bulimia and black vomit and stool

[vividlyprosaic]

Ok so this is sort of complicated.  First of all, I am 28 and have been sort of bulimic since I was 13 or 14.  But not consistently (is there such thing as intermittent bulimia?) and had stopped for quite a while.  Also, I have depression and a lot of anxiety.  I was drinking a LOT for a while and stopped that, when I began dieting this time, because alcohol is fattening.  I had started having black stool and vomit I thought from drinking too much. I saw my doc and was prescribed some medication and eventually it felt better, she said I may have had an ulcer.  But the black stool and vomit are back, but I haven't been drinking.  Can this be caused by throwing up?  I don't do it very often.  And also, I don't binge.  So I guess it isn't really bulimia since I don't ever binge.  

I just started a new anti-depressant (Viibryd) and it isn't working.  I feel the same.  Actually I guess I feel a little better but all I can think about is jumping off a bridge or in front of a train.  I am at a total loss about what to do.  I am already in therapy but I can't tell her about the throwing up.  Or about the thoughts of jumping off something.

So I guess my question is, what now?

[dominosarah]

I see it and it is in big bold letters......Serenity prayer it is!

[ibizan]

U see what I mean dear?i've had so many ppl w/combined alcohol eating disorders respond this way....they'll address the alcohol but refuse to let go of a disorder that eventually many kill them....all u can do is say the Serenity Prayer ma dear!

[dominosarah]

Giving up isnt an option here.....We have all been romantically involved with the devil and we have made it thru....so can you.  Keep talking with us.

[rpooo]

Oh no you don't! you cant give up that easy okay. did you go to the link i posted here for you? your feelings of suiside are likely being caused by the new medication. did you read that?

[vividlyprosaic]

Thanks guys.  Your comments are helpful.  I just feel like giving up and I don't think I can do any of these suggestions.  But thanks.  

[dominosarah]

You need to get real honest with your doctor and tell him/her what is going on.  Take charge of your life, you are worth it~~sara

[ibizan]

U've really gotten some good advice here from all of the above.The only thing i will add to the comments is i am a 26 yr.veteran of the substance abuse counseling field.I am approaching 28 years sober/clean.Years ago i had restrictive aneurexia and never threw up.Buliemia/aneurexia are complex psychological disorders w/roots in depression.Many of my clients thru the years have refused to completely delve in2 this/and remedy w/me for reasons i've never understood and a referral to another counselor is pointless unless ur totally a non-click w/the counselor!Ur really doing some internal damage to ur body and its trying to tell u that!Also w/the vomiting ruptures will occur to ur esophagus and esophageal lining.....this can be fatal!I hope u totally get honest w/ur doctor and therapist ASAP!Please keep us posted!

[rpooo]

THIS IS SOMETHING I NEED YOU TO READ RIGHT AWAY AND DO EXACTLY AS IT SAYS. This infomation can be found at:

https://www.viibryd.com/


VIIBRYD

[crash2323]

It sounds like you are bleeding internally and need to go back to your doctor and explain that the problem has returned.  You need to do this asap.  If you don't get relief, go to another doctor--and if necessary, go to the emergency room.  They have to treat you there.  You don't want to be in a situation where your blood count drops too low.  Also, I had to try many antidepressants to find one that worked for me.  I did not have suicidal thoughts, however.  Why can't you tell your therapist about throwing up?  They may be related and if you don't feel like you can be totally open with your therapist, find another--again, asap!  You can get through this--just be insistant and persistant about your treatment.

[ducky406]

I second hthrfthr, if you don't feel comfortable telling your therapist these details you need to find a new therapist. These suicidal thoughts are signs that your antidepressants aren't working, and it's possible it's because of your bowel issues. Please talk with your doctor to figure out what is happening there, and find a new therapist. You may need to get onto a different antidepressant. However, it's essential to be comfortable and open with your therapist so if you can't find another.

[hthrfthr]

Hey. Coming from someone that was also an intermittent bulimic I see where u are coming from. But the black stool means blood in your stool. This actually happened to me and it turned out after I had a colonoscopy I had internal hemorroids and irritable bowel syndrome from all the years of screwing with my belly. Go back to the gi doc and tell them u want them to look further into what it could be. The procedures arent a blast but at least u will know what ur dealing with. Good luck :-) And if u cant tell your therapist something it is definitely time to find a new one. Don't jump off anything or in front of something, these things will work themselves out...