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I've been diagnosed with agoraphobia and I have a few questions on it.

I've been diagnosed with agoraphobia and I have a few questions on it.

Hi I'm Jo, I'm sixteen years old and as I've said previously, I've been diagnosed with agoraphobia.  Most of the symptoms match up and I've had two times in my life where I haven't left the house for around two years.  The thing that bothers me is that agoraphobia is a fear of going outside, getting out of the safety zone, etc.  But when I was in the house, I felt that I just couldn't leave, I don't remember feeling "fear" or thinking anything along the lines of that.  I get panic attacks a lot even now, but it's just anxiousness, I can't seem to see it as fear...

Even I find it a bit odd, but I just can't help but feel that way...  So I was wondering if there were anyone else that feels the same as me?  Do you feel uncomfortable, inept and anxious over social situations, etc. but not fear?

...Argh...  I'm a wee-bit confused...  I have long and short term memory loss (reason unknown right now) so I don't know if I've ever been scared before, am I overestimating it as a word too much?  Is it possible for me to have a fear without realising it?  I know anxiousness is linked to fear, but...  When I have panic attacks, they are for no reason most of the time.  But with a phobia, it does have reasons...  

Do you think I'm obsessing over this too much?  I haven't got a clue what to think, I have no memories to know if something started the phobia or not.  I find it a bit hard to believe that I was scared of something and didn't realise it...  *Sighs.*  I'm rambling on here...

Ummm...  Yeah...  I'm gonna post this now 'cause I'm already starting to think about not doing it...  
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Agoraphobia can be VERY debilitating as you know.  But, in my opinion, you do not necessarily have to feel panic to suffer from it.  Your feelings of ineptness, anxiousness are all fears resulting in your staying the house.  Anxiety can take many different forms and you can definitely be afraid of something without realizing it; in my experience that is one of the reasons why it can be so frustrating.

Have you seen a therapist about this at all?  For me, that is the number one way in confronting this and really learning about it.  Please keep us posted!
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Avatar_f_tn
Thanks for your reply, I feel a bit better after reading your post.  As for a therapist, no I haven't, as you can imagine; the only reason I'm diagnosed as such is because my absence from school was noticed.  But as soon as I was put back into the education system, via a Learning Center, I heard nothing else from them.

I only just started thinking about going to the doctors recently because I'm having panic attacks more frequently.  I'll try to keep updated when I finally manage to get an appointment.  Thanks for your time.
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Yes, I have a touch of agoraphobia myself.  Just like you, I do not "fear" going outside, I do not "fear" something will happen...I just get anxious about it and it is a very very uncomfortable feeling.  I know that I push through it on a daily basis and I get out of the house because I do not want to become paralyzed by this feeling.  

You definitely need to get into therapy.  It isn't fair that you have to live your life being a prisoner in your home. You need to try to become more proactive in your recovery.  Is there anyone that you can go out with that makes you feel less anxious?  Is it with everyone or when you are by yourself?  These are questions you need answered and you need to develop a plan of action.  A therapist is the first place to start.  Start TODAY with the phone call...I AM ROOTING FOR YOU!
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