I Need Some Help

Hi,
I am an 18 year old male and I have suffering with anxiety related problems for about a month now. It started off as the usual with constantly being afraid of everything (death in particular), chest pains(which was the start to all this that was really a chest cold), and feeling very uneasy all the time that something serious and terrible could happen. I have only ever had 2 anxiety attacks (the second the night right after the night of the first one.) I didn't go to the ER during any of those attacks since I knew I wasn't having a heart attack and I had gone to the doctor the day after the first attack and nothing could be found wrong with me. That night I had a second even stronger panic attack and decided I had to go back to the doctor the next day because it was just getting to be ridiculous. I saw a different doctor this time and that's when he diagnosed a possible anxiety problem that was the cause of all this. He issued a chest x-ray, EKG, and blood work to be done just in case there may something else. (All the results then came back normal and completely fine.) He said anxiety can cause a lot of these things and I will admit I had been very stressed over the two months before then. (I guess I hadn't realized what could eventually happen because of it.) I do admit I have been under a lot of stress, especially through last October and November. (dealing with college apps, SAT's, my graduation project, and problems with getting my now previous job to cooperate with me. Not to mentions school tests, grades, and homework since I'm trying for the best possible Senior year as far as grades go.)(I am also not usually not stressed very often either.) But anyways, during the two weeks after my doctors visits and three days of missed school, I started to feel much better and I was learning to relax more. My chest pains for the most part subsided and I felt very good. I always had this very very small uneasiness feeling but it kept getting better day after day and I though I was finally getting over all this ****.

When the week of Christmas began I started to have problems again. I was getting the chest pain and uneasiness feeling back along with fear that something could seriously be wrong with me. (no anxiety attacks though) Christmas eve while I was laying in bed I had a terrible shaking fit that lasted about a half hour. It was almost to the point of exhaustion. During Christmas day I felt very uneasy the whole day and I was also suffering from a lot of fatigue since I had only gotten 3 hours of sleep the night before due to the shaking fit. I had taken a nap in the afternoon Christmas day and it seemed to help a lot. That night I had also had a terrible sneezing fit which I get sometimes (more rarely during the winter months but does happen once or twice) due to my allergies. During the entire day Friday and Saturday my entire face hurt terribly along with my head. It has gotten better since then but now it feels like my forehead is going to explode and I feel pressure in the top of my head along with some very dull pains down the sides of my face. My nose isn't very stuffed up now but it was. Could this possibly be a sinus infection and I should see a doctor about it? (my anxiety with this is almost driving me crazy too, it is causing me to fear a doctor visit this since somewhere subconsciously I feel its something else more serious but consciously I know I'm fine.) My forehead also feels very warm from time to time but not always. When I wake up I feel fine. It seems throughout the day the pressure in my head gets worse and it feels even worse while I'm typing this up looking at a computer screen. So to relieve my anxiety with this, could this be a sinus infection of some kind? I have had sinus infections before but I have never felt anything like this.

I also have one more problem that I really do not understand at all. Just this week, maybe last Sunday too I'm not totally sure, I started having random pains all around the left side of my chest. (I think I have had 2 in the right side though.) They would come and go at random times and would last maybe 20 or 30 minutes. Other times they could just be a dull pain in one particular area lasting maybe an hour or two. These REALLY leave me with a very uneasy feeling that I think is provoking more stress and causing even more chest pain and overall uneasiness. (And probably more head pain.) Along with these pains I have also been feeling a lot of fatigue all week long. That may be due to my trouble sleeping at night which is also another problem I am having. Sometimes I find myself not falling asleep until 3, 4 or even 5 in the morning and sleeping until noon the next day. This isn't what I experienced when all this anxiety stuff began.

So does anyone have any thoughts or ideas that could help me out? I really hate this uneasy feeling and it makes me feel like my heart could stop or something any minute and that I am going to pass out or something. (Stupid I know but I guess this is anxiety and I hate that I cannot control this feeling.) I am almost to the point where I fear I have developed an anxiety disorder and that I am very scared of stressing my self doing anything physical for fear of something bad happening to me. I want to get up and do something but I can't.

Please help me!
Thanks a bunch!
-Alex

[thepilot]

What up Alex! Yeah dude I'm kind of going through the same thing right now except instead of that sinus pain you're having I have ulcer pains. I feel a sharp piercing sensation right below my heart near my mid-rib cage and it feels like i'm about to have a heart attack too. I get the tingles all over my body, including near my neck like if I do pass out I feel as if I will be paralyzed or if I'm going to have a mini-stroke or something. It's a pretty scary feeling though. As far as the whole palpitations go, I think those will go away when you learn how to control the breathing part by taking 5-10 seconds (which is what my doctor tells me to do). I'm 22 and It's been almost a month since my first anxiety attack when it felt like I hyperventilated and the whole right side of my body became numb and doctors gave me drowsy/anti-depressant pills.  I haven't taken any of them yet because I know that I can beat this anxiety w/ out pills.  I believe it's just going to take time.  Other than that lately I've been trying to exercise so my body can be conditionally healthy and I made an appointment w/ a psychiatrist to guide me through what's going on w/ me.  We all hate the feeling but someone else said this to me in one of my discussion forums, "just know that you're not alone," which made me feel a little better.  The rest is all up to you if you're willing to deal w/ it and beat it. People keep telling me not to think too much (which is hard because I'm hella used to it) because the thoughts can really provoke your body to feel what you're thinking.  I've been trying to learn how to meditate, which I though I would never do in a billion years and also have been reading inspirational books too like Joel Osteen and watching funnyass dvd's to get my mind off of this **** and it sort of helps.  It's good to talk about our health sometimes but I noticed that thinking that it will get worse can actually make it worse.  My girlfriend almost wanted to break up with me because I'm stressing her out w/ my problems of anxiety and she possibly believes that I might pass it on to her, which is another type of stress for me plus school, etc. It's pretty tough to focus on many things now but I guess taking it easy one by one is my way to relax. So you're not alone buddy. Comment back if you have something else to say. Anxiety ***** but if we find techniques to beat it, it should go away. I guess we just gotta be confident.  Later Alex!

[MZ3Alex]

Hey man thanks for the reply! I definitely know what you mean about the thinking about it will only make it worse. To be honest it's hard not to though. I mean, my head goes so nuts sometimes thinking that there is something terribly, horrifyingly wrong with me that it becomes almost downright impossible to relax or try to think about something else. Then that's when i begin to feel the worst. And when I finally do get my mind off it, there is always this underlying fear that seems to stick with me that I can only think of as creating the uneasy feeling about whatever was hurting to begin with. (like my chest.) Even now, with it being later I feel for the most part really good. I still just have this uneasy feeling left in my head though about how I felt earlier in the day that I just can't get rid of and I know it's making my chest feel uneasy. (Like something could happen to me at any second despite there's no pain and the palpitations have stopped.) I know I'll go to bed with this feeling and wake up with it no longer there but then it'll come back throughout the day. I honestly used to hate mornings but now I'm beginning to like them. I like the first minute or two right after you wake up before your mind sets in on all your problems because it's when I feel the best. (That's also why I know all this is anxiety related.) But just out of curiosity, do you sometimes have the uneasy feeling throughout the evening and before you go to bed? Like something might happen to you while you are sleeping? I guess just a basic overall fear of going to sleep?

Also, I guess there is a good side to this. (I think...) Have you lost any weight with these anxiety problems? Last June I used to weigh 189 pounds. (I'm not fat though.) Over the summer I worked as a ride operator at a local theme part and come September I weighed 178 pounds. (Which can be explained why I lost the weight and this was before any anxiety problems.) This morning when I woke up I weighed 167 pounds. Since this anxiety started I have lost 11 pounds without trying. I know anxiety attacks have the same effects on your health as a small workout but I never knew it could do that much. Most of the beginning of the 11 pounds lost were during the week when I first started having the anxiety problems and I had those 2 attacks. I have lost a couple more pounds since then when all this started up again last week. I was just wondering if any of this has happened to you? I'm thinking of starting to work out as well to get myself more healthy and lose even more weight. Maybe that will help out my anxiety of there being something wrong with me. Just make myself feel more healthier.

I honestly just wish the anxiety would go away though. I have had enough of it and there are other things I need to do besides fighting this. Tomorrow I have a party at a buddy's house that I am looking froward to. Hopefully getting back in the flow of things and being around some friends will help out all this out. I find it pretty difficult to find things around the house to do to take my mind off things when I'm feeling bad. Everything I do just doesn't seem to help and my mind just continuously wonders back. I will hang in there though and get through this. I would like to go back to the doctor and get something to at least make me feel better since I have had it with this but I guess I'll just try and push through it like you are. It is truly a great feeling knowing I'm not alone but I cancels itself out knowing I have a problem which ***** big time.

Do you maybe have any more ideas or techniques I could use to fight this since you seem to know a decent deal more than i do? I would really appreciate it!

-Alex

[thepilot]

Yeah I understand you when you say how you like your days but sometime during the day it comes out of nowhere. I'm assuming that when that happens one tiny thought or maybe a subconscious thought we created triggers it in our brain then makes our body get nervous to the point we feel those things in our veins.  But that's only my assumption personally. It's like our minds focus on where we feel strained before where we didn't notice it.  Like before the first anxiety attack happened we probably typed and felt a little sore in our arms and back from the style of our posture and now that the anxiety is released it feels all of those types of that stress now. I'm not a psychologist but those are my thoughts.  But I guess its easier to say it that to explain how the feeling really is at the moment but all we could do is just to have some faith in feeling better than how we were before. I could hella relate when you wake up in the mornings now because I've never been so happy that I'm alive. For some reason I think I just became more nicer than I was before. I still have the physical feelings in my arm w/ the beats in my heart but every time it comes I prepare for it and start thinking of good things rather than worrying because when I used to worry, I would panic then my body would even react even more to the problem.  It's really tough-I sort of understand you.  I guess we're just suppose to accept our anxiety for what it is and deal with it to the point where it could possibly fadeaway. I'm not too sure if i mentioned this but I think putting a rubberband around one of your wrist my help because whenever you think of a crazy thought, you could tug on the rubberband and flick yourself w/ it (kind of like a discipline).  It sounds kinda funny but it can be another technique to get rid of your thoughts. I learned about it during my last couple weeks of finals-especially when I was studying.  My thoughts were pretty bad because it would distract studying but lately it calmed down. Try making an appointment with some sort of psychologist and see what they might have to offer-I did it and for some reason I'm sort of excited that I'm seeking for help. Actually I've been more happier lately that I'm acting upon my anxiety rather than letting it beat me.  So I hear you're going to social party? I went to a friend party recently and I actually had a good time.  Of course my anxiety randomly came when I was eating some food. When it came I took a step outside with a friend and said to myself "I'm going to be fine" while taking deep breaths to relax my heart's nervousness.  I felt good like 10 minutes later. I noticed too that I'd talk about it w/ some friends but I guess its not too good to get into it in a discussion too much because people will begin to pity you, which you shouldn't let happen.  I THINK or I mean I FEEL that if you say you have an illness to someone, they may feel sorry for you and then you'll be the dude w/ the problem then you'll have it in the back of your head saying that they know about you so now it'll be like they'll be more special, which is kind of spoiling yourself. That's only from my perspective but yeah you should go to that party-take deep breaths and chill.  Try that rubberband technique or see a psychiatrist.  I've been taking psychology classes in my school right now and I'm learning crazy yet cool things.  Next semester I'm taking more psychology classes and I'm hella interested to go to school so I could get MY MIND off of this stuff! I'm kind of glad it happened because before the incident I had a lot of stress in my mind and now I've been taking it a lot more easy. Aye bro keep in touch and let me know how your doing? We both could conquer this anxiety shiet!!!!!!!!As a matter of fact all who have anxiety-we could all do this!!!Later Alex-take it easy again bro. Don't force the anxiety, just calm it down. I know its hard-hay I feel almost the same feelings but I'm trying too. Actually I'm not trying, I'm doing something! Comment back if anything. Peace!

[thepilot]

Oh yeah I felt I was but then I started eating a little much more and I gained a few pounds because when I didn't eat, I noticed I was stress. So go eat some crackers or some snacks when you feel your anxiety is taking place. If you don't eat I believe your stomach growls and then you become a little grumpy. When you eat you gain some energy and sort of/just a tad bit feel a bit better. Try eating on a healthier diet not to lose weight or gain weight but a healthy diet as far as timed eating scheduled. Thats what happened when I learned i had an ulcer.  Okay mann Later!

[MZ3Alex]

Hey thanks for the rubber band suggestion. I am trying it now and it actually works pretty well. As for the party I had a great time. I had a little anxiety for around the first hour or so but then i started to feel really good afterwords. I liked being around my friends and it really comforted me despite I havent told any of them about my problems. For the last 2 hours or so during the party i actually felt amazing. I didnt have any chest pain or anything and I didn't feel uneasy at all. As soon as I got home though I started feeling the uneasiness again and started getting a little chest pain but I think I'm finally learning to control it. I don't feel nearly as bad as I did last night before I went to bed and the rubber band thing combined with the happy thoughts idea you suggested works very well. I thank you A LOT for those suggestions. While I know I'm not nearly cured yet it certinly helps. I didn't really feel any fatigue today either which is yet another good sign. As I am typing this now I feel really good too. As long as I can keep my mind from straying onto any stressful thoughts I think I will be able to fall asleep well tonight. I just gotta keep concentrating on the good thoughts. I really wish I could suggest something but I am just so new to all these feelings I don't have anything to say. I'm still trying to figure out whats a plus and whats a minus. I definitely say though social gatherings are a huge plus though. At least for me it is. Well keep me informed on your stats as well and if you have anything you want to ask me or if you need some help with anything let me know. Like you said we will get through this. It's just a matter of time and good thoughts! :) Okay well I need to go to bed so I gotta wrap this up now.

Best of luck,
Alex

[thepilot]

Damn its good to hear that everything is swell. Yeah the feeling is still around huh? Although the feeling can possibly be avoided right? It's pretty cool how mind over matter works sometimes or maybe most of the times. There's a whole lot of ways to get rid of pain that our body feels and in these recent years I've learned how to approach them. Pretty much I'm almost convinced that the anxiety in most people like us was originally in us long way before we even knew like probably when we were teenagers or even younger. It's just that during that moment it exploded (pretty much happened) the stress released it that way. It hella was an ugly, painful, scary feeling, and the fact that it DID happen, we now are aware of it. Now controlling it is the only way along w/ how much effort we're willing to put to it to not let it overcome us. Yeah dude I felt hella good around the people when I went that party I was telling you. Then you when you went home it kind of acted up huh? I guess because we were sort of alone and the moment of feeling good was earlier. I notice when you, or me, or anyone become alone we all tend to think a lot, which can be good sometimes depending on what it is that we think of. Me, I used to think of crazy negative thoughts, but I hate the idea of it and now I'm developing greater thoughts about how much fun the rest of my life is going to be. Yeah Positive thoughts plus positive energy can put away painful/physical feelings aside like knowing you're going to do hella good on your SAT's and that project you were working hard for. Even in that party you felt good like you said. If only everyday could be like that right? Now all I do is try to make everyday like that as much as possible. I do get tired and I still pain lingering around me but I'm at that point where I'm going to do something about it.  Personally I feel that the mind is powerful! Lets just say that someone near said they had a headache or someback pains and then an hour later you felt those pains. Those type of things could almost be true. As long as we put our mind into dedication to get rid of what he don't feel comfortable with it could work. Lately I've been doing that, hella exercising to condition my heartbeats, plus whole lot of positive thoughts. That rubberband idea is pretty cool huh? If you're interested in some other techniques that you're willing to put some sacrifce to comment me back. I'm interested in looking for help as well as helping other people out nowadays, which I never would used to do as much before. It's time for change buddy.  By the way thanks for the response.  It also makes me feel good that someone almost w/ the same problem is communicating with me. Like you said even typing this up makes you feel good. I feel that too! I'm not a big fan of pills so I said "forget it." I'm going to do the best that I can w/out relying on medication. Instead of medication I prefer meditation. Heh. Well keep in touch. Life is interesting and lets keep it interesting. Later

-thepilot

[MZ3Alex]

Hey I almost wish I never was aware of it to begin with. I'm not sure if I like being more aware of the anxiety or not. I like that I now know what it is but I don't like the feelings it's giving me. Especially during the little uneasy episodes and the dull annoyance of pain in my chest that makes it feel like I could have a heart attack at any time or one of my lungs is going to collapse or something. I notice when I take my mind off of that then the pain slowly goes away and I feel normal again. These things just come out of nowhere and it seems it still only happens at night. I really don't want to get any therapy for this or see a psychologist. I really think i can beat it by myself and through things that I do and just being around my friends. I am a senior in high school so I should really be living it up right now but I have missed so much of the Christmas season because of this anxiety garbage I really hate it. And to be honest my mind just keeps going back to that fact and for some reason it sparks more anxiety even now. Perhaps I'm finally on the verge of controlling my thoughts and ridding myself of this and by the sounds of things you are too. Which is really great news to hear. (I need to continue this message on a different computer so i'll post what I have now and continue in a couple minutes.)

[MZ3Alex]

(Sorry I just didn't feel like erasing everything and starting over.) But anyways, yes I agree the mind is powerful. If you tell yourself you have a problem, I think your mind kind'a makes it that way. If you tell yourself you don't, then you don't. But when a disorder becomes of a normal everyday sort of thing then it becomes very difficult to tell yourself you don't have a problem. It's almost like even as much as you think and verbally tell yourself there's nothing wrong, there's still this little subconscious thought left in there that knows you do. And that's almost like the disorder to begin with. I am going to start up some exercising and I have a friend who is kind enough to help me out with it. Hopefully that will bring up some good self-esteem and more positive thoughts. I fell a little worse than I did yesterday but I think that's cause I haven't gotten out of the house today. Tomorrow I go back to school so hopefully I will feel A LOT better. At least I hope. I am also very interested in those other techniques you mentioned. I am willing to do just about anything at this point to rid myself of this. Yes it is time for a change and we will make it happen. We just gotta concentrate and take it easy. I think another thing we need to do is when there is some little ache or pain anywhere in our body, we don't get so much anxiety over it. That is one of my main triggers. See it's been so long and so much has happened since all my anxiety started I can't remember what's normal anymore. I have always had some small pains in my chest sometimes that I usually just disregard as some kind of muscle pain since I don't really work out. (And it usually only happens after I have been laying on my side or sitting in a wrong position.) I would have never thought of worrying about it or going into a panic attack over it. But now every time I get a little pain I think it is the result of something terribly, terribly wrong. I just need to start convincing myself it's not. I have also noticed that over the past couple of days the dull pain in my chest is subsiding. I think it's due in part to my thoughts getting better. You really made an excellent point there about the thoughts. It's not only thinking positive but preventing yourself from worrying about everything that makes you feel better. It really only causes more pain by worrying. Just ignoring and continuing makes it go away. I also noticed I haven't really had any heart palpitations today either. I also don't want to start thinking about it either or I know I will start feeling some. But anyways, like before it really is good talking about this with someone and having them share their experiences back. I thank you very much for doing this. I'm going to wrap this up now but again, and questions or problems, please share them and I will try to help and I'm sure you'll do the same. :)
-Alex

[mel16747]

Omg same thing with me
tho i don't want to go to the doctors or anything
I just want it to go away like alone :S
What can I do to stop this without doctors ?

x

[thepilot]

Yup. The pain still exist in my chest as well and not only that but the tingles in my left arm like my veins are clogged and some lower back problems (I don't want to get into that). I've learned that the pain is real because in this type of anxiety, which is health anxiety, we feel the insides of our body. Its hella not a good feeling at all, I still hate that fact that it still lingers in several parts of my body but it's not as bad as it was before (I'm sure you could relate). I have an appointment w/ my psychiatrist today and hopefully that goes well. I'll let you know how that goes. So you're going to exercise-cool! I had a friend of mine drop by my place to shoot some hoops w/ me yesterday and that pretty much gave me a good cardio workout plus kept my mind busy. I felt the uneasy pain right before bed again (exactly like how you feel) but I just massaged my chest w/ my right hand and squeezed a stressball w/ my left (pretty funny huh? Oh and I flicked myself w/ the rubberband). The other techniques that I've learned how to use, which works during other times when you don't feel like thinking of a positive thought is sort of like mind therapy (Oh and if you don't want to see a psychiatrist or a therapist that's cool just make sure you do what you can to make yourself feel better-I'm seeing one because I feel it might help me out a bit more). As I was saying it gets pretty technical w/ these strategies and you have to put some visual into it. It may sound crazy but for some reason it worked for me a couple times. What you could do is when you're feeling the pain (where ever it is), you take that pain and visually throw it away (sounds weird huh?). For example, my pain is in my chest, I'll metaphorically take that chest pain by grabbing it w/ my hand-put it in a real or imaginary envelope and tear it up-and then the pain will go away. Or if that doesn't work, I'll grab my chest pain again by the hand-literally go to the bathroom to throw it in the toilet and then flush it down the drain to make me really believe the pain is gone! Another way is to grab the pain, like my left forearm for instance, crush the pain like its in my hand again into a clenched fist, and throw it to the sky and out into the universe because the universe is hella big. These make me feel better for some reason. It may not work for you or it'll probably work as long as you put your mind into it. Still you will expect pain, like me, I feel headaches and I assume my ear could be the problem to make my chest and arm feel uneasy but I just massage my pain, discipline myself by taking that rubberband around my wrist and flicking myself for every bad thought, and doing that mind therapy technique. I honestly hate this pain but personally I just feel that those are some ways that I can get rid of it in my head. I could pretty much relate when you say you feel the pain and once you feel it a pretty bad thought like something horrible is going to happen but thing is after that pain slowly fades away, you're still breathing because you still believe you're okay. That exact moment is a biitch right? I know but I guess all we could do is to find ways to beat it. Sometimes we even want to become investigators so we could even find the real physical problem that is really going on inside of us. For some reason I have been doing that and I really don't get myself anywhere but stress. I still do it but I take it easy on the thoughts. I'm hella glad you're keeping me updated w/ yourself as well. Makes me feel like I'm not alone in this anxiety world. Lets just find our shuttle to get back to our normal world. That's sounds a lot better huh? So yeah let me know how your first day of school from that winter break went. And to mel16747, read me and alex's comments in this forum if you want a glimpse at what where doing and give us some feedback if you think it'll make us progress or feel any better. For the meantime lets just keep these POSITIVE THOUGHTS permanent. Discuss these types of things w/ people like you guys is only making me feel more confident, mentally, and tad bit physically better (you know what I mean heh). Comment back if anything please?

-thepilot

[thepilot]

By the way what makes you feel better in life nowadays? Way before the anxiety attack occured what kept you occupied that you really loved doing? Any goals? Hobbies? Maybe if what discussed what we loved doing the most we'll fall back right into our normal state (just a thought). If you're down to discuss about this leave a comment. It's kind of like counseling but it might make us feel pretty good...? I'll be glad to talk about this if anything.

-thepilot

[mel16747]

okay I was totally random on here before
so I'll just tell u's how this all started ...

About the last week of school
I developed something to do with my sinuses and couldn't eat and had no appetite and just wasn't happy like I usually am . So doctor gave me a sinus spray thing and I read online heaps of people had it and yeah it passed sort of.

Then when I had my blood test taken out doctor said she'll call back even if it ain't dangerous (as they don't call back if it ain;'t but my mum knows her :P ..)
but she never did and that day I started worrying omg what if .. this.. what if that..
you know ... and ever since that day I was constantly thinking of dying and was sacred of it so much.. So now that I read what you guys wrote and some other sites i went on I realized it ain't only that but constantly thinking of \things and
I cannot sleep nor eat nor anything.

Even when going out shopping whatever
I'm just like this ever since that bloody throat thing happened which was bad as I am veryy sensitive to anything with my neck and throat.

Now I'm going to start yr 12 in 2 weeks (I'm only 17)
and think I won't be able to concentrate
I know this is like no point 'cos people shouldn't worry about things they cannot control and I just wanna be myself again ....

I think My mum has it too. I - kind - of told her what's bugging me ..
and she said it might be 'cos of our way of life at home ( Dad makes trouble)
but that was since ever... she said it might be affecting me now 'cos I'm older and yeah ...


anyways yeah I wish
I wish it can go away from me and anyone else
'cos this ***** **** bad.

x

[mel16747]

PS.
and also I have BAD headaches
and chest pains and Gosh what not...

x

[MZ3Alex]

Hey man! I'm sorry your still having those pains dude. I wish I could tell you something to help them go away but I don't really know what to say. Hopefully the psychologist can help you out. :) I am very interested to learn how that went today so please be sure to tell me about it. Your idea of visually throwing away the pain or ripping it up is far from silly or weird. It actually works amazing! Anywhere I got a little bit of pain in my chrst tonight, I just used that technique and it worked like a charm. Thank you a TON for that idea. My first day back after break was actually pretty decent. It wasn't amazing and I did have some dull all around chest pain from time to time but I felt pretty good and it was nice to be back. Even when I got home I felt pretty good. I decided to go out and work on my car when I got home since my garage was actually somewhat warm for some reason and that really took my mind off things. Aftet I had dinner I went and chilled at my buddy's house for awhile whicb was even better. I always seem to get the uneasiness again though before I go to sleep. Tonight is not quite as bad as other nights though so I think may finally starting to fade. (yay!)

For your other questions there I can't really say there is anything that I enjoied doing before the whole anxiety issues that I either wouldn't or would enjoy doing now. The only thing I have really started to get into the past couple of weeks is photography. But even that has been more of a hobby of mine for a few years now. One thing I really usee toi be able to do before all this anxiety started was take naps a lot. Now I almost fear it. I think thats just more of a trust issue with myself that I need to get over though. Learning to trust your body again or so they say. But anyways yeah, I cant really comment too much on that. Okay well I need yo go now. Please let me know how the psychologise appt. went and remember to use all your awesome techniques as they really do work!

Think positive,
Alex

[thepilot]

What up! It's good to hear the your first day back in school went all right. It could've worst but your mind told you that everything is going to be okay. Yeah so i went to that meeting w/ my psychiatrist and he told me I definitely have anxiety-not anxiety disorder. The room was definitely nice. There was a couch (kind of cliche). Then we discussed pretty much my experience and what I have been doing about it. I even mentioned him about the thought stopping techniques that I have used and he was pretty surprised that I have knowledge of them (Whoa he just gave me a call a few seconds ago). Other than that its pretty much about getting rid of the thoughts that come in out of nowhere plus some meditation techniques which I'm not to familiar w/ yet but when I have the power to use them I should be able inform you a few. I had some lower abdomen pain today (hopefully not my ulcer) but I'm trying to not focus on it which is pretty hard. And later on tonight I'm about to go to the gym w/ my dad and do some cardio exercises like treadmill jogging, etc. (all the good stuff). I like the passion that you have for the fact that you're going to do something about your anxiety too. It's like we're on the same page. To mel I think overall the main goal is to get your mind off of the negative thoughts and keep your mind occupied on things that'll make you feel good. Alex is working on his car, exercising, and I'm doing some counseling plus exercising and reading some inspirational books. I believe its the best thing to do! Well I'm glad that we call all discuss about something very similar and lets keep ourselves positively FOCUSED and work our way back to the top again. Everyday is a good day and let's keep it that regardless of what type of symptoms we have. Keep in touch-I'll post something down tomorrow if anything.

-thepilot

[RichReligion]

The afraid thing has to be delt with.Their is something that is sticking around you for some odd reason...You have unresolved issue..that could be birthed for guilt. You are afraid because you are voulnerable and weak. YOu need to get you mojo back..Keep your head up and think, fearlessly. You need security, control, and assurance. Get out and do somethings for yourself..Reward your self...people may treat you like you're not so value, or you may not feel like you are where you need to be in life; However, you need to make you feel good.

[mel16747]

I think I will go doctors
cos It's very ******* annoying
and Im SO sad an pissed
an ma I cnt swallow atm an its scary very scary
if at lest it was what I sayd in ma comment be4 I can whatever ... kinda handle it
but swallowing is bad for me wayy.

:(;(

[MZ3Alex]

ThePilot,

I glad to hear that you do not have a disorder. I would only think that er are so close on the same page that I do not have one either. That really makes me feel better too! I would hope you could share some of the infi your psychologist tells you because I think it could really help some people even more and add this huge thread of information. As for me I continue to feel a little better and better each passing day. I still do get chest pain sometimes and uneasiness sometimes still does exist. Today was a really good day because I almost feel like I got a glimpse of my normal self back. I don't know why or from where but for about a few minutes today I really felt increadible. If I didn't know any better it was how I used to feel before all this. The main problems that still exist over all this are the phobias that were developed becase of the anxiety. I really need to get over them and get back to my life. Today I also came to a realization. While I was sitting in a chair watching TV I started to feel really bad out of nowhere. I got the uneasiness and dull chest pain pretty much out of nowhere. But something else happened too, I got this really sinking feeling inside as well that made my come to more of a realization of what was going on. I realized my anxiety had no orgin and there was absolutely nothing that should be causing it. I sort'a told myself the whole thing was stupid and I had had enough of it. After that I repositioned myself and sat more straight up and it was like all my pain went away. I believe more of this now has to do with realization. If you just realize how dumb everything is that you are experiencing you seem to loose that afarid mindset. Now granted I'm not back to normal just nor do I believe I will be tomarrow or the day after; the damage has already been done and it's now the process of recovering from it. Untill all those little phobias are gone and I have nothing to worry about anymore then I'll be fully recovered. Taking your mind and focusing it on something else really ia the key. You must make yourself forget how you felt before because it was only your mind making you feel that way. Whenever I do something that really takes my mind off my anxiety related thoughts, I really do feel great. Then when you get dobe with whatever it was you were doing, you feel normal, but then that little remider of how you felt before and what kind of situation you were in just comes back and ruibs the moment. That kind of thing is what needs to be worked on. But anyways, I need to stop with thisd because it is getting too long. I wish you the best of luck as always and I hope your psychologist sessions continue to go well. I will anways continue posting here and following up to make sure your doing alright. :)

Mel,
I'm not sure what to tell you but to really get into a comfortable position and read through this thread. I hope your doctor can help you out with the problems you have been having. Just remember it's going to be okay and to think positive. I'm not sure what your difficulty swallowing issue could be about. I have never heard of a problem like that as being a side effect of anxiety. I have personally never experienced anything like that myself except when I have been sick with strep or something. I wish you the best of luck as well! :)

RichReligion,
You make some exellent points there that i do agree with. I do have an unresolved issue and thats called a college acceptance letter. I can't really do much about that though as I'll have to wait for spring. I know I'll get into college it's just my fear of not getting into one that is always bugging me. It's only been in the recent few days I have come to realize how stupid that fear is and its that realization that is helping me. Trust me, I am trying to reward myself, and I am getting srtonger by the day. It's just amazing how much anxiety knocks someone out. And you can bet I'll be rewarding myself in the next few days to try and get rid of this once and for all. It's just about doing what makes you happy and creates positive thoughts.

Alright well I'm going to bed now. If you can believe it I typed all this up on an iphone. My thumbs are really hurting and my right arm is asleep. Lol. But anyways best wishes to everyone.

-Alex

[mel16747]

Thank you
I'm seeing my doctor On Saturday hopes all goes well.

:)
x

[MZ3Alex]

Mel?

How did your doctors appointment go? It hopefully went well right?

ThePilot,

How are things going with you? You havent posted back in awhile. How is the therapy going?

-Alex

[mel16747]

ThePilot -Alex

Hey
Well the doctor checked my heart beat, breathing and blood pressure and stomach
and she said everything was alright. 100% healthy. I wrote down all the symptoms I had and told her I might have magnesium deficiency which can cause ALL the symptoms of anxiety I have a whole page written down ... and I have to have another special blood test but in a month due to having one few weeks ago. That's a really long time .

I wish it is a magnesium deficiency because that is easily fixed and I won't have anxiety. But I'm hoping .... even though it may not be. I was just so over it as soon as I got out to the bus stop I broke down luckily my friend was there was support. :)

Also my doctor said to go out with friends and stay out of the house as much as possible and to get a job and try not to think about the unhealthy thins surrounding me.

Otherwise I still have headaches and I'm not sleeping but find myself a bit happier these days and seeming like my old self at times so that's one good thing I guess.

Anyway I'll have to wait 4 more weeks like this hoping they will pass and I'll get the results I want.

Did you guys have yourselves tested for this ? (Magnesium deficiency ... )

Hope all is good. Keep writing makes me feel better :)

xoxo
Melly <3

[MZ3Alex]

Sorry Mel I forgot to get back on here. =P Being with your friends really does help, it takes your mind off of you and focuses it on other people and other things. Then you forget you have any problems and all you anxiety goes away. Then you feel great, but the second you remember how you feel it unfortunately all comes back. At least that is how it is for me. =( I am glad to hear though that you doctors appointment went well. I hope those blood tests come back well too! I personally have had a blood test done but I don't know the extent of what was tested.

As for me though, I'm not sure where I am at with this. Some nights I feel great while others I feel like a heart attack at any second. Anxiety is tough. I do need to admit though that I am slowly feeling better and better each day. The anxiety keeps lessening and lessening but I would still like to schedule a follow-up appointment at the doctors sometime to make sure everything is still alright. I try to keep myself doing positive things but I am so anxious to get back to my normal self I sometimes do or watch negative things just to see the effect on me. Sometimes it just happens around me and there is nothing I can do about it. (Like the news etc....) Other times I'll watch a movie that has death in it and sometimes I'll almost feel like I'll die as well. I know it's stupid and I keep trying to tell myself that but it just sometimes doesn't fix the psychology. I know this really all doesn't sound good but trust me, it's better than it really is. =) As for any chest pain it, it seems to come and go. When it comes I feel uneasy and terrible, and when it goes I feel better. I'm not sure if I want medication or not. I know I would like to see a doctor again for a follow-up but it seems there are some pretty adverse side-effects to the medication here that I'm not so sure I want to deal with. Tonight was the first night in about 4 days I really haven't felt so good. My chest has felt uneasy the whole night and I have had some minor on and off shaking. I'm not sure if it's cause I'm cold since it's ridiculously cold here in Pennsylvania, or not. I just get that feeling back that something could happen any minute when I know it won't; when I know there is absolutely nothing wrong with me but I just can't force my mind to comprehend it. I almost wonder sometimes, if I could make myself forget about all these anxiety problems, would I feel fine? Or would the feelings still be there? What if I could just tell myself none of this ever happened? Oh I wish. But anyways, it's good to hear you are doing well, I am still slowly creeping along though, but in a good direction. =)

Well now that I have sounded weird enough and strayed far from my normal personality and how I usually am I'm going to skedaddle now. =P

Take care,
Alex

P.S. ThePilot, I really wish you would post back and let us know how you are doing.

[mel16747]

lol that's okay =)
Yeah exacty like the last few days I've been great hanged out with a friend and had sleepovers and as soon as

my friend left I fell back to thinking about this again which sucked 'cos I was happy and yeah ...

Yeah 3 weeks till my blood test. I hate waiting =P lol.Also i went to the doctors again just to get my moles

checked (I was anxious I had skin cancer ..) but luckily I am 100% cancer free but my doctor will keep an eye

out about it though, which is good. OMG I do exactly what you do and I thought I was the only one ... like me

aswell I would watch the news or even a tv show or a cartoon {lol} and someone may mention dying or getting sick and I start thinking Oh My God what if this happens to me ... yeah same everytime I try and reassure myself that I am fine and everything is okay I might feel a second of happiness but it's like every time I try tothink happy I just can't ... it's like it ain't allowing me .. don't know does that make sense =S
is it cold there ?
It's summer here in Australia very hot lol
I feel like that too, sometimes even I say you can't help what happens as my friend said to me ages ago "You

may go on the train home tommorow and it may crash and you might die, you just can't help it" I know that and I know I shoud't worry but like you said our minds just can't take it that way ...
I wish too but wishes hardly come true ay

By the way did this just happen to you out of nowehere or it is tied to anything else ?
I'm kind of stressing about grade 12 cos I start school in a week I hope I am able to do my study and things ..

Hope you well
xo
Melly <3

[MZ3Alex]

From one high school senior to another your going to love senior year. I know I do. I mean, your a senior now, underclassmen now respect you and you can boss them around and whatnot. Haha! Not that I do that cause I dont but it's still awesome being a senior. I'm sure you'll do fine. =D Anyways, to answer your question, this stuff did really catch me off guard. I was very stressed out with collehe apps and SATs but I never expected it could amount to this. My best advice to you, is if you plan on going to college, get everything in by October or November at latest. Don't let anything build up on you. I did and trust me I regret it but then again I never knew this would happen because of it. So basically, just get on top of things asap. It really helps. Trust me.

But as for the other things you mentioned, my stressors arn't necessarly built on getting in a train or a car accident, but more on physical problems with myself. For instance, I dont stress riding in a car or going to school, but more rather a slight feeling of chest pain or tiredness in my chest is a stressor that sets off my anxiety. I really don't like it at all, and the tests I have had done don't show anything wrong with me, but yet, for some reason getting my mind to believe that is very difficult. I always have thos constant feeling of doom when I am eiher alone or watching TV. My mind just slowly strays to the subject that I have some terrible heart condition or lung disease thats causing all my uneasiness and pains when in reality it's just the pure power of raw anxiety that's causing my problems to begin with. It's the thought I have a problem that's causing my problems. Honestly I haven't been feeling very good the last two days and at this point some kind of medication doesn't seem so bad. I'll hopefully get into the doctors on Monday and see if there is anything I can do. I have had it with this **** and I want it to go away.

So yeah, you can pretty much see the point I am at with this. Really gettin sick of it. But as always best of luck to you though!

-Alex

[MZ3Alex]

Hey I just realized I made a mistake with the months for the college apps up there. LOL I forgot you were in a different hemisphere. I guess it would be March or April in your case providing how you do things over there. In the US our college apps are supposed to be in no later than 3 months after school starts if not sooner. (Which for me it starts the very beginning of September but others late August.)

LOL Sorry I forgot about that for some reason. Gah! This anxiety is getting to me! =P

-Alex

[mel16747]

Yeah lol I hope.
lol bossy who me as if hehe jkz :P I can be though lols.Yeah here we do a big test and then they count that

with our school performance and only when we get our score back we can see what uni (commege) to go too

beacuse if you're score is low then there stuff you have to do to improve it,  I ain't that sure of it all yet lols.:P
Yeah who could've guessed
lol mine started by eating pizza as weird as it sounds that night I started having swallowing problems and few

weeks later started getting anxiety or whatever the hell this is I am just to tired of it. I haven't slept properly

in  months, am not my self , been very edgy towards my mum expecially I feel bad 'cos she's blaming her

self ...

Yeah well I was thinking about what you said and yeah I am okay going out and buses and that like whatever ..

:S
the only thing is now I am starting to do what you mentioned you do being scared of getting ill and something

bad happening too. The main thing is that and dying lol
that's weird :( I just don't wanan think about it ...
yeah minds are very tricky ay
.. lol a problem causing problems I get you lol this anxiety is just so complictaed wish someone could just

make a magic pill that makes it go away for ever ay ..
yeah same here and today I was not that good at all ... hopefully be better I'm going to be with a friend over the next

few days and then school in a week.

same here this is the worst thing that't ever happen to me ..
haha that's okay I ain't even that clued in how we do it here yet :P

Yeah I got 3 weeks left till that "blood test" that may change my life if its positive (I wish) or not ..hello anxiety for the rest of my life (hopefully not)

anywyas take care
wb soonish.
xo Melly <3

[MZ3Alex]

Hey Mel!

I think what you really need to do is treat yourself somehow. Do something really fun or buy yourself something really exciting that you can think about to take your mind off your thoughts. That's what I have been doing. Well, at least planning on what to do. I do have a question for you though, what is it you are stressing over? Is it going back to school or something else? I have come to figure out the only way to alleviate your symptoms of anxiety is by making whatever is stressing you not stress you anymore. Whether it's completing a task or studying or whatever, you need to finish it. Today was a very exciting day for me. I finally got an acceptance letter into the college I really wanted to get into. I am so happy right now and I feel like all my stress is gone! That was my main stressor too. And now that I can finally forget about it I feel so good! There is still just one thing that is really bothering me though. My mom tried to call to get me into a doctors appt. today and instead the doctor just sent in a prescription for some antibiotics without even seeing me in the office! =O He said that he thinks my chest pain is really pain in my chest muscles because of something I am doing. I am not really sure what but right now I don't have any chest pain or uneasy feelings and I think it's because I don't have anything to worry about anymore. I mean, there still is like this little uneasy feeling I have but I think it'll subside in the next few days with my main stressor finally gone. It almost makes me regret worrying in the first place. It's hard to imagine how far I have come in the past couple months and honestly do not dare to look back on them. I don't want to because I don't want to be reminded. And don't worry, your not dying. Neither am I. Think about it, what could be hurting you body? Are you sick? Are you in serious pain somewhere? Do you have an irregular heartbeat? Do you feel a sense of tingling all over your body? Well, if you answered no to those then your not dying. I mean, think about how stupid that sounds to say that. If you went to the doctor and everything check OK then there's nothing wrong with you. The doctor would know and be alarmed if there was. I'm sure your blood test will be fine too. Please, for the love of all that's great, don't stress yourself over that. Please please please don't. It'll only make your anxiety worse. There's nothing in a blood test that can't be cured. (Well, maybe there are, but do you really think you have something incurable? Come on'. =P) You'll be fine. Okay?

Alright well good luck and just think about what I said. =D
-Alex

[mel16747]

Hey before I reply your comment
everything just became worse after my first ever car accident last night now I feel even more bludhy fuking scared this happened at a really bad f***** time ay.

Even when I do things though I end up thinking about it ( at times at times not)
I dunno why I'm stressing I guess the only thing I stressing about is me or someone close to me having something happened to them ... and dying .... and it's really time I had enough !! I dn't know how though that's the thing =;(
I was stressed about schOOl last yr an shiet but that was nothing that was "normal" whatever normal is anymore :S this just came out of the blue and I dunno is it anxiety or the vitamin deficiency that mimics anxiety and other shiet that why the I wish days would go fast till ma blood test (17 and counting ...)
I also think I am stressed 'cos my parents fight all the time but they always have how come it didn't bug me then ... and I dunno ....I'm happy for you it's sorta unbelievable you've over come it. How many months did you have it for ? I'm not sick ... or serious pains but I do get chest pains and headaches an random pains on me :S
and I can HEAR my heart beat ..  wtf :S sorry about my swearing I'm just fed up an a bit stressed over what happened last night well not a bit a lot buh yeh ...what if I answered yes to those q's ? lol
Yeah lol .. I know there's nothing wrong it's -just- possible anxiety (err I feel sik just saying well typing that lols ..) Yeah I'm not worried about the blood test I am just hoping it is the vitamin thing cos if it ain't then itS this :@ Okay I'll try but first i want the blood test over then I can see what's up or not ...

Thanks :)
Melly *

[mel16747]

Omg any1 gon coment bak loL
Loner much :L joax :P