I'm Afraid of the Anxiety Meds. Please Help!

[bellawillow59]

My very first panic attack ten years ago was because of a severe allergic reaction to an antibiotic that contained sulfa.  My panic disorder and PTSD are a result of an abusive marriage and a crazy husband who was putting drugs in my food.  I was able to leave him, start my life over, had cognitive behavioral therapy, and have had minimal panic attacks over the past six years.  This past year the panic attacks have started up and are far worse than they have ever been.  My doctor said that the cognitive behavioral techniques that worked before are not working anymore and that I need to go on medication.  He understands how hard meds are for me to take as I am allergic to so many things.  He prescribed a 5 mg dose of Celexa/Citalopram for me to take once a day until I become comfortable with it and then we will got to 10 mg and see how that works.  I can't do it.  I had to take Lorazepam a few times when I have a panic attack and .25 mg is way too strong for me.  My body is so sensitive to meds.  

I need help.  What can I expect from taking this Celexa on a regular basis?  I broke the 10 mg pill into a fourth and took about 2.5 mg of it and it made me tingly all over, made me nausous, tired, and I had diaherra.  After about four hours, I started to relax a little bit.  I'm afraid to take it again, and I'm afraid to take the 5 mg.

Should I stick with the Celexa or is there a more mild medication out there?  What is the medication going to make me feel like when I take it on a regular basis?  I know that a lot of people take meds for their anxiety, and I know that I need to do this, but my anxiety and my fear of medication is not allowing me to get this stuff into me.

Please......any suggestions would help me.  Thank you so very much.

Pegi

[compnet]

You're looking for something mild...
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Anxiety/Anxiety--Depression--Panic----Magnesium/show/1313099

[GettingOlder]

Perhaps discussing this on a regular basis with a therapist will help you to calm down enough that you won't need the meds? Best wishes!

[RubyWitch]

I can certainly understand your fear of medications given your history. I disagree with your doctor telling you that the CBT will no longer work for you. Well, let me amend that. Maybe, just maybe, the CBT has done all it can for you. But there are other forms of therapy out there and I think your doctor is being a bit hasty in stating that you "need" to go on medication before exploring all your options. And that includes herbal/natural remedies.

When and if the time comes that you decide to try a medication, I would strongly urge you to consult with a PMM. (Psychiatric Medication Manager) They can be found in most psychiatric clinics and they deal only with your medications, you do not see them for therapy.

Most PCPs do not understand psychiatric disorders very well and they sure as hell do not understand the meds we use. Witness how many people on this forum are messed up thanks to their GPs.

You asked some questions about how you would feel on certain medications. There is no way any of us can answer that question. We all react differently to meds and with your sensitivity, that possibly complicates or compounds YOUR reaction. None of us really know how a med is going to affect us which is why we say it is a real "trial and error" process.

I would suggest you speak with a PMM, who can refer you to a good therapist and the three of you would work as a team to get your anxiety/panic under control.

I wish you the best.
Peace
Greenlydia  

[MMahon]

I had experiences with some medications where starting on the 'usual dose' had me reacting really badly.  But then stopping and then restarting on much smaller dose and increasing slowly allowed me to fully benefit from the medication and allow it to build more slowly in my system.   So there is nothing wrong with you breaking up the pills and going at a slower pace.
Ask your doctor, I don't see any reason why he wouldn't ok this.  
A lot of people have the 'reverse placebo' effect with medication.  They get so worked up and anxious over taking a medication and anticipating side effects that even taking a sugar pill causes severe side effects.  
Try not to overanalyze the situation.  The medication is meant to help you and expect that it will.  There is nothing to fear.  Yes sometimes there are side effects but they go away or another medication may not have them.  It's not a good reason to give up.  Keep in mind that your 'fear of medication' is quite likely a symptom of anxiety so don't let it's symptoms prevent you from getting relief from them.   You are not alone in this feeling...it's quite common with anxiety sufferers.  You will get better and medication will help.  There's many of us here who can attest to that.  Take care.