Something to lighten the mood

Either I'm going to be hated for this or not, but I got an idea after looking at the picture momeluv put in her profile:
http://www.medhelp.org/user_photos/show/30934

So anyone else know any good fart jokes?  I was thinking it'd be nice to have some humor for a change. That may help us for a brief time to forget the anxiety.

[MrGreen]

A fart it is a pleasant thing,

It gives the belly ease,

It warms the bed in winter,

And suffocates the fleas.




A fart can be quiet,

A fart can be loud,

Some leave a powerful,

Poisonous cloud




A fart can be short,

Or a fart can be long,

Some farts have been known

To sound like a song......



A fart can create

A most curious medley,

A fart can be harmless,

Or silent , and deadly.




A fart might not smell,

While others are vile,

A fart may pass quickly,

Or linger a while......




A fart can occur

In a number of places,

And leave everyone there,

With strange looks on their faces.




From wide-open prairie,

To small elevators,

A fart will find all of

Us sooner or later.




But farts are all bad,

Is simply not true-

We must never forget.......

Sweet old farts like you!

[melissajean]

MrGreen that was cute and funny thanks for that.
and MJIthewriter, thank you for posting this thread, it is very helpful for a laugh...or several teehee. :)

[cell88]

lol love it

[Pum]

My grandmother always used to say "better an empty house than a bad tenant"

[MJIthewriter]

I don't have any jokes but some personal experiences as a child. *blush* as well as some funny bug- human comparisons.

One day I was standing and all of a sudden let out a really high pitched one... My parents heard it too. I asked them, "Why is my butt whining?"

Being into insects, especially ants I learned how they leave pheromones (sent trails) by emitting gasses from the tips of their abdomens on the ground. Those chemicals are picked up by the other colony members. Those trails can lead the ants to food, prepare them for battle, or just let them know whose nest it belongs to.

Well at some point I got the brilliant idea that if I was farting then I must be leaving a trail just like the ants.  My parents got a good laugh when I said something about leaving a trail so they can find me.

Oh yeah Moths: some females leave scents that can be sniffed out by males for miles. So essentially a moth fart must be a potent one for another moth…  I guess potent human farts have the opposite effect.

[scaredjo]

that was ace mr green really good. brought a smile to my face anyway!!
i love it if my nan farts shes 84 and always says theres thunder in the air, makes me laugh when the dog farts she looks at her *** as if to say "were the hell did that come from" bit different if my hubby farts though that aint funny we all leg it haha

[ativan]

LOL,
ive had to write that one down,
janis.