I got all the treatment, the coping skills, the relaxation techniques, and the medication I need to feel like I'm not living in a hole anymore. Today I began feeling that familiar 'drop of nervousness' in my tummy that is always my first clue that I need to pay attention to something, take care of it, so my nervousness will cease. Today I had 3 seperate triggers hit me: I gave in to fear of rejection so I did not go apply for jobs like I was supposed to, and I was afraid my hubby would be disappointed. Turned out he was okay with it. This afternoon, my (no joke) stark-raving crazy neighbors decided to have a shouting contest with my husband, who was doing nothing to bother them besides making some noise in the street moving some cars around. When I heard the yelling, my tummy 'dropped' again, and I went outside to see if there was any way to insert reason, so they would stop, plus I knew they would call the cops on us, because they do that every time we sneeze over here. Turns out they quit yelling and no cops showed up, so I started to settle down again, and then I find out that my ex-husband (not seen in 19 years) has been harrassing and lying about my son, Zack. I consider this man to be a sperm donor only, and so does Zack, who is 20, and able to decide for himself who he wants in his life. He does not want the sperm-donor. The guy is legally and severely mentally impaired, and I am afraid of him. Zack wants me to contact him one time to just say that he is not welcome in our lives, and that if his harrassive behavior continues, we would press charges. this makes me nervous, but I told Zack I would do it. Any ideas as to how to react better when my tummy drops for some odd reason? I won't tolerate the feeling and I want most to remove the trigger so it no longer bothers me. Thanks, Friends! Blessings for All - Blu
Hi Blu - I know what you mean by the drop of nervousness in your tummy as I get that too. You have a lot of coping skills I can tell from your great posts on this site. The quick one that I found helpful when I feel this 'drop' happen is to take a deep breath into the stomach and hold it there for a few seconds then expel it with a huff (if you know what I mean) imagine your are huffing out the nervousness. Do a couple of rounds of this, its a quick fix for me and stops the feeling getting any worse.
Hope this helps
Hi Blu, Just reading your post it seems that your triggers relate to what is going on in other peoples lives, that being what your husband will think if you do or don't apply for jobs, how your crazy neighbors act which did include your husband and then agreeing to contact the "Sperm donor"
and telling him to leave your adult child alone.
All drama surrounding you can be kept under wraps a bit better with just simple thoughts most times, but practiced daily. A suggestion I use when drama raises its head is that if it does not concern my life or that of a small childs life immediately, can be handled quite capably by the people the drama is happening to.
We can become quite addicted to drama as it adds excitement and sometimes gives us a pseudo purpose to our lives. But sometimes the excitement and other peoples drama only leads to us not taking care of our own feelings and emotions.
I'm sorry that you are going through this. Some of these thing would even make a "non anxious" person anxious. I wouldn't be too hard on yourself. It think now is just the time to utilize all your coping skills. Maybe do some relaxation techniques more often, go for a long walk, take a bath. You will get through this!
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