Anxiety with severe irritability.

[Quiettype]

I am new here, and never speak about my anxiety. Xanax is my secret. I have always been a very normal happy person, and never had a problem with anxiety or not having to take xanax while I was pregnant...in other words. I am responsible with the drug as I have seen the affects of the abuse! Recently though my husband lost his leg in an accident, he was the sole provider of my family of 4 (two babies) I have been taking care of him, and cannot work. Various other problems!!!all new--I have had my perscription upped to 4 mg a day. I understand this is alot, but other types of medicines have not worked as well.  I am becoming incredibly irrited with life, I assume this is natural as it went from dreamy to nightmarish...my questions are is this incredible anxiety coming from the incresed "need" for the drug...It seems to only last for an hour or two. therefore I turn to more to be a "mellow" mama, as my children should not feel the stress we are from bills, etc. what can I do to relieve the irritablity..I am not depressed. Welbutrin was NOT for me!  I seem to just need a quick fix to the anxiety attack--but am embarressed to admit that I have been using the xanax to relieve irritability as well. Is this bad, and what should I do? Any suggestions are welcome.

[nursegirl6572]

First and foremost....do NOT suffer with this in silence!  Even without all of your tragic new circumstances....just even anxiety WITHOUT all of that other stuff is common, and there is absolutely NO shame in either having it...or being treated for it.  None whatsoever.  I also often "suffer in silence"...and when I really think about it...it's silly.  My loved ones WANT to help me.

For you....my advice is to positively seek some professional help...namely thru a psychiatrist.  The Xanax is no longer effective b/c you have built a tolerance to it...and the dose you're on is already quite high....therefore, there isn't any more room to work with.  There are much better options out there for you.  You say you're not depressed, and you may not be...but do not rule out that an anti-depressant med wouldn't benefit you.  Just keep an open mind about all of your options.  There are other benzodiazepines that are longer-acting and do not have the tolerance issue that Xanax does.  Klonopin is a commonly prescribed one, and also Valium.

But basically...you need to be evaluated so that you and the doc can come up with a treatment plan that works for you.  What you are doing now obviously isn't working anymore....and like I said....you have no room with the dose.  Also, PLEASE seriously consider some "talk" therapy...not only to deal with the anxiety...but also to be able to work thru all of these quite significant issues your family is going through.  I cannot imagine how hard it must be.  

Is your husband getting counseling of any sort?  I would think that as a family, you should all be getting some kind of therapy.  Even if the kids seem fine...you better bet that this is affecting them....how could it not?  You all of a sudden have the burden of the world on your shoulders....so you are stressed...and your husband not only has to deal with the loss of a limb, but also I'm sure he feels as though he is letting everyone down.....being that he was the sole provider...and has now changed roles.  That is a BIG thing for someone to go through.  Hopefully HE isn't suffering in silence like you are.

Keep coming around....you will find a wealth of information here about anxiety disorders, and meet a lot of people who can relate so much to living with anxiety.  We're all in a similar boat...and are all here for one another.

Do not be embarassed...tell your husband that you're going to ask your family doc for some referrals for counseling...for you as an individual, and for the family....and talk it through.  Also, have your doc get you to a psychiatrist so you can be properly diagnosed and start getting the right med(s) to treat you.  

Through all of this...remember that there is no magical overnight cure.  It takes time and patience.  But, going into it with an open mind and working it...you'll be in a much better place down the road.

Hang in there.  I'm glad you found your way here.