Can you just stop loving someone

[MixieIsGettingBetter]

I was in a therepy session on sunday...and all of a sudden the theripist asks me a question and i just started balling and saying i didnt love my fiance....all theese emotions just spilled out of me...here is the thing though...i know I love him very much...its just now i cant get that session off my mind...he is not abusive and he is a really awsome guy, and man i would be devestated if we broke up...but all of a sudden i want to run away from him, from therepy from everything....the theripst and my mom and best friend and him all think i still love him and something else is going on...but i cant shake this feeling...please help

[trio99]

just interested to know ,if well I expect your therapy is for anxiety whether its helping , my boyfriend suffers with this wont hug stresses about everything and we have no love life because of his anxiety hes even uptight in bed cant bare being touch when hes upset I cant comfort him and and he wont comfort me when i complain he just says hes not good enough he saw a counciller but i think he denied he was stressed has no hopes or dreams and has stopped wanting to do nice things.Is your therapist helping you i wondered if it will help him if I try to get him to go back ,whether it is helping you .
thanks trio

[396SS]

I have felt like I wanted to just take off and live on some deserted island before too - seriously.  I love my husband to death, but I think it is just a response to stress - fight or flight and you wanna pick flight at that moment you know?  You should definitely discuss the feelings with your therapist.  Just remember it is just a thought you had, you are not acting on it.  You didn't break up with him, so it's just a thought right now and nothing else.  Unfortunately, therapy can suck sometimes, as it isn't all rosy and warm/fuzzy.  You have to explore thoughts you don't want to, but it's perfectly healthy (i'm told by my therapist:) to have thoughts like that that scare you.  You do have to explore the option of do you love or are you "in love" with the person.  it's not a concrete or easy idea to figure out sometimes.  But that's what the therapist will help you do, so trust in them and let yourself be open - just like you are doing!  See, you are actually a good therapy patient.....what's the point if you don't explore things you don't ever want to?

Take care and agreed - follow your heart and what is best for YOU and you'll be okay.

[suzi-q]

Is it possible that you love him, but are not "in love" with him?  You have to do what is right for you and follow your heart.