The Strangest Feeling

[cookies12]

Hello everyone.

I'm new to this forum and was wondering if you could help.  All my life, even when I was little, I've been afraid of getting a disease--cancer or brain cancer is the biggest. Throughout my life I've had strange symptoms that would usually force me to go to the doctor.  Once I did, I'd be fine. However, as I got older, I realized doctors CAN misdiagnose.  I've been diagnosed with OCD/anxiety. I went through a hard time last year when I thought I was schizophrenic and heard things sometimes and got evaluated by my therapist. Of course, I wasn't and that passed.  I studied abroad in the fall and was constantly stressed and anxious about my family and boyfriend back home, as well as freaking out about health because I didn't trust the doctors there. I was always uneasy and panicked. I eventually went through a month of CONSTANT panic about death.  When I got back it got better but I continue to be stressed.

When I got back from Italy, I went through a weeklong ordeal of being sore and I thought I had Leukemia.  I went to the doctor and he took blood and everything was good. I figured it was dehydration, stress, or caffeine.  Then it went away. NOW, I have another problem.  I vaguely remember getting this feeling when I was younger, but it's never stayed this long.  A few days after going to the doctor, I was bending down to put something in the fridge and it felt like I was moving in slow motion--or as if I was moving underwater. This has been happening ever since (over a month ago) and I'm constantly worrying about it.  Now, I try to avoid bending down or go slow when I do.  Sometimes I get it when I'm just moving--it's like I'm going in slow motion OR moving underwater (and I also get that "falling" feeling like when you're on a ride with it in my stomach). It's the strangest, indescribably feeling.  I went to the doctor and he listened to my concerns and did a basic exam--checked my lymph nodes, behind my eyes with the light, made me close my eyes and stand up with my arms outstretched in front of me and nudged me a little.  He thought I was pretty healthy. I even see a therapist and she tells me it's anxiety because I am still going through a TON of stress right now.  My best friend, who's known me even says I've always had some ailment.  I'm to0 scared to try medication and I want to overcome this without it.

It happens all the time now, even when I'm not thinking about it and that's what scares me.  I figured that if it were all in my head, it would only come if I thought about it, not when I'm having fun.

So, if any of you could please give me some insight or if you've felt this way, please tell me.  I hope I described it alright.  It is really so hard for me to describe.  

Thanks so much.

[cookies12]

How do you cope or deal with it? I'm afraid this isn't ever going to go away :( It's been happening for such a long time, even if I'm feeling good and not thinking about it.

[AO111]

Anxiety can do so many weird things to you physically. I've had the sensation that I'm sinking into the floor or that the floor just suddenly dropped from under me about two inches. I can understand your worries that there is always something wrong with you. I have health anxiety as well and all the weird things you feel from having anxiety doesn't help matters. I don't know if you research your symptoms online a lot but that's probably one of the worse things to do because you just scare yourself more.

[cookies12]

Thanks for your response!  

But if that's the case, why does it happen so often? Sometimes it happens randomly when I'm wearing lose clothing. :(

[Life360_Dave]

Hi Cookie and welcome. Ive had the same feeling bending down and attributed to the fall of blood pressure. When we wear tight belts or tight pants, it can cut off our circulation of the blood going to our head. Its like riding on a roller coaster where the blood flow is being affected. All very normal to me.

When i have fear of getting a disease i think of those that really are sick which helps me thank God that im ok
The thing ive learned about life is that its not about me but its about us. The more i focus on myself the more im concerned with things i have no control over.