SOMEONE PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT I SHOULD DO.MY 14 YEAR OLD DAUHGTER HAS A ANGER PROBLEM THAT IS HORRIBLE.AND HAS A HUGE PROBLEM WHEN I YELL AT HER.BUT HER BEHAVOIR IS GETTIN WORSE AND I HAVE CALLED THE POLICE FOR HER THREATNING TO HRM HERSELF.SHE IS VERY FEARFUL AND WONT SLEEP IN HER ROOM ALONE.SHE SLEEPS WITH KNIVES OR A HAMMER RIGHT BESIDE HER.HER SISTER IS AFRAID TO SHARE A ROOM WITH HER BECAUSE SHE THINKS'S HER SISTER MAY WAKE UP AND HARM HER THINKING SHE IS SOMEONE AFTER HER.SHE IS THE OLDEST OUT OF MY 3 CHILDREN AND WE CANT LEAVE HER IN CHARGE TO BABYSIT.ONCE MY HUBAND AND I LEFT FOR A FEW HOUR TO SEE A MOVIE AND WHEN WE RETURNED THEIR WERE POLICE THERE BECAUSE SHE CALLED THEM SAYING SOMEONE HAD BROKEN IN THE HOUSE WHEN IN ACTUALLITY NOTHING EVER HAPPENED.SHE'S AFRAID TO GO TO THE BATHROOM AT NIGHT SO SHE URINATES IN BOTTLES AND I FIND THEM UNDER HER BED AND SHE LIES ABOUT IT ALONG WITH OTHER THINGS SHE LIES ABOUT.I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO.I'VE TAKEN HER TO A MENTAL DOCTOR AND SHE PRESENTS HER SELF AS A NORMAL TEEN SO THE DOCTOR DOSENT FEEL SHE NEEDS MEDS>WHAT SHOULD I DO?
First, I am so sorry this is happening to your family. How long has this been going on? Has anything happened to her to make her so fearful? Does she ever have moments when she talks to you and tells you what is going on? Sorry so many questions. Regardless, as a parent, I would seek another dr. that is willing (psychiatrist) to listen to us as a family and then help her. She is only 14 (thank goodness) and you still have a little time to diagnose what is going on and get her help. When she gets to 18, it will be very difficult without her accepting the help. Please keep us updated and I am wishing you the very best. Bless her heart and yours.
It sounds as if she is really upset by something that has happened in her life, how long has this been going on ,. What is she like at school are there problems there ? Could there be any bullying going on .Yelling will not help her,I think you need to speak to the doctor again and ask for some counseling ..good luck
Thanks for the support.This has been going on I would say for the last three years but have gotten worse over the last year. Nothing traumatic has ever happened to her as far as any abuse in her life,and I have always tried to be the best mom to her.The one thing in her life that has changed over the past few years is her bio dad being incarserated. I know that hurts her because they were close.we have since moved to a new state and I have gotten married. My other children are very close to there new stepdad and have adjusted fine to everything except her. My husband has tried many times to also build a bond with her but she refuses. I can understand her pain with all the new changes but I can't understand her behavoir and why she's so disrespectful to me.and the reason she is so fearful of everything! I feel like I'm at a lost because I can't understand her.
Thanks for responding. She has told me once about kids saying mean things to her at school so bullying could be a possibility.She. Is angry a lot and expresses that she is differant.about six mos ago I had a mother daughter day just her and I and asked her some questions about what was going on in her life and she told me she was a bit confused about her sexuality. At that point I told her I would love and support her no matter what.so I'm thinking that may play a huge role in her anger and behavoir. She is not your typical teen she is not into dating and only has one friend that she hangs out with.when I look at her my heart feels pain because she is like a brick wall that I can't seem to get through.
This age is so confusing. It doesn't take much for her to really worry and have a lot held inside. I really do think it is important to take her to a counselor to talk to. Someone who really connects with kids. I took my son when he was that age and I really found out a lot. Some I really didn't want to hear but I was really glad I did. It toltally changed our relationship and he became much more open. I am a good mom but I was told I was too good a mom. In our situation, I had to back up and give him space. Regardless of what the problems may be I do know that you can help her now at this age because when they get closer to 17-18 it becomes their choice by law. Get your relationship back on track now. My son is getting ready to graduate and he has turned out to be a confident kid. So it is possible to make all of this better! Goodluck to you and her!
Hi. There are a couple of things here that concern me--- the urinating in bottles for one. Could she be suffering paranoia? Perhaps.
I must ask about the dynamics of the home. Is it volatile? That is something to factor in because temper problems are often a 'family' issue with the adults not knowing how to manage their emotions in an appropriate way themselves. Not saying that is you---- but this is definately common. Then there is a focus on teaching this young girl to express her emotions and to handle her anger would be the goal,
However, you've written enough that I would strongly suggest that she begin seeing a psychologist that specializes in adolescents.
I do feel like just from what you've written that a bit more than normal teenage stuff is going on. I think talking to someone would be helpful and if her emotional state warrents, further treatment would follow.
Many kids who are depressed will threaten in this way. And not to scare you but schizophrenia has an onset in the teen years. Mental health issues are due to brain chemistry and no one's fault. So, again---- just to be safe, make sure this isn't going on with professionals that this is their specialty and then if it is not, deal with it situationally.
I would go to another mental health professional, preferably a child/adolescent psychiatrist. And if they don't listen go to another one. Keep going until someone hears you. Tell them things like she sleeps with knives and hammers, her siblings are scared of her, she is urinating in bottles at night time. If you can take a video of her sleeping with the knives, finding the bottles of urine, etc. that may help.
I don't know if she needs medication but she definently needs therapy. She must be miserable. No one wants to live like that. She sounds paranoid. Sleeping with hammers and knives is not a good sign, and her siblings may be right to be concerned.
There is a 'mood disorder' professional on the doctor forum. I would post this question to him. He does it free of charge so it won't cost you like many of the other forums. He does only take one question a day though.
If she is developing something like psychosis there are a lot of good medications out there for that now. She doesn't sound like she has an anger issue, she sounds like she has a mental illness.
thanks everyone for your helpful insight..i now have some answers and know what direction to take.i am still expieriancing the same difficult problems with my daughter.her mood is up and down alot>im searching for the right doctor that can help us through this difficult time
I wish you the very best! I tell my kids we can get through anything because you are loved so very much. This age is so difficult and confusing for everyone. You are on the right track and ((hugs)) coming your way.
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