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Should I be seeking help?

I have been going through quite a bit of anxiety for what feels like a very long time but haven't quite been able to identify my symptoms until recently. I am also debating whether I should be seeking professional help or continue relieving my symptoms by exercising almost daily. A very close friend of mine takes Xanax whenever her anxiety level spikes and tells me that this "miracle pill" has saved her life.
I worry about the same things again and again, mostly when I wake up in the morning. These thought are usually morbid. My aging parents live in a different state and the thought of them passing away makes me sick with worry. I'm also the mother of an only daughter and I worry daily about her being left alone in this world the day her dad and I pass away. I also worry about my daughter going away to college far from home and missing her.
I usually wake up feeling very anxious and plagued with all kinds of negative thoughts, my heart often racing. These symptoms eventually disappear the minute I get up and go about my business. I do otherwise function well throughout the day when I'm at work and interacting with colleagues.
I also often feel social anxiety but try to beat it by pushing myself to go out and socialize although I would usually prefer to  stay home. On the other hand I'm always ready to socialize with my close friends.

I know deep down that I don't always feel right and that I need to do something about my situation but I also worry about being dependent on a "miracle drug" that promises to solve my problems.

Where should I start?

Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.
16 Responses
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Avatar universal
Perhaps you have heard the saying , He who forgets the past is doomed to repeat it in the future. To which I add, he who dwells on past events that cause anxiety is doomed to repeat anxiety in the future. So it can be a tightrope walk managing the past.
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Avatar universal
oops Birdie...Just saw your message..These are good suggestions..Also, it is true that rehashing the past is useless but I was trying to understand the origin of these unresolved feelings and thinking that they might partly be the cause for the way I react about certain things. Thanks again for your input..
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Avatar universal
Reading some books on cbt or philosophy from a library will not impact your budget. I like the ones with people's experiences or test sections so you can see the connections with your life and others.
Living in the past is not beneficial so I would try to focus on the now. That might be easier said than done, depending on your outlook, but that is what the books and therapy are for - to try to help the focus from useless that makes anxiety to useful.

The past is irrelevant and the future may never come, so all we have is the now.
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Avatar universal
Birdie, I'm looking into these resources and they actually exist at lower or no cost. My insurance only covers me for a few sessions and I know that I will be needing longer term help.
Don't worry, I didn't misinterpret your last post. I understand that exercising and being creative only help me deal with the symptoms, sometimes for an entire day but I also need to have the reasons for my anxiety addressed in a more serious way and learn to reason myself.
One thing I'm starting to do is try to identify the reasons I feel the way I do and I have discovered through some soul searching that some of these  issues go back to my childhood. For example, my social anxiety could be result of growing up with a mother who mostly cared and still does about what people think and what is expected from me and my siblings so as to not create waves. We were forced to attend events and parties that I had no interest attending and I remember feeling a ton of anxiety. Also, she was a master at making me feel guilty about the way I felt. Nowadays no one, not even my husband can push me into being in a position where I feel stuck. I realize that I've been taking this thing a little too far but it is like a knee jerk reaction. Unfortunately my reaction can also alienate my personal relationships. Starting to do some individual soul searching is actually helping me but I also realize the need to turn this negativity into positive and productive thinking with some professional help.
I'm so happy to have found such a supportive community and also glad to see that I'm not alone struggling to make sense of these feelings. It is no fun at all and I sometimes feel completely misunderstood but I'm also willing to take the necessary steps to feel better..

Thanks for your concern..
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Did you find out if cheap mental services are available? My last post wasn't intended to say the below advice you got from nursegirl was not a good idea, since exercise only treats the symptom - It was more intended to say that since exercise is healthy and works for you, it is the best way to cut your anxiety but it doesn't deal with the issues that create anxiety.

"Really, the BEST way to manage anxiety is to work on changing the way we think and react.  You're doing a lot of "what if" thinking, which is typical with anxiety.  A good therapist will help you learn how to dismiss those what if thoughts instead of fueling them.  Really, it's basic conditioning.  We have to condition ourselves not to worry ourselves into a frenzy, ESPECIALLY over things that are out of our control (like worrying about dying, etc). "
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Avatar universal
Thanks for the info Birdie! I live out in sunny California so I can easily exercise all year round. I'm also member of a fitness club where I swim 3 times a week and when I don't swim I usually hike. I loved reading what your doc said, that exercise is comparable to 2 Ativans. This only confirms the benefits of exercising since it allows your body to release endorphins and reduces your stress level. Indoor climbing sounds like a lot of fun and I agree that you should enjoy the type of exercise you get into so you can do it on a regular basis and reap the benefits. It's not always easy for me to fit it into my busy schedule but I make a conscious decision to do so because if I stay more than 1 day without it  I usually feel sluggish, out of sorts and anxious.
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Avatar universal
My post had errors so was deleted, Here is a link saying " The potential for misuse among those taking Zanax for medical reasons is controversial with some expert reviews stating that the risk is low and similar to that of other benzodiazepine drugs[3] and others stating that there is a substantial risk of abuse and dependence in both patients and non-medical users of alprazolam and that the pharmacological properties of alprazolam, high affinity binding, high potency, having a short elimination half-life as well as a rapid onset of action increase the misuse potential of alprazolam.[10][15] "
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xanax

More to the point since you seem to not need it, if you enjoy exercising that may continue to be your best therapy. I hate weights but it was my boring routine in the frozen north in the winter that I had anxiety. Perhaps that is why I couldn't get any benefit from exercising, and even had to take the occasional Ativan during some workouts to keep the anx down. I love indoor wall-climbing now and note the mental high that lasts for a while afterwards as you mention - doc said exercise is comparable to 2 Ativans but maybe you have to like the exercise for the chemistry to work, lol.
What is your country - you didn't fill in your profile which helps sometimes.
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Avatar universal
nursegirl,

Thanks again for your words of encouragement. I will look into the various resources offered by the county I live in.
I will also let you know how things turn out for me and take you up on your offer to pm you for advice. You are indeed a very caring nurse..
Helpful - 0
480448 tn?1426948538
You have a very positive attitude, that will take you VERY far in this.  

Have you looked into what resources are available to you?  You'd be surprised, most counties offer mental health services that would include seeing both a psychiatrist and a therapist for free, or for a nominal cost.  You can do some searching for your county and make some phone calls.

If you could receive services from BOTH the doc and the therapist, that would be great, because you'd kill two birds with one stone, and be able to discuss the possibility of trying an anti-anxiety medication when you need it while you're getting started in therapy.  There's no reason you can't use both, we're just telling you to be cautious, you seem to have a good head on your shoulders, and now you know that if you are prescribed something like Xanax, there are some special considerations.

Let us know what you find out...I think you'll be pleasantly surprised at what you find.  If you need any help searching for resources, shoot me a private message, and I'll give you a hand.
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Avatar universal
birdie,

For some reason, I can't seem to find the second note you sent me with a website link. It looks like it disappeared for the page. Would you kindly resend it to me?

Thank you!!
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Avatar universal
JazzyLorene,

I am certainly not offended by your comment. In fact I am thankful for it and really hope you can also eventually win that battle without the use of Xanax or other benzos. It is hard because the mind can play such nasty tricks on us. I have found that exercising not only wards off my anxiety  but also helps me greatly when I'm feeling blue. The benefits can sometimes last a whole day. It is worth having a daily exercise routine even if it is a 20 minute brisk walk. Wish you the best..
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Avatar universal
nursegirl6572,

Thank you so much for your advice. Therapy sounds like a very good idea. Unfortunately I can't really afford it at the moment. The reason why I have been so reluctant to take meds is because I don't usually medicate except for the occasional Tylenol. I would however consider that option if I had no other choice. I agree with you that ultimately the best way to beat anxiety is to teach yourself how to react to certain situations by conditioning your mind to think in a certain fashion. I will keep trying...
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
birdie0907,

Thank you so much for your input and encouraging comments. Beating these anxiety spells can be a struggle for me but I am usually an optimistic and positive person and I can't stand wallowing in misery. These feelings are very much out of my control but I  try hard to steer away from them.
I did read that Xanax and Ativan are short term solutions and work better if taken sparingly. My mom has been taking Ativan for as long as I can remember but she only takes a tiny dose before going to sleep. In her case, she mostly takes Ativan because she has trouble sleeping. I also know that my mom is a highly anxious person. I on the other hand have no sleep issues. I also don't have an addictive personality so I think that I would probably only pop a pill when things get too difficult for me to handle.
I really like your advice as to what to do when I wake up in the morning with feelings of anxiety. I have found that for me lingering in bed makes it worse. So, the minute I open my eyes I usually jump out of bed and starts my day so I can avoid letting these thought take over my brain.
Helpful - 0
480448 tn?1426948538
Hello and welcome!  Glad you found us and reached out for some answers!

Do you want the good news or bad news first?  The bad news is that there IS no "miracle" drug to treat anxiety unfortunately.  Medications like Xanax CAN be used as PART of an anxiety treatment plan, but they don't "cure" or "fix" anxiety.  

The GOOD news is, you've already got a good foundation of coping skills to deal with your anxiety.  You're pushing yourself in social situations where you're experiencing anxiety, and you're able to keep the anxiety at bay once you get busy and distracted with your day.

Really, the BEST way to manage anxiety is to work on changing the way we think and react.  You're doing a lot of "what if" thinking, which is typical with anxiety.  A good therapist will help you learn how to dismiss those what if thoughts instead of fueling them.  Really, it's basic conditioning.  We have to condition ourselves not to worry ourselves into a frenzy, ESPECIALLY over things that are out of our control (like worrying about dying, etc).

You may also benefit from an anti-anxiety medication like Xanax, to help you in those moments when anxiety is very high, but again, it won't fix the problem, and it's not a reasonable long term solution.  If you've never sought professional help for your anxiety, that's where you need to start.  You could ask your doctor for a referral to a therapist.  I truly think you would fair very well with therapy alone, as like I said, you've already got a good foundation to build on.  If you want to discuss the possibility of trying a medication, then speak to your doctor about it as well, just proceed with caution.  

The most optimal way to use a short term rescue med like Xanax is either "as needed", where you would ONLY take it when anxiety is high, not regularly, or for a short term course of treatment, which is usually a few weeks.  Anything beyond that taken regularly, there are issues to contend with, one being tolerance, where you would need a higher and higher dose to maintain the same level of efficacy, and also dependency, where your body gets used to having the medication on board.  That would cause you to experience w/d symptoms if the medication was discontinued abruptly.  

Plenty of people (myself included) have taken these kinds of medications with little or no problems, that again depends on how they're taken.  It's the people who take it regularly who end up running into problems, and they soon find that the very medication they turned to to help their anxiety will eventually make it worse, with the tolerance issues.  It's just something you have to be cognizant of going into.

I wish you the best, please keep in touch and let us know how you're doing, and let us know if you need anymore info.  You're definitely NOT alone!
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Avatar universal
Dont take this in an offensive way but you seem like uve overcome this anxiety for the most part! You sounds like you can keep yourself busy and avoid the feeling other than in the morning. I hope i can get to tht point one day. My doc perscribed me xanaxs but im afriad to b addicted to them but everyone is different. U may need jst smething like tht to take away the feeling wen it strts building up.
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Avatar universal
An optimist would say that Xanax is a bit of a miracle drug, in that it can provide very quick relief at least for most people. A pessimist would say that it is not a miracle drug because it just treats the symptom. The problem with drugs like Xanax and Ativan is that you have to use them sparingly to try to avoid dependency and addiction problems. Also your body can get used to it so it may require higher doses with time.

Other than those rough mornings where you are focusing on morbid thoughts, you are a bit of a role model for people wondering how to deal with anxiety. You might be able to avoid the morbid beginnings, if you make a plan the night before that the second you wake up you will do something that focuses your mind on pleasant thoughts. The fact that you are able to throw the problems behind when you get out of bed plus you exercise to relieve anxiety means that you have a will to win and are winning the battle against anxiety.

Perhaps the wake-up plan could involve reading a list or a book of happy thoughts, or maybe a happy photograph.
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