Do I have depersonalization disorder?

First off let me start by saying that I posted this question in this forum because I did not see a more appropriate forum. I know that depersonalization disorder if often associated with anxiety, but I do not currently suffer from an abnormal amount of anxiety. Although I used to for years as a young teenager. I am now 18 years old and I am certain I am losing my mind. For about a year and a half now I am CERTAIN this has been going on, although in retrospect I feel like it could have been happening my whole life. I feel as if I'm constantly dreaming, or that I am in a movie, and most consistently, that I am watching myself as a third person. I feel no pain anymore, and these symptoms have become my whole life rather than just something I'd feel momentarily. Before I stumbled across this disorder, I thought I felt this way because I was mistakenly placed on this earth and that I was going to soon die, so my high powers didn't think it was necessary for me to associate with myself any longer. I suffered from emotional abuse and abandonment as a child, and no longer feel upset about it or tear up thinking about it. Also, over the past few months I had been smoking marijuana on a regular basis, and did cocaine and pure MDMA a handful of times. I understand these can cause this feeling, but I am certain that I had less frequent experiences prior to engaging in these drugs. Does this sound like depersonalization disorder? Would you say it's because of my drug use, or my childhood trauma? And if it is because of my drug use, does this mean abstaining from drugs will ensure my recovery? I honestly feel like there is no possible way this life will ever belong to me again, regardless of the forums where people have said they've recovered. Please let me know what I'm dealing with here, thanks so much!