My Girlfriend and Anxiety.

[carpenter117]

My girlfriend suffers from non-specific anxiety attacks. This has been troubling her for the duration of our relationship. From what i can gather she has symptoms in common with panic disorder, i.e headache, heart palpatations and trouble breathing. Despite my constant badgering she refuses to go and see her local doctor (her mother is one of those goddamn homeopaths, so therefore conventional medicine is the worst thing in the world to that family).

It seems that the cycle will never break and although she doesn't see it, it puts a tremendous strain on me. Whenever an attack occurs i generally try to do what i can but i'm no medical expert so have nothing to offer her that can genuinely help.

I would be eternally grateful if someone could give me some advice on either how to coax her into seeking help or the best ways to deal with the problem myself to improve her quality of life,

[Paxiled]

A doctor won't help her; they know nothing about mental problems.  A psychologist might.  A naturopath might, too.  A good homeopath might.  Is she taking any natural remedies?  Medication isn't the first step here, it just helps with symptoms but doesn't cure anything.  Don't knock homeopathy if you've never tried it, or natural remedies if you've never tried them, and don't praise medication if you've never suffered that.  But therapy is important.  Medication can always be used if nothing else works.  

[dsdr]

My wife is being treated for anxiety.  She has a daily medicine she takes and one she used to take when she had a anxiety attack.  The second she hasn't used for 1.5 years :-)

I love my wife but she was a bit of a mess when I met her.  She was on the meds and they worked for the most part but she still suffered from panic attacks when I met her.  What worked for her was having me over her when she was going into a panic attack (she didn't have a choice..lol).  As she is going into it I'd tell her to breath in or out and make sure she does take a breath.  In my wife's case, she would hold her breath and put herself deeper into it...kind of a downward spiral.  Breathing takes the hyperventilation out of the equation but for me took a lot of patience...a few months.  I kept on reminding her to breath in or breath out and would literally hover above her has she laid on the bed/floor wherever.  I kept in simple I'd say breath in or breath out...and flick her nose if she didn't or something else to get her attention.  I tried to keep her focused on me and to listen to my voice as the anxiety always wanted to pull her in.  I was business-like and used a basic monotone as you can only show her how but not tell her to do it.  She eventually realized that she could breath in & out on her own and was able to kick out of the panic attacks before they got bad in our case.  

This is not a cure...but reduced the symptoms.  The hardest part for her was learning she was capable of controlling something that had been controlling her for years.  This may not work for you or for anyone else for that matter but my wife has had less panic attacks this past year then she used to have in one day a few years ago.  I wish you luck and remember that patience is the key.  Educate yourself and then your girlfriend.  It is not something easy to accept that you may need to be medicated or have someone tell you there is something mentally wrong with you (or your daughter).   Again, I am no doctor...no doctor told me to do this but something my GF (wife now) and I were able to accomplish.  That was our first big step.

Having her talk to someone with a similar condition may help.  Have her go online even here or other forums to get different viewpoints.  Have her find a support group...or maybe you should go to one and then get her to go.  Also, there is no magic pill as far as drugs are concerned.  I was not with my wife when she went thru it but to say it was no fun for the trial and error it would have been an understatement.