remember me?

[Cici_xo]

hey all, im not sure if any of you remember me but im back! its been a while since ive been on here.  As it goes, I am drinking again unfortunately.  Ive recently been diagnosed with bipolar and my doc says it has alot to do with my drinking patterns.  The drinking isnt out of hand like before but it still ***** that im doing it again. Anyway, does anyone else have bipolar and struggle with addiction?

[Nighthawk61]

You don't need to wonder dear girl if you're remembered by your friends on Medhelp sweetie. We love you, we care for you, we want the best for you. Rpoo asked you why not be the girl that Mr Right is looking for , and not somebody always at the bar being hammered? I've read your posts, Rpoo could easily be your sponsor,online, you're not alone, and your past doesn't go away because your still drinking. Your past doesn't change, until you change your present.

I'm going to repeat my status line for you to maybe think about, okay? Because it seems to speak volumes of your situation.

Great Spirits dance around the circle fire. The circle doesn't move. We move away from the circle. All around is darkness.

I've read all of your posts, because I care about YOU. I wish the best for you, when you forget about the real issues at hand. I'm praying for you about the things you don't see clearly. Because I'm clean and sober, for 13+ years. I didn't get clean alone, there were some that cared about my sobriety , those days that I couldn't or wouldn't. That's who we are as a group. You are loved Cici, by many addicts, clean and sober now. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. I too have cirrhosis of the liver, like my friend Rpoo. You're on a dangerous trajectory, should you continue on the way you're going. Please help God Help You!~xoxoxo Hugs not drugs, Liz

[Nighthawk61]

Hawkdove made a very important point when she said "A lot of doctors can mis-diagnose too. In other words, it is easy for a doctor to diagnose Bi-polar when, in fact, they are just dealing with a very vreative and lively personality." SO TRUE. WHICH CAME FIRST THE CHICKEN OR THE EGG. I was not diagnosed by a doctor that I had Bi-Polar, but had i been the type to break through my denial long enough to talk to a doctor, i'm sure I would have been. I exhibited all the signs when i was drinking, and not so much when i was clean and sober. Nothing i couldn't deal with naturally. Thankfully, I'[m glad that i really got myself good and clean, before I accepted any more drugs thrown at me. All these drugs that your on, what about if your bipolar symptoms were as a consequence of your drinking? What if you never had to be on these drugs at all? I mean, we all know that doctors throw pills at an addict, and are a huge part of the problems of addiction. Please get clean and sober, I know you need to, I've read all of your posts. Get clean and sober and revisit whether you need to be on any medication. Please don't continue to throw your life away. Girl, talk to a therapist about what is happening that is driving you to drink. You mentioned in one post that your mom was an alcoholic and it was very hard not to obsess about beer because she kept the fridge full of it. What have you done to support your sobriety by leaving this living situation. You also said that you made friends easily, and i read Rpoo suggesting you get into college and make clean and sober friends there. What's going on with you about you supporting your sobriety, so you don't waste your life in a futile manner trying to juggle drugs that your drinking has probably caused?

[Nighthawk61]

Hello Cici, I had to laugh with Rpoo when you asked if you were remembered on here. You spoke from your soul girl, and there were so many that listened. We know how you're feeling (because we've been in your shoes), We care about how you're feeling (because that's what clean and sober addicts do) We hope for you (because we've found relief from drinking and drugging and know what a good clean and sober life is all about now) and we can see through your denial (because we've all lived through our own denial). We are your friends, we invest ourselves in you. You are one of us. You are not forgotten because you relapse. Your wish for a happy life free from substance abuse, doesn't go away because you're in denial honey. Simply, you've relapsed. Once you know that you need to quit, once you've come to that in your mind and heart, it won't go away with smoke and mirrors.

Rpoos , Ibizan and so many other, including myself, people like you who are enjoying their lives immensely now that they've grown enough to put a stop to hurting themselves will be forever in your corner. We don't forget you, you may forget us, but we don't forget you sweetheart.

[ibizan]

Congrats on the 17 years.......hard work but well worth it indeed!hope to see u post more often here.....we really need folks w/long term recovery active in the forum!

[hawkdove]

Hi there

Have been alcohol addicted many time Ci ci and many times I have been carted to hospital in withdrawal. !!!  :):):  Alcohol was a horrid drug and the withdrawal was dreadful.

Have been clean and sober for the 17 years now but still remember what it was like battling with the booze.

A lot of doctors can mis-diagnose too. In other words, it is easy for a doctor to diagnose Bi-polar when, in fact, they are just dealing with a very vreative and lively personality. You have to watch you do not follow the diagnosis ...that is ....live up to being Bi-polar. It's surprising how a formal diagnosis can influence the way we act !!!

Depression is horrible and all of us ...whether drinkers or not ....need to evolve ways of heading it off before it settles. On this note, Dr Claire Weeks' books are indispensible.

Hope this helps. please e,ail if you think I can help.

Vince :)  

[rpooo]

Hrm, lets see.. I do remember you! lol Hi Cici! You may also wish to try MedHelp's Bipolar community.

http://www.medhelp.org/forums/Bipolar-Disorder/show/160
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I think this would also be a very benifical article for you to read:

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/bipolar-you/201010/alcohol-drugs-and-bipolar-disorder-bad-combination


Randy