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Anxiety

So I wanted to know if anyone has ever felt like this before, So this past August I broke up with my boyfriend.  I am done and have moved on.  In that time I have felt like I love being single and love my freedom hanging out with my friends and family.  I am in my 30's and do want to have kids, but I very close to my mother, I feel like if I get back into another relantionship with someone I will have kids and my parent will pass away.  Which gives me such anxiety, this is a new obsessive thought.  So I am in kind of stuck in a rut which is the best way to describe it.  . I am afraid to get married or just have kids because it means the end of my parents.  I am pretty freaked out about this because it is so effecting my life.  I am sad crying all the time, do not feel like I have any energy....I am in therapy.. Does anyone have advice ? ?
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