my "drinking friends" lately which makes me rather lonely they'd usually be the ones I would go too when I'm lonely and bored... All my "non-drinking" friends are all busy with their lives! But I also made it clear to my drinking friends that I've been having serious problems with alcohol and it's time I go my own separate way now.
I keep thinking that I can make my own decision to quit drinking but so far I haven't been able to do that completely on my own.
Next step is to attend a meeting in the New Year...
I have lots of things I need to do right now so I'm going to focus on keeping myself busy, I have all my priorities in check, and a long list of things to do.
Couple things is to see my family Doctor, just want to check liver function to see if there's any damage... but I know that there's "undetectable damage" at least. But just want to make sure there's nothing serious.
Another thing obviously is to check into my first meeting. I don't know if I would be the type of person that would attend a meeting everyday or even every week for that matter... but definitely gonna check into one to see what it's all about.
I watch Intervention regularly, and I've been reading stories from the grape vine.
Haven't been hanging out with any of my "drinking friends" lately which makes me rather lonely they'd usually be the ones I would go too when I'm lonely and bored... All my "non-drinking" friends are all busy with their lives! But I also made it clear to my drinking friends that I've been having serious problems with alcohol and it's time I go my own separate way now.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Jacker is always right on w/his advice.....this drinking is nothing but a downward spiral!drugs 2....there is no controlled drinking or social drug use for us!NONE!i failed miserably at it for years b4 surrendering to a recovery program!
Hi Just wanted to thank you for your post... You are right when we booze we lose... and yes people that drink all the time aren't the greatest people out there, the people who actually DO things really are.
Yes I agree the actually DOing of things gets lost in alcoholism. After some of my binges I remember feeling useless to those around me, even for days after sobering, and even having dreams of being a useless empty person.
You know when I think about that drunken journalism thing, I wouldn't have many fun drunken memories either... Especially lately... Social Dramas, lost things, a drained bank account, it just causes disorder in all areas of life. I don't really think there has been anything gained in drinking at all for me, just damage and destruction to myself and those around me.
Yes I agree the actually DOing of things gets lost in alcoholism. After some of my binges I remember feeling useless to those around me, even for days after sobering, and even having dreams of being a useless empty person.
You know when I think about that drunken journalism thing, I wouldn't have many fun drunken memories either... Especially lately... Social Dramas, lost things, a drained bank account, it just causes disorder in all areas of life. I don't really think there has been anything gained in drinking at all for me, just damage and destruction to myself and those around me.
I dabbled in and out of binge drinking after an initial detox from my daily drinking. It took me too long to address the problem, so I'm hoping you'll pick it up faster than I did- I'm slow!
In the end, I had to examine the negative consequences. I began to keep a journal of each drunken episode, and found that none of my drunks ended well. The alcoholic mind hides this fact from you, but once you journal it, you begin to see that you cannot win at this game.
Another factor, is finding interests other than drinking. There is a lot to do in this world, and it's no fun to become so crippled that you cannot function. Explore your interests.....people who actually DO things are interesting. People who simply drink, are not.
Read recovery literature and books to better understand the mind of an alcoholic. I recommend the Big Book of AA, and there are other readings that can supplement it. Regardless of what you do with AA, the book is a VERY good read.
In the end, you have to re-think your life and come up with new priorities. I spent this Christmas sober....something I seldom did in the past. I even "re-gifted" some alcoholic gifts that were given to me by others who do not yet know that I've quit. I gave the bottles to non-alkies who will enjoy it.
Your description of your symptoms above fit that of an alcoholic. I can tell you from experience that drinking will never be the same again, so it's time to find a new path.
In the end, I had to examine the negative consequences. I began to keep a journal of each drunken episode, and found that none of my drunks ended well. The alcoholic mind hides this fact from you, but once you journal it, you begin to see that you cannot win at this game.
Another factor, is finding interests other than drinking. There is a lot to do in this world, and it's no fun to become so crippled that you cannot function. Explore your interests.....people who actually DO things are interesting. People who simply drink, are not.
Read recovery literature and books to better understand the mind of an alcoholic. I recommend the Big Book of AA, and there are other readings that can supplement it. Regardless of what you do with AA, the book is a VERY good read.
In the end, you have to re-think your life and come up with new priorities. I spent this Christmas sober....something I seldom did in the past. I even "re-gifted" some alcoholic gifts that were given to me by others who do not yet know that I've quit. I gave the bottles to non-alkies who will enjoy it.
Your description of your symptoms above fit that of an alcoholic. I can tell you from experience that drinking will never be the same again, so it's time to find a new path.
Well I think so... ever since my crash I started smoking again... And today was my first day not smoking since and I'm going absolutely nuts! I just want a drink or a smoke or something! All I have is a few Lorazepam left to calm me down which help so much but I realize how addictive they can be so I've limited them to only 1 a day if that. No clue what I'm going to do after that. Hopefully attend a meeting.
Yup I know I am definitely. Alcohol has made me less of a person than I can truly be. I've missed out on life, learning, growth, personal development, hurt my liver, forgot things I should have remembered, drink uncontrollably always craving another drink after another, crashed my car even. I'm hella shaky after my binges and I get nauseous for a few days after too. So a huge adverse affect on my health, life, personality, emotional and spiritual well being.
COMMUNITY LEADER
i didn't have ANY sober friends when i got sober...none!i never had any trouble going to a bar alone to drink...drinking alone in my apt.....never had any problems going to buy drugs alone..or using alone.....so i figured if i put as much energy in2 recovery as i did all the aforementioned i mite make it!i didn't love AA or NA......i NEEDED it and the ones w/good recovery i sought out were in those rooms....nowhere else......so if u want sobriety u must stop caving in2 ur weak excuses to drink.....and they are flimsy...and not go to a bar...not buy alcohol.......not lift it to ur lips and swallow for no one makes u do it but u!there are so many meetings now during this troublesome holiday season for those newly sober........run to the next one........don't walk!:)oh by the way i think ur counselor is fulla poop...borderline alcoholic????that is ridiculous..like being a lil bit pregnant...either u r......or u aren't....and U KNOW UR!!!!!:)
Thanks my heart goes out to you.
See the sad thing is I knew about the impact of alcohol on the liver all along and yet that hadn't been enough to make me stop drinking.
From a medical point of view is that the liver stores alcohol as fat, so you get these fatty deposits kinda like marble cheese. Of course these fats become used up and you get missing liver tissue there kind of like swiss cheese. Then this empty space may redevelop but can also get scar tissue there hence sclerosis.
I know that but it's not enough sometimes for me to stop drinking!!! I need something else to prevent me from picking up that first drink! My heart goes out to you!
See the sad thing is I knew about the impact of alcohol on the liver all along and yet that hadn't been enough to make me stop drinking.
From a medical point of view is that the liver stores alcohol as fat, so you get these fatty deposits kinda like marble cheese. Of course these fats become used up and you get missing liver tissue there kind of like swiss cheese. Then this empty space may redevelop but can also get scar tissue there hence sclerosis.
I know that but it's not enough sometimes for me to stop drinking!!! I need something else to prevent me from picking up that first drink! My heart goes out to you!
Hey just wanted to thank you guys for your feedback...
Please any more comments are always appreciated.
All I want for Christmas is Sobriety!!!
Please any more comments are always appreciated.
All I want for Christmas is Sobriety!!!
Thanks... I know I can't do it on my own... Tried the counseling, tried the education on how harmful alcohol is on the health tried all of that. Even identified myself with alcoholism.
That still hasn't been enough to get me on the path of sobriety. And yes it is a huge emotional roller coaster. When I'm with my sober friends it seems like I'm the only one who's not happy. My emotions aren't stable and happy, I'm depressed.
I don't really know what came first the depression or the alcoholism... or is it the alcoholism and then the depression. It's a what came first the chicken or the egg type analogy. And the other question I have I don't know if alcoholism is a choice or a disease. But if it is a disease it sure has progressed pretty badly.
You are right... I just need to goto an AA meeting, those are the only types of people who can relate to what I've been through might be able to understand where I've come from.
That still hasn't been enough to get me on the path of sobriety. And yes it is a huge emotional roller coaster. When I'm with my sober friends it seems like I'm the only one who's not happy. My emotions aren't stable and happy, I'm depressed.
I don't really know what came first the depression or the alcoholism... or is it the alcoholism and then the depression. It's a what came first the chicken or the egg type analogy. And the other question I have I don't know if alcoholism is a choice or a disease. But if it is a disease it sure has progressed pretty badly.
You are right... I just need to goto an AA meeting, those are the only types of people who can relate to what I've been through might be able to understand where I've come from.
Yes.... triggers such as my drinking friends are huge! I find my sober friends are always busy doing something, then I get lonely, and my drinking friends are available to bring me down. That's when I hit up the liquor store, the bar, and before you know it I'm back into the drinking habit, after awhile I'm drinking alone even.
I don't know I think crashing my car was more of a blessing than a curse. A curse as a result of drinking but a blessing because I can't get to my drinking friends now, and I can't drive to the liquor store. My accident could have been a million times serious had someone got hurt and I know people have been in the same situation I have been in that didn't get out so lucky and for that I'm kicking myself and feel so remorseful.
I haven't ever been to an AA meeting and seriously considering attending one. It's just not something I have ever experienced and so there's a feeling of unfamiliarity with it for me.
I don't know I think crashing my car was more of a blessing than a curse. A curse as a result of drinking but a blessing because I can't get to my drinking friends now, and I can't drive to the liquor store. My accident could have been a million times serious had someone got hurt and I know people have been in the same situation I have been in that didn't get out so lucky and for that I'm kicking myself and feel so remorseful.
I haven't ever been to an AA meeting and seriously considering attending one. It's just not something I have ever experienced and so there's a feeling of unfamiliarity with it for me.
Okay here are my triggers... I drink when I'm happy, I drink when I'm sad, I drink when I'm with people, I drink when I'm alone, I drink when I want to celebrate, I drink when I fail in life.
Those are all my triggers, I was seeing the counselor in Summer time we had about 3 sessions together and she gave me a booklet to fill out. I went through it all and thought I was going to be sober.
Then I am sober and lonely... So i want to go out with friends, and then all my friends are drinkers so it doesn't make it easy for me. I have that first drink then from there on I cross the line into the drunk zone.
Consequences are... missed work (in the summer), missed school (in the fall), missed time with family, maybe even a missed day where i could have been doing something (on the weekend). I will drink and then the next day I am sick for the full day I will just lay in bed.
The counselor couldn't classify myself as an alcoholic only borderline alcoholic if that, and was even suggesting this "responsible drinking" program because I don't drink everyday and don't have that morning drink. But I know I have developed alcoholism either way because I do get the shakes something really bad! Even to this moment I'm a little shaky.
No I have never attended an AA meeting, and I am staying away from all my drinking friends right now, that has helped. The people that I have been around lately have all been strictly non drinkers and that has helped tremendously.
Those are all my triggers, I was seeing the counselor in Summer time we had about 3 sessions together and she gave me a booklet to fill out. I went through it all and thought I was going to be sober.
Then I am sober and lonely... So i want to go out with friends, and then all my friends are drinkers so it doesn't make it easy for me. I have that first drink then from there on I cross the line into the drunk zone.
Consequences are... missed work (in the summer), missed school (in the fall), missed time with family, maybe even a missed day where i could have been doing something (on the weekend). I will drink and then the next day I am sick for the full day I will just lay in bed.
The counselor couldn't classify myself as an alcoholic only borderline alcoholic if that, and was even suggesting this "responsible drinking" program because I don't drink everyday and don't have that morning drink. But I know I have developed alcoholism either way because I do get the shakes something really bad! Even to this moment I'm a little shaky.
No I have never attended an AA meeting, and I am staying away from all my drinking friends right now, that has helped. The people that I have been around lately have all been strictly non drinkers and that has helped tremendously.
Hi Patrick,
There were quite a few times I had tried to stop drinking. Usually with support of my wife but that was it. It wouldn't be long after that I would pick up again. Something inside me just needed that drink. I couldn't stop thinking about it. Life got pretty rough until one day I truly had had enough. I got involved with an IOP as well as AA. IOP was about three nights a week that weened eventually weened down to one night until I was dischrged upon completion of the program. I learned a lot about alcoholism and why I do the things I do. They also taught me how to deal with triggers as well as some of my emotions.
The place where I stay really learned how to stay sober was AA. There I met a lot of people who were willing to help. People just like you and me only difference being they were sober longer. They gave me some simple suggestions which helped me get right with myself along with other people and the world around me. If you are willing to do what it takes to get sober then I suggest you give AA a shot. It is a way that works when stick with it long enough. I found for me that when I thought it wasn't working I had to look at myself and see what I wasn't doing well enough. Turns out the program does work. I 'm the one that is screwed up. Please feel free to ask any questions. Take care and God Bless!!!
There were quite a few times I had tried to stop drinking. Usually with support of my wife but that was it. It wouldn't be long after that I would pick up again. Something inside me just needed that drink. I couldn't stop thinking about it. Life got pretty rough until one day I truly had had enough. I got involved with an IOP as well as AA. IOP was about three nights a week that weened eventually weened down to one night until I was dischrged upon completion of the program. I learned a lot about alcoholism and why I do the things I do. They also taught me how to deal with triggers as well as some of my emotions.
The place where I stay really learned how to stay sober was AA. There I met a lot of people who were willing to help. People just like you and me only difference being they were sober longer. They gave me some simple suggestions which helped me get right with myself along with other people and the world around me. If you are willing to do what it takes to get sober then I suggest you give AA a shot. It is a way that works when stick with it long enough. I found for me that when I thought it wasn't working I had to look at myself and see what I wasn't doing well enough. Turns out the program does work. I 'm the one that is screwed up. Please feel free to ask any questions. Take care and God Bless!!!
Hi, For me stopping drinking and getting sober were two different things.
The first thing I learned when I stopped drinking was that if I wanted to stay stopped I needed to stay away from people, places & things that I associated with my drinking, stay away from my so called friends, this was easy because once I stopped drinking they did not want to know me. I stayed away from places, bars, clubs off-licences etc. I stayed away from sport events, family events and so on where drink was available. Your commitment to this will reflect just how important getting sober is to you.
When I stopped my brain was like a roller-coaster, it would not let up, jumping from one emotion to another, fear, anger, paranoia & depression. I had to fix that and deal with the the other problems such as the people I had harmed by my drinking. This was the getting sober part, I needed to change from the drinking thinking. This I found after a few failed attempts to "do it my way" was hard and I could not do on my own, I went to a treatment center, I had Counselling & I went to AA. I now know that I was and always will be an Alcoholic, it is in my hands if I wish to remain a recovering Alcoholic or go back to the old ways, AA keeps me focused on staying sober one day at a time.
Ray
The first thing I learned when I stopped drinking was that if I wanted to stay stopped I needed to stay away from people, places & things that I associated with my drinking, stay away from my so called friends, this was easy because once I stopped drinking they did not want to know me. I stayed away from places, bars, clubs off-licences etc. I stayed away from sport events, family events and so on where drink was available. Your commitment to this will reflect just how important getting sober is to you.
When I stopped my brain was like a roller-coaster, it would not let up, jumping from one emotion to another, fear, anger, paranoia & depression. I had to fix that and deal with the the other problems such as the people I had harmed by my drinking. This was the getting sober part, I needed to change from the drinking thinking. This I found after a few failed attempts to "do it my way" was hard and I could not do on my own, I went to a treatment center, I had Counselling & I went to AA. I now know that I was and always will be an Alcoholic, it is in my hands if I wish to remain a recovering Alcoholic or go back to the old ways, AA keeps me focused on staying sober one day at a time.
Ray
Good morning Patrick. I see that I am only 12 years older than you and I have Cirrhosis. I drank and drank and let it take over my life. I didn't listen to the doctors that many times told me I have to stop drinking imediatley or I was going to die. Then one dreaded day my doctor told me I had jaundice and cirrhosis. Patrick, I gotta tell ya man the hardest thing Ive ever had to do in my life was look at my wife who had tears falling from both her pretty eyes and tell her the news. I'm 38 be better than me!
Randy
Randy
COMMUNITY LEADER
no doubt u and ur counselor have developed a relapse prevention treatment plan asking u to identify ur relapse triggers and prevent them from happening b4 they happen!i have found that so many know them...but at that moment they want to drink...or drug......they are not thinking at all about the consequences after.NONE WHATSOEVER! it is truly a simple program that many complicate......no one can stop u from picking up that first drink.......but u!do u go to AA?are u around a sober support system???
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Alcoholism Community
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
