Pediatric Anxiety 6 year old

My 6 year old has anxiety with school, since preschool. He always tries to escape the school grounds.  Usually after a few days or weeks with Kindergarten, he calmed down still making me pinky swear I will pick him up. Now first grade second day, he's escaped twice (not safe) and is starting to hit me and the teacher. The principal took him under her control yesterday and we meet with her afterschool to talk about the issue. All night I spoke with my husband and son about positives with school. He even mentioned positives and told us his day. Problem is getting him to stay in class. I can't hold the door closed forever and the principal will not allow this to continue.

[greenlydia]

Problems with 6 year olds are really out of my league, even tho I raised two sons of my own, it's been many, many years since they were that age.
I don't want to offend you by suggesting this, and actually I'm a bit surprised the principal hasn't brought it up already, but I believe your son needs to be evaluated by a child psychiatrist regarding his behavior. (Most school districts have a child psychologist on staff)  In my humble and totally non-medical opinion, this is NOT normal 6 year old "acting out." I think there is something much more serious going on and with the principal putting the pressure on you about not allowing this to continue, I would make an appointment as soon as possible.
I wish you the very best.
Peace
Greenlydia  

[nora006]

Ok. This can easily escalate so it would be important to get down to what is the REAL causes for his anxiety. You say yourself he doesn't feel safe. Would a grown up person ever stay in a place he doesn't feel safe? He would have the opportunity to leave the place, an option your son clearly does not have, but he still tries to escape. The hitting is surely a signal of frustration. He's not being understood and he's afraid.
What makes him so afraid he can't stay in class? This is the crucial question.
Are there issues with his peers, are there other unsolved issues that may influence his behaviour?

He needs to feel trust. Anxiety can easily fester and grow stronger and therefore it's important to not let it escalate into a feeling of being imprisoned in school. School shouldn't become a jailhouse. That will only worsen his distrust.

I hope the principal and teacher are sensible people who are going to cooperate with you and your child to find out what is really the problem and what will make him feel safe(r) in a place that he has to spend most of his hours and days for many years to come yet.



With kind regards,

Nora