Severe Anxiety- going crazy?

Lately I've been having these "shifts" in which, remembering them, I feel rather insane and like I'm losing my grasp on reality. I'm severely depressed, I have been for many years. But usually it is comfortable, safe. That sounds strange- how can I feel safe when thinking the thoughts that come with depression?- but it's difficult to describe.  Lately, it has been happening more often, that I shift from the safe feeling into pure panic. I can almost physically feel it happening. In my mind, everything becomes completely different. The world seems like a horror show, the people, monsters. I'll be terrified of everyone, seeing all people as 'the enemy', and I feel separate from the world, completely out of it. This can last for a while, and I usually just sit around feeling ill and crying on and off. It is completely horrible alongside school, because I get so terrified of going to school in that state that I can't think straight. It makes no sense, but it is happening increasingly often. Right now, I'm kind of warding it off, but I'm already starting to feel panic at the thought of having school tomorrow. I can't see a doctor because I can't trust anyone, especially my parents. (That isn't a part of my anxiety..my parents honestly use any sign of mental illness against me, so I can't let them know.) What should I do? I have no one but myself and I'm so terrified when this happens.

[miche31263]

Can you talk to your school counselor?  I have a 15 yr old son, and I can tell he has anxiety with school too.  I would hate it if he couldn't talk to me.  I am so sorry your having this, but there are people out there that can help.  I think a school counselor will talk to you confidentially... Try to think positive and seek help.