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I am a recovering alcoholic. I have 75 days sober now, I went to a out patient rehab. but now i am very depressed, my life is going pretty well i have a good job and a support network. but i am having intense suicidal thoughts and im afraid to tell any one.  my question is will this pass , is it just a symptom of alcohol recovery
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1666434 tn?1325262350
It gets easier and life will get better indeed.  Be patient with yourself during this process.  Going through any stages of recovery, we have to allow our bodies and our minds time to heal and come out of the fog.  This is really a life transition that you are going through and that can be overwhelming at times.  I think that's why the "one day at a time" helps so much.  We don't have to focus on the future, we don't have to focus on how we will feel tomorrow or predict how we will feel next week, we just have to put one foot in front of the other and deal with today as it comes.  Definitely keep talking about how you feel and keep being honest too.  You have already come so far with 75 days, keep it up!
Helpful - 0
495284 tn?1333894042
Please dont be afraid to ask for help.  That is what your sponsor and your AA group is there for.  We all understand how you are feeling.  It's okay to let your feelings out.  We have numbed them for so long and they are foreign to us.  Let yourself feel, it means you are getting better.  When you see your doctor tell him how you are feeling.  They have many good AD meds now that will help get you over this hump.

Be proud of what you are accomplishing right now.  75 days is awesome!!  You have done all the hard work.  Keep talking with us here too, I am a recovering alcoholic so i know what you are going thru~~sara
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
We're here to help you anyway we can. Do not be afraid to ask for help and do not worry about what people will think and say. This is all about you. Your recovery, your physical health and mental health. Can you give your sponsor a call?  
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thanks guys, I am involved in AA and have a sponsor.its just so hard for me not to put on my happy face and act like everything is ok, I guess im just afraid to ask for help because of what people might think or say. I do have a apointment to see a doctor.  since this is somewhat anyomus, I just have to get it out Im sitting here typing and crying I just cant stop thinking about it. it seems so close I just dont know.
Helpful - 0
370181 tn?1595629445
75 days sober is awesome and you need to be extremely proud of yourself. But as with many addictions, it can get worse before it gets better and I think you've hit what we use to call "5 miles of bad road." It will pass, but you're still very new to recovery and you need to get yourself some support immediately. You said you had a good support network......get hold of them NOW............you absolutely do not have to be afraid to share these thoughts and by sharing them, you take away their power, you realize it's just a thought brought on by the struggle. Being alone and keeping this thought to yourself is what gives it power. It's testing you, taunting your will power. Show it how strong you've become by telling others what it's trying to do to you. Beat it at it's own game!
Do you go to AA meetings? If you can't get hold of any of your support network, find the closest meeting and get there. You NEED to be around people who understand what you're going through right now.
Your life sounds quite positive..........you're 75 days sober, you have a good job and a good support network. I think it's probably very normal to have feelings of anxiety, depression and even a suicidal thought while your mind, body and spirit grapples with learning to live sober. I do believe these feelings will pass. I also believe it's very, very important for you to get involved with AA, get a sponsor you can call when the scary thoughts push their way in.
I agree with tschock that if you've been given no medication to help you get through these really bad times, it might be a very good idea to go to an urgent care clinic and let them know what you're going through. As she said, they can give you something that will help. I also hope that you can speak with your doctor about the pros and cons of getting on some antidepressants and getting into some therapy which would be a tremendous help while you find your footing.
You're so young and your whole life is still ahead of you..............focus on the horizon.
Stay strong
Peace
Greenlydia
Helpful - 0
209987 tn?1451935465
First off, let me say: Congratulations!!!

When my dad had quit one time, he too had suicidal thoughts.

I'm not going to assume that this is part of the recovery, but instead I'm going to refer you to both the alcoholism forum and the depression forum.
You can copy and paste this into both forums.

If you can't find the answers you need in either one of those forums, then I would suggest seeing  your doctor...in fact, I would suggest seeing a doctor regardless. They are able to "give you something" to help with these feelings.
Don't be ashamed or embarrased to get the help that you need. You are too important to let yourself fall.

Perhaps when dominosarah comes online, she can be of more help to you.
Helpful - 0
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