from anorexia to binge eating

hi my name is laura. i used to be anorexic, about a year ago. i was 5 foot 5, just under 100 lbs. i got help before i got too much worse. i started seeing a psychologist and was also diagnosed with depression. however, i stopped going to my appointments and stopped taking the medication for depression. anyhow, i did get up to a healthy weight, 112. i allowed myself to eat all the foods i hadnt before. but then i felt fat so i started to lose weight again, getting down to 106 just recently, and now i am actually at a healthy weight, back to 111. the only problem is that i know i have been binging and i have not been able to stop. i used to count calories religiously and now i am so worried because it doesnt concern me as much anymore. i think i ate 3000 calories today at least, and a couple of other days too. i eat until i am past full, but i never try to excercize it off anymore. i keep saying i will go back to my old diet tomorrow.i know i am at a healthy weight now, but i feel fat and my pants are too tight now an my stomach always feels bloated. i am afraid that i will just continue to gain weight if i keep this up. i dont know what is wrong with me but i cant stop eating so much. i know i shouldnt but i cant stop myself even when i am on my fourth bowl of cereal. i think i have a problem. can you please give me some advice? is this common to switch from anorexia to binge eating?

[Patricia Pitts, PhD]

Hi.  I just read the blogging exchange.  I'm a psychologist with 28 years of experience treating eating disorders.  It does sound you are going towards bingeing and the potential of possibly purging to compensate for the bingeing with vomiting, laxatives, exercising, etc.  Your eating disorder is just taking another form.  Seeking a psychotherapy, possibly a treatment team or treatment program would be helpful at this point.  To learn more about treatment options visit the bella vita website.  Best, Dr Patricia Pitts The Bella Vita Los Angeles, CA and Woodland Hills, CA

[GrnEyes777]

I think it is fairly common to transition into binge eating. It doesn't sound like you're purging yet so thats good. this same thing happened to me. I was anorexic for about a yr and once I started binging and purging, that lasted about 5 yrs. Try to change these behaviors before you start purging because it sounds like you're on your way to that and I can tell you that bulimia causes serious long-term damage. At least you admit that you're at a healthy weight. It's just changing how you look at yourself in the mirror. The reason you feel bloated all the time is because of the binging. Drink lots of water, get back on track with excercising and hopefully that will get you eating right again. It really helps to speak with a therapist who specializes in body image issues.

[shlee1016]

Yes, it is very common to switch from starving yourself, to overeating. It's most definitely not unheard of. In a way, it's like you have deprived yourself for so long that you are in a sense "making up for it." It's not like it's on purpose or anything, and there's certainly more to it than that, way more, but make sense right? Anyway, do you have a meal plan? Are you in therapy or do you have a treatment team of any kind? I think that could help you if you don't, maybe a whole lot. I'm happy to talk to you as much as you'd like and will do anything I can to help. Feel free to message me anytime also. Hang in there. I know how hard this is.

Ashley

[darkspec]

Thanks for your comments.. i feel better knowing im not alone, though i cant find many support groups websites for this. i actually used to excersize regularly and plan my meals and eat a decent amount of calories. but i think subconsciously my body just wanted more food in case i starved myself again. i feel like its either one extreme or the other, but the reason why i started restricting in the first place was because i had trouble controlling what i ate. i feel like i'll always have an eating disorder, i dont have therapy. i tried to solve the problem myself. but its much deeper than food.

[GrnEyes777]

It's definitely deeper than food! For me, it was a total control issue. I didn't have control over my life, but I could control my weight. It took yrs, of course, to have this realization. I thought it was about the food and my weight for the longest time. But once I realized that, I started taking steps to have more control over other aspects of my life. That helped immensely, to not feel helpless. The most important thing is to be ok with who you are. I know its a cliche but self-confidence starts on the inside by loving yourself and being kind to yourself everyday. Part of that is being healthy and treating your body well. Its also extremely important to have support systems and not date people who are weight obsessive themselves. i can relate to feeling like you'll always have this, but it doesn't have to be that way. I have been recovered for a few yrs and I feel pretty straight. I don't see myself ever going back to that. I have a genuine desire to be healthy and to treat my body with care. Its hard to not get on my weight sometimes but I want to live a long life!