Angoraphobia

Hi,
I was in an automobile accident 4 years ago. I was struck in the face which took my nose and left side of face loose (hope I'm not being too graphic) and gave me a major concussion. After four surgeries, they were able to put me back together fairly close. I have no memory of the accident, only waking up a week later with a unfamiliar nurse standing over me.

Since this has happened, I have slowly, but progressively, picked up some bad habits. That seem to be getting worse, instead of better. These "bad habits" include some OCD symptoms... some things have to be done in a specific way and order or I get extremely annoyed almost to the point of anger. Another is, simply, a fear of people. I can't go to public places, such as grocery stores, without becoming extremely stressed. People getting close to me causes me a lot of anxiety. The only exception to the rule is my wife. As long as she's with me, I am able to handle crowds/people a little better. I'm lucky with work in that I work in the IT field and am able to telecommute several days a week and only have to face coworkers two times a week and have made a habit of getting most coworkers to email me, instead of call (for some reason I can email with folks with no problem at all). I have been able to live with this but am now feeling myself become anxious being around my family (Mother/Father/etc.) as well. In addition, depression is starting to get to me.

My wife talked me into seeing a neurologist. On the first visit he said I had post traumatic stress and placed me on Amitriptyline and Chlordiazepoxide. I've took those for a month and the only differences I've felt was constantly sleepy. I went for a follow up visit today and he says he believes what has happened is that I've developed Angoraphobia as a results of the stress. He has took me off of the two drugs and put me on Nortriptyline. He also suggested I see a therapist.

The idea of seeing a therapist makes me feel pretty anxious in itself. I pretty much have to have my wife in the room with me to almost act as an 'interpreter' with the neurologist, so I surely can't see myself going and talking to a therapist. Kind of a 'catch 22' situation. :)

So, can you offer any opinions/suggestions?

Thanks.

[dmbfan07cb]

I can relate to this too actually.  My panic attacks and anxiety didn't become really bad untill I had a bad car accident.  I was actually thrown from the vehicles rear window.  Hit a light pole at about 65 in the rain and it slung around and the seat came off the hinge and i Just ejected out.  This is all according to a witness.  If I wouldn't have been ejected it would have killed me.  The only thing keeping me through my panic attacks and agorophobia is hat God has a purpose for me.  He kept me alive for a reason.  I just don't know what yet.  I will say the only thing that ever helped my Agorophobia was prozac.  I hope you start getting better, I know how tuff it is.

[nursegirl6572]

Agoraphobia is a REALITY of anxiety disorders.  I have TOTALLY been where you are, and while it takes a bit of work starting out on a scary new road...you can do it.  Even if that means your wife has to go with you to your initial appts.  You are avoiding more and more things...which is how the cycle progresses....the time to intervene is NOW!

And honestly?  Unless you have some medical condition you didn't mention, you do not need to see a neurologist.  If you have ever seen a psychiatrist before, start there.  If not, start with your PCP.  You may need a combination of medications and therapy.  A common form of therapy for agoraphobics is CBT or "cognitive behavior therapy", where you basically learn to re-program the way you think....it is a form of deconditioning.  Any of those things may be a great start for you.  But you have to start SOMEWHERE.  Be honest with your wife about it, it sounds like she is very supportive, that's great.  You will start "needing" her less and less once you get on the right path.

There are MANY MANY MANY of us who have been in your shoes and learned to walk out of them, believe me.  You won't be a prisoner in your own home forever.  Keep posting here, too...the support is priceless.

Lastly, read up on agoraphobia....understanding is power.

Best of luck to you....

[barfer]

Well, where do I start....A car accident did a real number on me a while back, so I know where you are coming from.  Going to the psychiatrist was an interesting experience too.  My husband had to drive me the first couple of times, mind you he sat in the waiting room for me, but I knew he was only a wall away.  It took me weeks to open up to the psychiatrist...the first visit I basically just sat there and answered yes or no to all the questions...I don't think either of us got a thing out of it BUT eventually, I started to feel more comfortable and at least I was able to open up enough to get something out of our sessions.  I saw him every Tuesday morning for a year and a half.  He helped me initially with the CBT and that got me started with my own method of that which I continue doing to this day.  As far as the drugs are concerned, the combination of CBT and drug therapy is probably a really good thing for you right now provided you are on medication that is right for you.  Agoraphobia is something I struggle with but make sure that I work on every single day and it is SO WORTH IT.  Most people would never know that I have this problem because I was willing to put in the work... and it is work.  If you want your life back, then you've got to commit to doing everything possible to make it happen.  Go to the the shrink, do the CBT, take the drugs if need be,and you will, if you commit 100% you will feel better.  Keep a positive outlook.  I'm guessing, but the little bit of depression that you are feeling may really be because of the agoraphobia.  If you didn't have that, maybe you wouldn't feel depressed.  That was the case for me...I'm no doctor, but it might be the case for you too.  So, work on getting out of the house, even if it is for a walk around the block with your wife, do it every day.  Then add something more to it like, go to the store and stay for 10 minutes, then do it every day and increase the time.  I don't care what it is you do, as long as you do it.  You don't have to do things in giant leaps, small steps will do, but repetition really helps.  I live in a condo now, the first few weeks I took the stairs because I was sure that with my luck the elevator would break down and they would never find me.  Now I never take the stairs...my cardio is suffering because of it but at least my mental health isn't.  Tony, I'm not going to kid you that this is easy, it isn't but with determination, you will be successful.

P.S.  I always rewarded myself when I did something I really thought I would never be able to do.  After a while I had to stop doing that because my reward was generally in the way of food, particularly cinnamon buns....but a reward at the beginning of therapy is never a bad idea.