Anger and 2009

[verlyn2]

I look around in this society today and see so many angry people could anyone tell me why? Is it due to the music that is being played over and over again it is only getting into our minds and heart. Referred to as MF,B,W and so on it makes one feel very sad not good about themselves and no one else.Being Angry all the time will cause bad health and an early death.I went to a anger management class that was recommended for my husband and son to attend at first I went I was the brave one.It is a very good class and they teach you how to avoid alot of uneccessary drama.Sadly the class ended it was cut out because of the Brush Administration no money.

[StressedInsomniac]

Some people have a reason to be angry, some people like me had tough childhoods and cannot forgive those who caused that bad childhood! In general I'm an angry person, being deceived and emotionally hurt by loved ones. Angry music, I listen to it may sound strange but it keeps me calm and alert. Although i have my own type of anger management. I cannot be angry or get angry around young children. So when I'm with my baby cousin for example I'm just so calm nothing can anger me.

[van_bc_604]

Anger's addictive. In fact, all strong emotions ARE addictive. That's why so many people always whine and complain and feel sorry for themselves. It's NON-PRODUCTIVE, but they do it over and over again because it feels good....a quick fix.

Bush...I love that guy!!!! first rate clown
I'm not kidding.... that's the only reason I like him !!!!! ....and for the fact I live in canada....lol

[teko]

I went to anger management class one time and it just p*ssed me off!. Sorry! Devil made me do it! lol  I do no what you mean!

[mammo]

Are you not aware that many, many people  are now unemployed, lost their retirement, and health insurance, homes and cars?  Jobs are not to be found anywhere, people don't know how they are going to feed and clothe their kids, and live with fear of what tomorrow will bring with this economy.  I'm fortunately not in this situation...yet, but I certainly understand the anger among us right now.  This world is a scarey place right now for all of us who have worked hard all their lives, others continue on their entitlement programs which the rest of us pay for.  No, I'm not angry, just telling it like it is.  You're correct, anger is dangerous and can eat you up inside, but don't judge others until you've walked in their shoes.

[mammo]

I too had a very abusive childhood, and have been deceived by my own family.  But you have to accept that the people who hurt us are the ones with issues, it was not our fault.  I chose to move on through therapy, and came to realize that I don't fit into their world, nor they in mine.  I rose above it all, and even though I was a victim back then, I refuse to be one any longer.  It sounds like you find a lot of peace in your cousin, being around kids has always done that to me also.  Try either with, or without therapy to accept that you've had bad people in your life in the past that took their problems out on you, but in no way does this reflect on you.  I know it hurts like hell, and the anger can be bad.  But the anger will eat you up, and keep you from living the happy life you deserve, and then these people win. Good luck to you.........

[verlyn2]

Hi,I was a physically abuse child until the age of 8. Beatings from my dad.I had trusting issues really bad.I was so eager to "fall in love" but in the wrong places,people and things. I always dreamed about being a wife,having a wonderful husband and children.Of course it did not happen that way.I was in a state of shock when my husband had multiple affairs due to being raised in a crazy family,son & husband fought like cats and dogs due to husband was not in sons life.Son became angry at everybody God,Specially me,he move out of state and have a family of his own .I divorce husband in 1984 remarried him in 1999.He died in 2006.I am in the healing process from all this anger.I am a peaceful person but I seem to atrract angry folks.My husband use to get angry at me for being calm andeven tempered.When I became upset he would do everything to calm me down.Son did the same also. Now I am enjoying my peaceful home life,being able to rest .My home is clittered when my son and his family lived with me they refuse to help me out and I'm angry because my home was left in a mess.I am tired of cleaning my sons messes.So I am getting up the strength to  clean it soon .And do must needed remolding my son would hit the walls knock holes .He has stop that stuff now.He used it as a way of control but soon he realized no one wanted to be around him cause of his behavior. Verlyn2

[verlyn2]

I am aware of the millions of people who are out of work.I live in Michigan had been feeling the out of work crunch for several years now. People was in this anger mode before  the economy was bad.Anger  is not going to get me money,solve my problems or give me peace.I had to learn ways to deal with life situation,I had to forgive my abusive father and other folks who did not treat me right as a child,teenager and adult. The last three weeks  I had been going to agencies that could help me pay my lights and gas. When I had money I took care of everyone but when I became jobless and no income coming in no help from the people I help.I was told I was suppose to help family. I learn a painful lesson from this. Angry people are hurting but they hurt innocent people too.That did not hurt them. Then the angry person always run to the folks they hurt for help.Refuse to return the help for those who have been there for anger ones. That hurts badly. Verlyn2

[teko]

I think unless there is something physical going on, medically, that a person has a choice of how to start their day. We can choose to be negative or we can choose to be positive, it is a choice and one that greatly impacts every one around us. Every one has problems, that is no excuse. We need to do something positive with all that energy and there is always someone that had or has it worse than ourselves. I cannot stand to spend time with someone who is always complaining and taking away my sunshine. It is a real downer and pulls me down too.

[verlyn2]

Teko,you are so correct. I can't stand it.It is good to start the day off with mediation,prayer because you can deal with the day. Thanks again Verlyn2

[margypops]

Many angry people are afraid ,the anger they are   lashing out from fear and uncertainty, loss of control of their lives and values as they have known it, anger has a place, it is good to have some anger I guess its the way it is used that isnt .

[kathy434]

I am still married to my only husband in life.  While he goes around in a cluless manner at home, and continually puts me down, says things about me to others that used to hurt me, has an explosive anger personality that used to scare the **** out of me, I have dealt with all my childhood abuse issues and my marriage issues as constructively as I possibly can.  I actually know that today, I am the healthiest person.  I have been the best influence on the health of my family.  I am proud of this.
My husband remains rigid, closed minded, afraid of his unknown, conservative, tight, superior, controlling, regimented and I would also venture to a degree unforgiving toward me.  It was very tough on me through our marriage and raising a family.  Yet, to the outside world, he is generous, loving, kind, friendly, active in organizations with worthy causes, a good parent, leader, provider, and amazingly good encourager to others...etc.  He is WONDERFUL in society.
Knowing today what I now know about myself, I am a good person.  I let him make a jerk of himself in public, because I don't have to believe anything he says.  He is no better than I.  I know when he explodes in anger, that it is his own problem.  He cannot always have his way, and he doesn't always have to be agreed with.  I am also in this world as an individual, with my own interests, ideas, beliefs, opinions, and I look upon my world around me with an open book in learning new things, people, places, interests etc.
I have just experienced his brother for the second time, having his moment of total explosion & totally unreasonable thinking, fear, threatening violence, hatred of others, the unknown, the lack of self education, self superiority, and anger at me because I did not back down an inch for him.  He yelled at the top of his voice, slammed his fists, put me down for my choices in government and seeing the good side of people.  He worked himself into such a furror that I thought he would drop over dead.  I remained totally calm throughout the scene.  But I felt no respect for him, that he would let his buddies form all his thinking without questioning their personal attitudes about life.  To be a puppet who doesn't think for himself or stand up for what is right.  He is somebody who doesn't read, watch TV news, or learn anything on his computer but jokes.  When his sister finally convinced him to stay for the meal as planned, and got him calmed down again, I listened to his conversation with her and then others, and I was just stunned by his subjects of interest to talk about.  He was an absolute thoughtless bore.  Here he came to me without even a Hello, and instigated this full fledge attack at me over total stupidity that warranted not even a mention.  My husband and his sister claim there was no yelling or fighting in their family of orgin.  Wow!  Another sister in law told me that there other brother also has an explosive anger personality.
At my husband's aunt death from cancer, she was in serious pain.  His sister called me as to what to do.  I am a nurse.  I contacted her caregivers that I was told that she was in serious pain and to please convey this message to her doctor.  He increased her pain medication.  As it was, she died that night.  At the funeral, the wife of my husband's mindless brother, yelled out at me and all the congregation that I murdered her.  I remained calm on the surface, but I wanted to box her ears.  She never apologized and I never bothered to speak to her again.
People who express anger, violence, hatred, superiority, are people to avoid.  They are useless non thinkers.  They will lap up anything that is threatening to them without putting the information or their speaker in proper prospective.  They threaten and they tell lies to scare other people.
Anger is good in the right frame of context.  You see an animal abused, you get angry and take action.  You see an elderly person mistreated.  You step in and advocate for them.  You don't turn your back on abused, hungry, sick children.  You get involved.  Anger can motivate a person to correct problems.
We were given the ability to choose how we deal with life situations.  Anger good, or anger bad.  They are all within our choices we make ourselves.

[verlyn2]

Kathy434, bless your heart. This is the behavior of alot of men today I do not understand why? Many homes un knowing to us, many family heads conducted their daily lives in the anger mode. I told my late husband not be so intense and angry you will die as a young man.I would watch my husband become so angry that his blood pressure would go through the roof! He died in Aug 2006 at the age of 53 years old.I was a young widow at the age of 48. He would get mad cause I was calm do not fly off the handle.Husband and son got into a fight physical over a bar of soap.

[kathy434]

I am so sorry that your husband died too early in his life.  I hope that your son now realizes that out of control anger will shorten his life, and it shortens the quality of his life even more.  A bar of soap.  My oh my.  Your son has learned that anger from his father.  I hope you are able to help him to relearn a healthier way of life.  Pick his battles.  Most things aren't worth giving second thoughts to, much less getting upset about.
I found the Rotary International Four-Way Test an excellent guide for me to live by.
"Of things we think, say or do:
1.  Is it the TRUTH?
2.  Is it FAIR to all concerned?
3.  Will it build GOOD WILL and  BETTER FRIENDSHIPS?
4.  Will it be BENEFICIAL to all concerned?"

I think every person could consider these questions in their daily lives, business dealings, government decisions, healthcare choices for society, schools, churches.              K

[verlyn2]

I really love that we do need to ask ourselves those questions daily.I have Cats/kittens that love to walk,set,lay across my laptop when I am working What should I do lock them up? Verlyn2 ,  the male cat is lying down down on my pc now I spank them it doesnt help.They want my attention all the time.I guess I have spoiled him huh? I have online classes.That starts this week and get the fleas that the out door cats brought in the in house kittens have them not.I look like I have the chicken pox and I feel awlful

[kathy434]

We have cats too.  I have always lived with cats.  In the warmer, higher humidity, spring and summers, fleas breed, lay eggs, and larvae hatch and grow into adult fleas.  Some years it is worse than others.  This year it is bad.
I researched the best cat Flea and Tick medication through the internet.  I came away with Frontline Plus For Cats.  It attacks all.  It is expensive.  It is a 3 month supply per cat, or to get started a one month supply for three cats.  It must be reapplied every month.  Each is a tube of premeasured medication that is applied to the back of the cat's head-neck area, where the cat cannot lick it.  Over a few days the medication spreads itself throughout the cat's fur.  I think my husband bought it online at www.PetShed.com. (our cheapest choice).  It is delievered via mail.
Next you must thoroughly vacuum your entire home and furniture frequently to suck up eggs and larvae.  If you don't, eggs can keep the cycle going.  Also, eggs can go dormant over the cold winter, if you live in a cold area.  Eggs can survive several years, infact.
We found a flea infestation in our basement.  So we bought a spectricide at Walmart and followed the directions.  It also can kill silverfish, cochroaches, spiders, on contact.
The cats have responded well to this medication, and it is approved by veteranians.
My cats love to be around us, as family.  Cats are very social animals.  Our cats love to be talked to, held, petted, lap cats, but like the floors as well..  They don't wander far from the house, spending most of their time on our porch or their beds in the flower garden.
Because they are such social animals, they like to sleep on the computer desk while one of us is working there, or on the Boom Box underneath.  Or they just come onto our lap long enough to get a hug, petting, talking to, and maybe curl up for 10 minutes.  Then they are on their way doing kitty stuff.  I never spank or yell at my cats.  If they are persistant about doing something they shouldn't , I speak sharply to them and they know by my voice they need to leave.
What are you studying via computer?
Also.  Fleas can cause Tapeworms in your cats, because fleas ingest the worms and cats swallow the fleas as they bathe.  I have only experienced this twice in my life.  But I don't want to see this again.  
Also if you live in a Lymes Disease area, you want your cats to have the Front Line Medication that also keeps ticks off that carry Lymes Disease.  Animals as well as humans can get Lymes Disease from deer ticks.  They are carried on Mice, Birds, Deer, Dogs, Cats, and wild animals.  Your animals and humans can get very sick from deer tick bites.  It is treated immediately with Antibiotics.  But if left untreated, Lymes can strike any organ in your body (heart, brain, muscles, bones, anywhere) and it cannot be cured by then.
Enjoy your cats.  They keep your blood pressure down and they are good company.    K