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Afraid of being sick(ill)

by Alex_123, Feb 13, 2008 08:36PM
I'm always afraid that I'm sick of something, it started this summer in august, first I thought I contracted AIDS, then I thought I will have rabies, then I really had mononucleosis (which worsened my fears because this time I was really sick), after that I had the fear that I was going mad (and I was feeling pretty strange and I was feeling anger too), then I thought I had Hodgins Disease (as a complication of mononucleosis), now after eating some cow meat a think that I could probably have contracted VCJD in the past (human mad cow disease) of course in corelation with my past strange feeling and anger symptoms (depression and mood swing is one of the symptoms of human mad cow disease)...
Thats about it... the problem is that I CAN NOT STOP thinking that I am ill of something... and that is really bothering me... and it is affecting my day to day life... because for example when I started thinking that I had mad cow disease right the next day I started feeling strange and angry like I wasn't myself anymore...( as a symptom of the disease ofcourse)... I know that my brain is producing all the symptoms but I can not get rid of the question: "What if the symptoms are real?"... and this question is coming over and over again in my head...
Please give me some advice...  
Member Comments (9)

by Jennifer375, Feb 13, 2008 09:50PM
To: Alex
You really need to talk to somone and get a refferal to see a trained psychologist, your symptoms sound like yes its having a seriouse impact on your mental wellbeing. There may be medications that can help calm the worrying, but a psychologist can help you get to the root of whats got you so focused on these negative fears. I do wish you well, but you need physical help there right now.. please talk to somone close to you about what your going through...

*with blessings of peace*   Jennifer

by TriggerCat, Feb 13, 2008 11:46PM
I'm experiencing the same exact thing right now.
It's possibly from my PTSD, which I'd rather not attribute
every illness (cold/flu) I get to that.
Are you possibly going through something similar?

by budjaz, Feb 14, 2008 12:39AM
To: Alex and TriggerCat
definitely could be PTSD.. my brother died in his sleep in May of 2007 and ever since then every stinking day I think I am going to die in my sleep of something.. every ache,  everything I look up online to try to diagnose myself..   constantly afraid of dying... it is so annoying and no matter what I cannot escape it.. tried the lexapro but I couldn't stand the sexual side-effects =)... trying to work it out on my own but it is almost a year and not getting anywhere.. good luck to you.. maybe once  you have found the source you will be able to control it...

by something, May 27, 2008 03:46PM
To: Alex_123
for me happening exactly the same, everythiong started from last March. At first I have found two lumps under my jaw, which I need to pick up carefully in other ways not doctors could not find them, Then I thought I contracted AIDS- I went for tests in AIDS centre and all came back negative...After that I started to think that I have got Hodgins disease-cancer, after lyphoma, after leukemia, accute, chronic leukemia, I done hundreds of test and noone find anything. I even went to my doctor -psychiatrist and was drinking medcine from depression, anxiaty for two months. After I stoped. My recent worries was - lung cancer, now  I started to think about thick borne encephalytis, I was in turkey touced the stray cat, and now I am thinking I contracted RABIES. Even I was not bitten, scrached or so, I even did not handle the cat, I just touched her fur....Not to mention I was checking myself for skin cancer in hospitals.DOctors do not know what to do with me...It is lasting for two years-this anxiety, Pain enywhere- cancer...etc... I think about starting my new aNXIETY DEPPRESION TREATMENTS with my psychiatrist..as my condition is horrible. I think It is because previously I was using ectasy pills and amphetamine every weeken , now I have stopped and do not use for one year or so,, but I can tell You DRUGS- ARE NOT FUN! It damages my psychology for all my life!

by sumihari, May 27, 2008 04:09PM
To: Alex and something
Hi there,

Don't worry too much, you are normal, just have health anxiety , hypochondriasis . It is like OCD because the obsessive thoughts like "you could have this disease" etc really is very upsetting and makes life rather miserable for some. Whether the disorder is classified as an OCD or not really depends on the doctor/therapist.

As for treatment, it is apparently quite challenging, best results are seen working with our thoughts ie in changing our thinking with the help of a good therapist. Medication alone is not found to be helpful, medication is usually used as an adjunct to help people settle down a bit so they can pracise any therapies. You also need to find a good doctor  to work with too in terms of what symptoms are really serious and what not. So aim to develop a good patient/doctor relationship. We may sometimes think we are so smart as we know so much about various diseases but in reality we just overloaded our brains with irrelevant information. So don't try to be a doctor and torture yourself to try and narrow down what illness you could have and then tell your doctor what tests you would like. Instead go to the doctor and tell him your symptoms and ask him/her to do a general check up if necessary.

I am have health anxiety and GAD and panic. I am getting better every day now and it is due to therapy. I know days when I had severe health anxiety and when I didn't sleep well, I think for 2 hours . I woke up feeling tense so I thought I was going to die from a stroke or heart attack. Then mid morning after browsing the internet on sleep disorders, I really thought I had fatal familial insomnia and wanted my doctor to do some genetic tests. Then late afternoon, I thought I had depression and MS, then by late evening I was so stressed from tiredness and worry thought cardiovascular event. Fortunately at the end of the day, I realised that I didn't have all that diseases but was just a hypochondriac.  

I have just started therapy with a new therapist, the previous therapist was useless, I got worse. Now though I have had only 4 sessions, I feel much better. So there is hope for you too, but first you need to seek help.

Sumi

by something, May 27, 2008 04:20PM
To: sumihari
Hi, Sumihari, thank You for reply, it drives me mad-believe me..The thing is I always consult my doctor and do general check ups with my health I have done TONES of tests, I went to all doctors was searching for tumors and all the kind of stuff...And always nothing! all I need to do just to check any illness through internet- and I am ill.! I am almostly becoming a doctor as I have read about each illness throughly... It is like circle-jumping from one illness to another- do not know how to stop it. My mother is confused she took me to many psychatrists., my boyfriend is angry- he do not talk with me about my fears anymore..sometimes I feel lonely and locked in my own world. AS soon as I talk with someone I fell better...but after sometime it happenes again...I have a greater fear to die...

by sumihari, May 27, 2008 04:52PM
To: something
Hi something,

I am not sure how how old you are but I am in my mid forties and I suffered GAD from my early 30's due to various stressors in life. I was never on medication , just CBT with an excellent psychiatrist and I was okay until my early forties when I had a health scare. That is when my hypochondriasis began.

So I understand how you must be feeling, it is awful, it is like you are totally consumed by this black fog of doom and gloom and intense irrational fear. Your energy levels are low as your mind is just in a lock with these irrational fears. And yes it is difficult to stop it by your self. It is a serious obsession/preoccupation.

First step, go back to your doctor, ask him whether he thinks you could possibly suffer from health anxiety(hypochondriasis). This is a form of generalised anxiety disorder and as I mentioned can cross over to be classified as OCD because of the obsessive thoughts and constant though that something bad will happen. Then ask your doctor for a referral to see a mental health professional who is specialised in treating anxiety disorders.

Sumi

by something, May 27, 2008 04:59PM
To: sumihari
I am 22years old woman, I have been treated and many tests have been done on me back in my homecountry-I am from Lithuania- I have been admitted to health anxiety, panic attackes, fear to die, have been on medication- stopped it and now I will go back to my GP in UK, and ask for mental health professional as You have sugessted for me. It really is horrible. For example for a past two days I have been thinking I have contracted rabies, I read about it and I am 100 percent sure I have it..It is horrible!

by suzi-q, May 27, 2008 05:14PM
To: alex
Please read my response to Something on her post....I hope it helps!
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