Aa
A
A
Close
Blank
Avatar universal
Toilet Anxiety
I really really need some help please. I am a 34 year old man suffering from a terrible phobia of not being able to get to a toilet. I am worried that i am going to soil myself. When i am able to use the toilet i dont need to but when i am in a situation where i cant get to a toilet i become desperate and have a major panic attack. It physically feels like i am going to mess myself. This has been going on for 20 years now and i have seen child doctors and hypnotherapists. I recently went to the doctors who informed me that i should go privately as the NHS probably wont have the resources to help me. This is really taking over my life now and will do anything to have a "normal life" without worrying if i have been to the toilet enough and if i am now "empty."
Any advice would be greatfully appreciated.

Many thanks.
Cancel
10 Answers
10 Answers
Page 1 of 1
370181 tn?1428180348
If you do not have a medical condition to substantiate this fear, you absolutely need to get into therapy. That you have endured this for 20 years is remarkable, to say the least.
Being in the UK, you are, no doubt, going to have to get on a waiting list. Get your name on one ASAP. You've suffered long enough.
I wish you the very best
Peace
Greenlydia
Comment
Cancel
370181 tn?1428180348
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
134578 tn?1455656688
Phobias come on as a way of dealing with more general anxiety -- believe it or not, it is easier to be fearful of a phobic thing than to be generally fearful, no matter how inconvenient the phobia is.  When you get to a counselor, see about getting a prescription to an anti-anxiety medicine like Zoloft or Paxil.  It could be the simple thing that makes 100% difference.  Good luck.
Comment
Cancel
134578 tn?1455656688
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
1118884 tn?1338596450
Ok.  Let me make sure I understand your situation.  When you are out and far from a bathroom, you 1)feel high anxiety, and 2) a sudden urge to defecate.  Am I right?

You have had this fear for 20 yrs?  Altho' you have both the fear and the urge, you have never had an accident?

This is a miserable way to live.  I know, as an anal cancer survivor and someone who has struggled with anxiety and panic attacks, what the reality is. Your worst fears are my every day companions. I've learned to face the fear and get out. I won't let my condition keep me locked in my apt.  

I'm only sharing my story as I have had close calls and accidents.  Can usually cover until I get home.  So I am living proof that the worst case scenario won't kill you!  LOL.

Best luck.  Hope you can find a medication that will help.  Therapy is always a good idea.




Comment
Cancel
1118884 tn?1338596450
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
Avatar universal
Yes thats right. I have the urge and anxiety that i will defecate when i cannot get to a toilet for instance if i am on a ride at an amusement park or if i am in a car with someone else driving. I would love to fulfill my dream to become a pilot but am unable to do this as i am unable to train in a two seater plane as there is no toilet. I have even thought about purchasing a "but plug" to block my back passage as an answer to this problem. Any other ideas????
Comment
Cancel
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
370181 tn?1428180348
Have you ever actually defecated in public?
Butt plug....................bad idea
Psychiatrist................good idea
Comment
Cancel
370181 tn?1428180348
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
1118884 tn?1338596450
Can't add anything to greenlydia's last post.  
Comment
Cancel
1118884 tn?1338596450
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
Avatar universal
Do something to fulfill your dream of becoming a pilot, it's wonderful.  My husband is a pilot and we are airport bums, flying all weekend.  If you get a 4 place, you could hang a curtain and put in a little camping potty.  I doubt you'd need it but it will help with your anxiety.  Just make sure whomever is in the right seat can handle the plane, which is easier than driving a car.  I hope you get help so you can realize this dream.  Take care!
Comment
Cancel
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
396332 tn?1320007215
a butt plug?
Comment
Cancel
396332 tn?1320007215
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
370181 tn?1428180348
The name pretty much says it all.
Comment
Cancel
370181 tn?1428180348
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
134578 tn?1455656688
There are also Depends (disposable adult diapers).  It's not necessary to go around one's whole life in them, however, if one can see a therapist and take care of the anxiety.
Comment
Cancel
134578 tn?1455656688
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
Your Answer
Avatar universal
Answer
Know how to answer? Tap here to leave your answer...
Answer
Submit Answer
A
A
Blank
Anxiety Tracker
Track Anxiety Symptoms
Start Tracking Now
Top Anxiety Answerers
675718 tn?1449992146
Blank
El Paso, TX
358304 tn?1409713092
Blank
na, MO
Avatar universal
Blank
Arlington, VA
Avatar universal
Blank
MI
Avatar universal
Blank
973741 tn?1342346373
Blank
Anxiety Community Resources
RSS Expert Activity
233488 tn?1310696703
Blank
Marathon Running Done Over Many Yea...
May 21 by John C Hagan III, MD, FACS, FAAOBlank
233488 tn?1310696703
Blank
New Article on Multifocal IOL vs &q...
May 21 by John C Hagan III, MD, FACS, FAAOBlank
748543 tn?1443740527
Blank
TMJ/TMJ The Connection Between Teet...
01/15 by Hamidreza Nassery , DMD, FICOI, FAGD, FICCMOBlank
Top Anxiety Answerers
675718 tn?1449992146
Blank
El Paso, TX
358304 tn?1409713092
Blank
na, MO
Avatar universal
Blank
Arlington, VA
Avatar universal
Blank
MI
Avatar universal
Blank
973741 tn?1342346373
Blank