how can you have it?

[sweetmalis]

How can you possibly have anorexia if you do try to eat and do want to eat but when you do, you become sick either with diarrhea or vomiting so sometimes you won't to avoid this but overall you want to get better and have even gone as far as smoking marijuana to try to eat without pain but that doesn't always work either....so how can you have it?

[Rach878]

Of corse keep me updated. I understand what your saying about treatment. I myself have been putting off going for the past 5 months because of school, so i understand. You'll always find reasons to not go, i'm starting to realize that for myself, but sometimes weather it'sconvient or not, you have to.
Have a great Easter, and keep me in the loop.

[Rach878]

First i'll tell you the treatment centers they show on TV and actual treatment center, are two very different things. i was admitted last summer, and it's nothing like what you think. We had art projects, games, open converstaion, walks, the staff was very nice. I mean there not all creepy like you see on TV.
How long has it been that you can't eat? It must be awhile for those things to start happening to your body. i know that you physically sick, and that it's not an eating disorder, but a treatment center still might be able to help you. They have medical doctors at treartmen centers, and they would monitor how much your eating, so that your medical issues get resolved.
Did you make clear to your doctors that you want to eat, but that there'ssomething causing you to not be able to, like maybe the ulcers, and stress. Have they mentioned any form of treatment for those two things. If those two things were fixed, maybe you could eat again.

[Patricia Pitts, PhD]

Hi.  I am a psychologist specializing in eating disorders for 28 years.  I just read the stream of blogging.  It sounds like the doctors did diagnosis you anorexia.  Often there are medical and psychological co-occurring disorders that accompany anorexia.  I understand that you would like to get things in order before seeking eating disorder treatment.  As you know there is never a good time for our lives to be inconvenienced.  However, eating disorders are life threatening, especially when you speak of electrolyte imbalances and wasting (body eating itself).  Inpatient and residential treatment centers 24/7 care and partial hospitalization (day treatment/live at home) programs are available.  I do not know where you live.  There may be a good, solid treatment program close to your home.  Seeking care is important, sooner than later.  To learn more about treatment options visit the bella vita website.  I'd be happy to speak with you directly if you go through the contact section on the bella vita website.  Best, Dr Patricia Pitts  The Bella Vita  Los Angeles, CA and Woodland Hills, CA.

[Rach878]

Slow down just a little. Who told you you were anorexic?
If you want to eat and are hungry but get involentarily sick after eating, maybe there's something medically wrong. have you seen your doctor?

[sweetmalis]

did any docs get a chance to read my first post????

[sweetmalis]

Thanks again..everything helps..I actually would welcome some kind of treatment at this point but I am scared to do anything as an in-patient type situation right at the moment. I need to be home to work on some marital issues and then of course issues with my daughter that leaving her right now, even though in the long run it would be helpful, I just don't see it as a possibility...so I'm just trying to figure out a way to handle "this" whatever "it" is and be healthy enough so when things get more settled at home I could look into something more intense as far as psychological treatment goes..I mean there is always going to be a part of everyone that once they lose weight no matter who they are, and of course people always have to tell how much better you look smaller, that you will always have that fear of getting "big" again...but not starving for it..ever.And like you said there is something medical behind this..definetely...its been going on for too long and I think Doctors just look at these symptons as stress related and pass them by without considering the fact that there may be more lurking behind there...so for more tests I will go and will keep anyone and yourself posted if you like to let you know what I find out...in the meantime good luck with your own health and take care of it...for some reason we don't seem to value it or ourselves the way we should and we end up here..bodies hurting..broken..but its good to help and to get help so thank-you and good luck to you

[sweetmalis]

Hey and yes, I have seen not only my gastro doc who tells me I have ulcers and the rest is just stress related, my regular doctor is the one more concerned due to testing that they have found my potassium levels way off, my ketones(can't spell) off, and that anemia and a slight yellow tinge to my skin color. That and the fact that I'm no longer losing "good" fat but rather my body seems to be feeding on itselft at this point..and it was when I had been at the ER twice in the past month for dehydration that both docs said I should admit myself for anorexia..but I just can't...not when I have seen way too many shows when they bring you inside these treatment facilities and I would not get well there..it is like you said..I just need to find the right doctor who is going to take the time to listen to all the symptons...all the stuff that goes with them...and wants to go from there....but thanks for the concern