Anxiety & Opiates.

I'm 18 and for a few years I have suffered from severe anxiety and depression.. which i think the depression comes from the anxiety since that's what stops me from doing what i want to do in life. This article really makes me feel less alone, i relate so much.
I'm young but i've never liked drinking, smoking pot, etc.. but realized the one thing i really liked were opiates, i would abuse them through high school and off and on for the last 2 or 3 years.. but i never felt addicted. I just loved feeling myself for once and everything was so much better. Currently i'm on xanax ER & xanax IR, they help with the physical effects of anxiety but never get me out of this slump i'm in. Moving on, my step mother is prescribed to a VERY strong opiate, 10 mg oxymorphones.. i started taking them to get a high at first but then came to realize how they made my anxiety/depression DISSAPEAR. The problem i'm having is, i have felt the withdrawals from abusing these pills, but i have good self control and i know i can get through thay. Plus it helps that i'm not someone who's looking to get "****** up" all the time. My big question is, if i was to use very small amounts of the opiate to get through only my toughest anxiety attacks, which come at around this time (starting college , looking for a job) and other big events, then weaned myself off after i felt more comfortable with everything, would that be ok? like i said, i'm not looking to get messed up and i have very good self control.
sorry for such a long post & thanks SO much.

[Paxiled]

If depression is your main problem, not anxiety, opiates and benzos and relaxant herbs will help with anxiety but can make depression worse by sedating you.  Do you have a psychiatrist?  A therapist?  A naturopath?  Some expert to consult with so you stop self-medicating with drugs that are working against you?  And will end up addicting you?

[Nysff]

Vicki I can TOTALLY Understand where you are right now.
I AM Prescribed Pain medication and have been for almost 9 years now.

The Only problem I see here is
1.) What if you really do need them one day and your body is so used to them that they may not work.
2.) What happens if you take something you shouldn't while on these drugs and your mother gets in trouble for supplying them to you 'Even is she is unaware or not".

Yes these Pain killers can ease pain and worries, Although i dont take something that strong, I have noticed that they do also ease my anxiety here and there.

Just think about it, Your to young to get addicted to pain killers. Although even myself tells everyone that there is no addiction, Technically speaking you are when you have to go through withdrawl (withdrawal).

If I can be of any help, feel free to contact me

[VickiCrews]

I am trying my best to see a therapist of some sort, before it gets bad, like you said.

From what I have read, I know now that i just want to get off them and take care of my problems the right way.

My question is, shouldn't I wean myself off? Most will answer this saying no that doesn't work, you just have to quit cold turkey. If i weaned myself off slowly I wouldn't have to go through the severe withdrawals and anxiety from quitting cold turkey.
And isn't that how they get the people who are prescribed off of them anyways?

[Paxiled]

No, ask an expert on addiction.  First, you might not be addicted yet.  I would say yes, you should wean off, but many clinics do cold turkey, so I don't know.  You might want to ask Dr. Gould on the mental health forum when he returns from vacation, or speak with an addiction counselor who will know more.