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(Prayer Post)
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(Prayer Post)

I'm sorry I'm just losing it and absolutely needed to further get it out with a post.My right side is hurting alot on and off in the same places. Even my back is hurting on the other side as well as the middle of my stomach and chest area. It's reoccurring..coming and going then always in the same place. My lymph nodes are hurting bad and won't let up. I'm extremely tired. To boot with this cyst or lesion they found in the CT scan... I am losing it...... I realize Google-ing is the devil for us anxiety sufferers and considered a no no but couldn't resist. So what I found is all bad with this pain with the same things being said on several different sites. >>>The cyst does NOT cause any pain unless it grows big which mine has not and was just diagnosed with it and it is only 10 cm or 10 mm..not sure which.<<< The Doc said the same thing...there is supposed to be no pain with it...but there is. So upon Google-ing it I read on several sites that stated the same things as each other. It's all signs of something serious and fatal in one way or another. It could either possibly be liver cancer, hepatitis, or liver failure. Then I read this woman's post on a forum. She stated her father was diagnosed with a 2 cm or mm cyst( even smaller then mine) and he was later diagnosed with liver cancer and died within a year!!!  All of these people who had gotten it or knew someone who had it all died within a year more or less. So treatment is basically pointless and ineffective with how aggressive this is. At least hepatitis seems to be manageable. Over all of this? Gimme thyroid cancer instead of all the other things. (sighing) Please Medhelp friends, please say a prayer for me to be healthy. I would love nothing more even over curing anxiety to just be healthy to get you blessings to grow old even if I was still miserable with anxiety to see my baby daughter grow as well as begin to crawl and talk then knock out recording albums and release them to see what happens with music. :(  27 just wouldn't be long enough for any of this if this is one of these things:( P.S. Would anyone recommend a biopsy of the liver? Is that dangerous? This women stated something about a certain bloodtest on that site, is anyone familiar with something called an AFP test?
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Hey Sweety. It's your friend Remar. You will be getting tests very soon so hopefully you will also get some answers very soon. Make sure to ask about your gall bladder, okay.
You know I'm praying for you.
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Hey there my friend, yes....we got in as soon as I could..not as soon as I would've liked and seems this is moving too slowly for how serious this could possibly be which is unnerving. This Dr. is GREAT about getting tests done. Although it seems he is unfortunately wanting to blame the liver area pain, the sore lymph nodes, fatigue and weakness on my anxiety and saying it is probably psychological (said that when you dwell on a certain organ or area of your body too much that it will hurt) which is troublesome but am grateful that he has decided to run a few tests anyway. A little bit of kinda comforting news is that people have said if worst comes to worst and I am screwed that there is always morphine and are drug induced comas administered to knock you out until you go...so you don't have to suffer or have to know when it is happening until you are gone. Hope this is true just in case but don't know. Sure would be the way i'd be longing to go...sounds alot nicer to just go to sleep. Don't know if this is true but hope so.What better of a way to deal with such an otherwise agonizing demise? Sorry to go into this on such a heavy level. Time for good news! Haha. Luckily he is aware that if it isn't psychological that it is not a good sign either way and have told him that there has been liver pain even while I was sleeping or right out of bed and held it on him that he has said through and through that liver cysts do not cause any pain until they get bigger and that there IS pain...so with the pain that IS going on whether or not he thinks it's psychological or that it is anxiety he was willing to order an AFP liver screening as well as CBC blood tests to check the blood count then ordered an U.S. to further check it out. It is unfortunate because they were not able to fully diagnose this since the lady doing an M.R.I had me doing some funky breathing methods to breath in, then out then in again but then hold your breath which caused me to hyperventilate and seize up. We had to stop the procedure before she could complete it. HAHA it seems as if a higher power is seriously going out of it's way to screw everything up so bad because they said that last part of the test with the liquid that they pump into you to illuminate your body in the scan or whatever, that it is the most important part of the test in truly seeing the area of concern! Ah well,we can only try to do our best in certain situations, right? Hey and good advice about the gall bladder but stupid me has been so overwhelmed that asking about the gallbladder was completely forgotten. Thank you so much for your reply. Thank you very very very much for the prayers. It seems a miracle and prayers from others with more faith then me are 100 percent needed in this time of chaos suffering and uncertainty .... again;thanking you deeply from every fiber of my heart.
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