Why I get panic while dressing up long clothes ?

[dipikakhullar00]

When I undress or dress up I always panic and have fast heartbeat and suffocating feeling .It usually happens when I dress up long cloths like gowns .I feel comfortable when zipper is there otherwise I just loose my control and began to panic a lot over a undressing thing.
I see many people who doesn't have these problems while they are dressing up.

[real_jimmy]

You should wear only the clothes you are comfortable wearing as well as taking off. And all the other clothes that give you anxiety in any way should be either donated or given away in any ways. You could also use them for cleaning surfaces. Sometimes we all need a wardrobe change, buy little and donate others.  New energy is good as long as it is positive. Colors are also responsible for how the clothes make us feel even before we wear them. Always save the safest combinations especially the ones you feel most comfortable in for confusing times when you are not sure what to wear. There will always be times when we hardly wear something we bought with such interest and other times we may wear it after much time elapses, may be the right moment. I have recently developed fondness for acotton kotra type trousers that I find easy cool and comfortable in comparison to jeans.
Take care

[dipikakhullar00]

I agree you are Correct

[specialmom]

Well, some things are easier to solve than others.  Don't wear gowns or clothes that create the anxious issue for you.  However, I'd guess that then something else would surface in its place.  But some things can be eliminated and life goes on quite easily and certain kinds of clothes would be on that list as far as I'm concerned.  Is it where you are going to that also increases the anxiety? Do you have social anxiety?

[Paxiled]

I'm not sure I agree with the above.  If this is an anxiety issue, avoiding will make it chronic.  All therapy for anxiety eventually forces you to face what you've been avoiding, as avoiding makes the disorder worse.  Sometimes avoiding is just the only thing to do, because nothing else works, but if you haven't tried to fix it in any way yet you don't know yet if something will work.  I have a much more severe case of anxiety than most, and I avoid a lot, and my life is very small because of that.  The clothes aren't causing the issue, they are neutral here.  Your mind is creating the problem, the way you're thinking about it.  Avoiding might prove to be the only way to get on with life, but treat it as a last resort.  

[specialmom]

Not sure I agree with that.  Avoiding triggers if very specific like that can work well.  I'd recommend it to try but am fairly certain that is a fixation  of other fears going on.  Cause like . . . or real . . . as a woman, dressing up in long dresses is not really necessary.  Last time I did it was prom.  Easy to eliminate so a chronic fear of long dresses would not impact my life. A fear of events in which I had to dress up, that's different.  So, unless the poster has more to add, a fixated fear is easy to eliminate. And people have different theories on overcoming things and are equally right.

[dipikakhullar00]

Thanks I will look into it.

[specialmom]

Why do you think you have this reaction? What does the dress represent?  Where are you going in the dress?

[dipikakhullar00]

i panic alot while coming out of long dresses that don't have zipper .I feel being trapped .I don't know why this happens.

[dipikakhullar00]

dresses like long gowns etc

[specialmom]

Oh, I got it now.  I have had that feeling too when I want something off that is a little too tight and it is 'closing in on me'.  Like 'get it off now!" type of feeling.  How often do you need to wear these types of gowns?  Is it possible to not buy things like this?  If I have something that makes me feel that trapped feeling about getting it off, I usually donate it to someone I know or Good Will or something.

[dipikakhullar00]

Occasionally I wear these things. It bothers me alot now a days because I am about to get married and my mother in-law tries some dresses on me and when I get panic in getting off with some dresses she doubts on me about me having some problem .I am used to wear comfortable loose clothes &  suddenly things are changing for me .

[dipikakhullar00]

I am Indian you can google what Indian Punjabi people are used to wear.

[Paxiled]

Mom, I do agree with you on your point -- I mean, if you're afraid of roller coasters, avoiding them isn't going to really bother your life.  I was more referring to avoiding things you really want to do or that make your life what you want it to be.  I haven't flown in many years and travel is one of the things that made life meaningful for me, so it was a great loss.  I haven't even been able to get back home for decades.  I never found a way to get better -- meds helped some but never got rid of the phobias I already had, just stopped me from getting new ones.  Therapy never worked for me, but I still recommend it to everyone.  So I agree, if the only problem in her life is long gowns and not wearing them doesn't spread to other areas of her life, you're right, we all have some of those and they don't matter that much.  Not worth the trouble fighting that stuff.  But in this case, and I already guessed she was from India from her name, it's a cultural thing that might not be avoidable without avoiding important other things in life, as she's said, so that informed my response.  But in general you're right on what you said.

[Paxiled]

This is to the poster -- in India there are gowns and there are also outfits that include pants, right?  Are there any of those that are considered formal enough for your needs?  What if you go really old school and do saris?  Are they a problem?  But I still think it would be better if you can fix this way of thinking in therapy instead of avoiding, as it does seem to be bothering you more than, say, not riding a roller coaster.

[Paxiled]

And as to the why of it, it sounds like a bit of claustrophobia.  Do you get claustrophobic in any other settings?

[specialmom]

This all makes better sense now.  PLUS add to it the fact that you are getting married and that is stressful in and of itself.  That is triggering.  And dealing with a mother in law and feeling that pressure?  Sure, that would do it.  And your culture is such that you wear gowns.  Paxiled's ideas of alternatives could be done from time to time?  Agree that it sounds like claustrophobia.

are you excited about the marriage?

[specialmom]

and sorry paxiled about the flying situation.  That's difficult and I can sense what a loss this is to you.  

[dipikakhullar00]

Yes I am excited . Wearing anything is not at all the problem . I can wear whatever I want to but sometimes I really want to wear those fancy ball gowns and other clothes but there my saffocating problem comes. I remember I had split down one top with the help of scissors while I was getting it off. That time I realized how I panicked . Yess of course there is no complusion on me what I have to wear . But I was just finding a solution to that problem .

When marriage is near I think everybody who has some issues must be wanting to solve it before marriage.

[Paxiled]

Mom and I have both been married a long time -- the wedding is the easy part!  Marriage is a wonderful thing, but it doesn't change the nature of life or the nature of how we think about things.  That we have to work on ourselves.  Congrats on your betrothal -- and remember, love is the real thing, not the legal arrangement.  

[Paxiled]

And again, as I think I've done this before, Mom and I are not married to one another, and I'm sure she's thanking God every day for that!

[specialmom]

ha, yes.  No paxiled and I are not a couple although we bicker like an old married couple.  Anyway, I think for some, anxiety can really come into play at the big moments like getting married.  Was this an arranged marriage?  Are you feeling good about things?

[Paxiled]

Mom, we don't bicker, we argue.  Arguing is much higher calling than bickering.

[Paxiled]

I don't really understand, I hope others do but more info might be useful.  Do you suffer anxiety about other things?  Do you have problems with sexual feelings -- undressing and dressing up can make us feel sexy or sensual, is this a problem for you?  I'm asking because I'm trying to figure out if you have a chronic anxiety problem that would indicate therapy would be useful or if this is just one thing in your life that bothers you for some reason.

[dipikakhullar00]

yes I suffer from anxiety.

[Paxiled]

If you've been diagnosed with chronic anxiety by a competent professional, it doesn't really matter what your anxious self focuses on.  It could be anything.  The important thing to focus on is dealing with the anxiety.  The place to start for that if you haven't figured it out on your own and it's been going on awhile is to see a psychologist who specializes in anxiety treatment and start working on getting better.