You shouldn't take valerian with benzos, it acts on the same receptors. There are other herbs that can help, and if you go off the benzos you can use all kinds of natural relaxants. A naturopath or herbalist can help you there. But the doctor you're seeing, if you're describing this correctly, is one you should drop. Xanax is just as "addictive" as klonopin, in fact more so. Klonopin usually dosed daily, though, as it's longer acting but doesn't come on as quickly, and not 2mg at bedtime but .5 or 1mg twice a day to keep it in your system. Xanax, being quicker acting, can be taken as needed more effectively, but that's only if it works for you. Drugs don't work the same for everyone, and it appears the klonopin worked better for you than the Xanax. Xanax made me more phobic, not less. That's how drugs are, they're very different depending on the individual taking them.
Try Valerian to sleep, it's pretty good a natural herb.
if you ask for regular xanax you can break them into pieces, you can't with the extended release. any of the benzodiazepins are addictive, xanax just works faster but for a shorter period of time after taking it. the effects wear off quicker than klonopin i do believe. if your doctor won't give you regular xanax then ask him for a lower dose of the xr, and ask how many a day you can have. i take xanax but not every day so my risk for dependency is lower. if you can get by with a lower dose at least most of the time you'll be better off when it comes to dependency. if you've been taking them everyday you can't just quit taking them because you could have seizures or something else bad happen. ....as for a natural remedy, go to puritan.com, your local health store or where ever you buy health supplements and, i've read (i think in prevention mag), that sage leaf extract capsules can help with anxiety but make sure you ask your doctor before you buy them! also prayer and quiet time or listening to music or reading helps me sometimes.
Coming off of benzos can be really tricky sometimes; especially if you have been on them for awhile. The only way to do it, is with the consultation of your prescribing doctor in my experience. As long as he/she is knowledgeable, which most are, they should be your trusted agent as you wean yourself off ot them. My mantra has always been the 'slower the better.'
I really don't know the best way to do it, but have you expressed your concerns with your doc? Also, be careful with 'natural' rememedies. They can interact dangerously with other meds you are on and sometimes can be much more trouble than they are worth in my opinion...keep us posted!