Cardiac "neurosis"

So, how many other people with health anxiety centered on heart symptoms are there here?  Give a shout out if you are scared of your arrhythmias! :)

I have been "kicked off" the heart board as we obviously aren't welcome there.  My life is a living hell since I started having palpitations 3 years ago.  I was convinced for a long time I was dying and now I just really don't care much if I die anymore - sometimes I would really welcome it to be free of these palpitations.  The only thing I'd regret is my kids growing up without a mom.  I can't even focus on studying for my bar exam I'm taking next month for worrying about the crazy things my heart is doing.  I have NO support as my husband hasn't a clue about the terror palpitations cause.  I can't afford therapy right now and have no insurance.  I also refuse to take antidepressants because I think they're toxic (every time I've taken them I've had blurred vision, felt like vomiting all day long and plus they can cause weight gain).  So, how do you guys cope or do you?  I know it's hard, I have been there and AM there!

[bip]

Why are you kicked off heart board? You gave such good advise.We are all with you... Think postive not negative you have kids you want to be there for them........Try to relax take deep breaths........Try to keep yourself busy... That is what I do.We are here for you.This board everybody works like a team......I hope you feel better.Please carm down Im here for you..

[fearfactor]

Have you seen what has been going on on the heart board?  There are some people over there complaining about people that just have PACs and PVCs and not actual heart disease posting about our anxieties and calling us neurotic and all that stuff.  I am just so sick of people thinking they know what we go through.  They have NO idea.  I wish everybody who bad mouths people with anxiety could have just ONE panic attack in their lives - they would probably run to the nearest mental hospital.  The reason I have been posting on the heart board and not the anxiety one is that over there you are sure to meet up with people who have cardiac anxiety while here it is not as active for one thing and it's not specifically for heart related anxiety.  

Thanks, Bip - I am trying to stay busy, but it's hard to concentrate sometimes when you are distracted!

[bip]

I understand what you are saying.I posted there to and I found this forum and they are  very supported to me.I thought some people on the heart forum was a little mean to me that is why Im here.........People don't know what we are going threw........I live everyday worrying about something and this forum helps out alot cause they know what we are going through.......Don't let them get to you......

[Raine9]

My dr said I have an arrythmia too but he didn't worry about it much so I'm not.  I'm more focused on my lungs right now.  It seems we all have something we are worrying about.  

I've read many posts here and it seems quite a few people are actually concerned about their hearts.  It's a pretty common thing amongst anxiety sufferers.  So you are definitely not alone.  

So how exactly do you get kicked off a board?  People just don't respond to your posts or you literally can't post?  Just wondering.  

Look at it this way, if the people on the heart forum don't take you seriously, maybe that means you probably don't have a real heart problem.  That's good news right?

[fearfactor]

No, they are just rude and give smart-*** answers.  Some of the people (one, mostly) will do things like call you names like "neurotic" when you post about arrhythmia scaring you, which it does a lot of people.  It really doesn't reassure me that there is nothing wrong, because these people aren't doctors and even doctors miss stuff sometimes.

So, what arrhythmia did your doctor say you have?  I have PACs and PVCs.  I started having them 3 years ago and at first they were just a few here and there and now they have gotten a lot more frequent and when they happen, they will happen a few in a row or else a bunch all at one time - like 4 in a minute when they used to just happen once every few hours.  I am concerned the doctors have missed something and I can't go to the doctor now because I don't have insurance.  Plus, they always just dismiss me as "anxious" when I do and offer me medicines like antidepressants I don't think will help me.  It is very frustrating.

[wmac]

Hello, I CAN TOTALLY RELATAE YOU!!! I have pacs, pvcs, svt and nonsustained vtach. I know exactly how you feel and what your going through. I live my everyday centered around my heart issues. I have been to at least 6 ep docs and spoke to two on the phone who just looked at my records, I have had to non sucessfully epstudies. I have had every test known to man. But because they couldnt induce my nsvt they say dont worry. I have lost a bunch of weight because I cut out so many foods because of msg, caffine or chocolate. I also have costochrondiritis which is arthritis in the ribs so I have chest pain almost everyday and it freaks me out wondering if Im heart attack or just the costo. I went on toprol xl two yrs ago and it made my nsvt worse so now im scared to death to take anything I also have low b/p as it is. Im at the end of my rope. I wont go camping or anywhere fun cause im afraid to get to far from a hospital. Even sold our home moved back to town and live on site at my husbands work cause its closer to the hospital and I do regret that cause now we cant afford a house because its booming here. So I live with alot of regret and anger now at my self. I feel im holding my family back from living because im afraid to live. Sometimes im afraid to leave my house and go to work because its really hard to hold your composure when your heart goes off. But because I have a healthy heart and a good ef they say dont worry. ya right..my ep doc wants me to try some other meds now she mentioned flecainide and im like no way! So ya I totally realte to you. we need to chat sometime. wmac

[heartfluttersflyawayplz]

sorry you left the heart forum , you have gave some good advice and enjoyed you on ther , you dont have to leave they can just get over it. we can post what ever we want to on the heart forum, if they dont like it they can not read it. i know how you feel with pac/pvc i have pac, have had since i was 23 am 47 now, they are no fun and very scarey i went through 9 weeks of them non-stop 6-7 a min , my dr changed my meds 3 times and my mom was going through cancer surgery plus my parents live with me so i was also the care taker, so now am in anxiety, i thought i was getting out of it but today has not been good for me, am still not eating good and sick at stomack, today am having the hot/tingling ears/head its not been good for me. so i know how you feel. try not get the anxiety or it will be worse. i have pills but like you dont want or like to take them, am trying so hard not to but after today not sure. hang in there and be like me try and keep busy which today is not helping. barbara

[fearfactor]

Hey!  I will probably still post on the other board but just not about my anxiety.  I don't know why they get so upset; they don't have to look at it if they don't like it!  Wow - you were having PACs 6 or 7 a minute?  I have had that happen but thankfully not for very long.  What kind of medication do you use?

[fearfactor]

Hey - it sounds like we have a lot in common!  I have never had my episodes caught on a monitor, but I think that I have nonsustained v-tach or else strings of PACs.  I definitely have palpitations that are more than one in a row.  It is very frightening to me when it happens.  It is like people tell you to just go on with life but you feel something catastrophic could happen any minute.  Hard to go on and think positive with that going on!

I am married with 2 children and my husband doesn't "get" my heart issues.  He thinks I am just being hysterical.  When this first started happening to me in 2004, I thought for certain I was dying.  He was worried about me until I was told it was "benign" and to go live life.  Now he totally can't understand why it scares me so much.  He has threatened divorce over my anxieties, so I just don't talk to him about it anymore unless it's really bad.  I have stopped doing things, too - like now I won't ride an elevator because I am scared I'll get stuck in there and have an arrhythmia and die without anyone being able to get to me.  I have always feared elevators and closed-in areas but I had gotten over it until I started having these palps.  This keeps me from taking many jobs, because I live in a big city with lots of high-rises and I work in the legal field and a lot of law firms are in those big buildings.  So, I've taken work with a small firm that pays nothing and doesn't treat me very well.  I also don't ride roller coasters and won't get on an airplane.  It is hard to go to work and sit there with your heart going all crazy and just go on with life. I definitely sympathize with you.  

Are you scared about the side effects of the flecainide?  No one has ever offered that to me because they think I have no problems since they're not documented (other than some PACs/PVCs).  They did give me beta blockers but they make me feel dead tired and don't help my palps so I am weaning off them now.  Keep in touch and hang in there!

[mmalo]

I was following some of that stuff over on the heart board.  Not nice at all!  We are all going through the same thing!  It is terrifing.  Sometimes the only calm I would get would be to know that I am not alone with these things.  I also will not fly anymore.  I feel like I'm going crazy.  I don't think anyone should undermine the way these things make you feel.  Hang in.

[Raine9]

Just to answer your question, I can't recall exactly what terms my doc used for my arrythmia.  He wasn't too concerned about it.  So I'm not gonna be, if I fixate on it, it'll just drive me crazy.  Anyway, it seems as though you have a lot of company here.  Take care and best of luck.

[Raine9]

Hey, I found that post in the Heart Forum you were referring to.  Dang, I feel for you.  Sorry you got dragged into that!  I know what you are feeling.  You don't feel sorry for yourself and don't want to take away from those who are already diagnosed with a disease.  But it's that FEAR inside you, that you might have a fatal disease that is so overwhelming and scary!  I don't understand either why some people get so upset.  If you don't want to read the post, then just don't click on it.  It's that easy, nobody is forcing your hand!

Hang in there and take care.   You are always welcome here. :o)

[MAD4]

Hello to All,  

This is my first time posting to this site.  I have experienced severe anxiety, depression, and fibromyalgia for many years.  All the doctors ever say is 'your depressed' and shove me on more meds.  I try to tell them they are putting the horse before the cart!  I got sick and also had some injuries B4 I ended up depressed this time.  All they see is that i'm depressed so they don't look at anything else.  FRUSTRATING!  My anxiety has gotten so bad that I won't leave the house.  I was fired for the first time ever from a VERY good job in April 2007.  I've been looking for work, but am terrified to take another job with the way I feel.  I don't know much about the Fibromyalgia other than what they tell me.  All I know is I feel like I have the flu ALOT!  I guess that's part of it.  There are more days, than not, in a week where I can't get out of bed B4 noon, and i'm supposed to hold down a full time job?  The stress from that and my severe anxiety keep me in constant fear.  I lost my boyfriend of 5 years, i'm about to lose my house, dogs ( my babies! ), and have already lost the respect of my teen-age daughter.  She doesn't understand what i'm going through, and says 'just go get a job'.  UM, gee like I didn't think of that!  :|  Everyone tells me that except my Mother; she knows i'm not making some fake illnesses up.  Anyone else out there with the Anxiety compounded with Fibromyalgia or other disorders?  The doctors have also told me I have 'Borderline Personality Disorder' and 'Bi-Polar'.  What a TREAT!

[Celeste77]

I have been snipped at a few times over there too.
I get so sick of people's insensitive and uncompassionate attitudes.
I sometimes wonder how it is that I stay so nice and understanding to others even when they are more then nasty towards myself or people in similiar circumstances.
I've been dealing/struggling with PVC's/NSVT/IST and Panic/anxiety/GAD for over 20 years now. I also have Hemochromatosis, and was just diagnosed tonight with Celiac Sprue and Diabetes Type 2. I think my plate is full now, thank you very much....but to some, I'm nothing more then an Cardiac Neurotic, I dont think I'll be back over there for awhile.

Just so everyone knows, theres a place on here for suggestions etc. at
http://www.medhelp.org/forums/suggestions/wwwboard.html.

I've already put in an request, and if enough of us sound out, maybe we can get a seperate forum just for arryhthmia's, that way we won't have to deal with the nasty comments and complaining by those that think were nothing more then trivial nuisances and "cardiac neurotics."
Sure, I feel horrible for some of them and the seriousness of their ailments, but I've been suffering too, more then I'd like to admit at times.
Like I've said so many times, it's the unknown that's so terrible.

On a lighter note;
Have any of you seen the movie, "What about Bob"?
That is so me when it comes to my heart! Baby steps! All the way.
I love that movie and laugh everytime I start planning to go camping or on vacation. The first thing I do is check Mapquest for the nearest hospital!
I also have an portable AED (defibrillator), BP monitor, Epipens, and plenty of Aspirin.
I guess I really am neurotic, huh? But seriously, we all have to get to the point that we can start to live again, right? Because I felt so bad for my loved ones, I took on the "Babysteps Mentality" and started pushing myself. So far,  I've gone camping and hiking, jogging, water skiing, swimming, rode the wave runners at 40 miles an hour, drove long distances, made love while in bigeminy, mowed the lawn several times,  jumped on the trampoline, and most importantly, spent quality time with my family and friends.... all the while I was skipping away as usual. I don't care what anyone says, "Bob" was on to something that actually works. ;)

Hoping everyone has a skip free day!

[fearfactor]

Yeah, I feel sort of stupid for letting those people drag me into a catty argument.  It was really not worth it and just gave me bad "karma" - I am sure it did nothing whatsoever to change their attitudes or make them see anyone else's point of view.

"What ABout Bob?" is a funny movie and it does make sense to do "baby steps."  I have really been trying to do that and trying to ignore my heart fears more.  My palpitations have actually gotten better. That is what is so weird about my heart - I will have crazy palps for a week or so and then NOTHING for the longest time.  Don't get me wrong, I love the fact that they're not more frequent, I just wonder what is up that makes my heart go crazy sometimes!  The next thing I am going to work on is conquering my fear of elevators.  It will really be "baby steps" there because I have a big phobia about them!  Maybe I will get my husband to go to a building downtown with me and ride elevators.

I will do what you said about suggesting an arrhythmia forum - that is a good idea!

[cemcem]

Its real interesting to hear about everyone elses experiences.  Sometimes you feel like you're alone with what you're going through and it really sucks.  My symptoms started with slight anxiety grew into panic attacks and paulpitations when I got on medications to treat the anxiety (especially Lexapro @ 10mg ed).  So I stopped the medications totally and still get slight palputations here and there but not as bad.  I wish everyone luck as I know how it feels everyday to be battling these feelings.  Everyone around me seems to be so happy and normal while I zone out constantly trying to control my mind.