Women Only! Anxiety while having period.

[CharlieRae]

Hello, I hope this post won't be too long but here it goes.

I have depression and anxiety. But when I have my period the anxiety goes thru the roof. I understand about hormones and irritability and all that. This is not that. I have anxiety over the actual period (blood, cramps, back ache, being uncomfortable, nausea etc.)

I started my period when I was 12, and every month I would dread that time of the month bc I knew my anxiety would go up. I was afraid to go out in public for fear of accidents (just the thought of that makes my heart race and my face turn red) I would be absolutly mortified. I was also afraid that the people around me knew I was on my period. Yes, I know it's an irrational feeling.

I get anxious going to the bathroom because seeing/smelling the blood kinda ‘jars’ me inside. I don’t blood in general just when it’s menstruation. I get more sensitive ‘down there’ when I’m on my period, as I explained before, and the pad touches. It’s very uncomfortable. When I first started my period (age 12) and all the way up until I went on birth control (age 21), I used tampons. But in October when I had my period, I tried to use one, but now it slides out and I get a pain in my stomach if I try to put pressure on the tampon. So I use pads which I never have liked because they feel like diapers (even the slender regular ones).

I have anxiety/dread the physical aspects of it but I have more anxiety/dread more the fact that I know that I will be uncomfortable and not be able to sleep laying down at night which leads to more anxiety knowing I will be up by myself at night while everyone else is asleep which leads to me thinking what if I can’t get enough sleep tonight, then I’ll be more tired than I already am. It just goes on and on and on. One thought and anxiety leads to another thought and more anxiety.  The anxiety snowballs. And crying. Can’t forget the crying that goes along with anxiety!

When I was 21 yrs old (in 1998), I was put on birth control (Depo Provera shot) to shrink ovarian cysts. The shot took away my period. Yay!! I was on the shot for 10 years and didn't have a period so I didn't have to deal with period anxiety. But the shot caused me to gain weight, about 50lbs. So I decided that I wouldn't go back and get another shot. I lost about 30lbs so far!

My period came back in October, and now every month for 7 days my anxiety increases when I go to the bathroom because I know I have to deal with "it." This is probably too much information but I'm so sensitive down there (during my period) that the pad touching "me" is so uncomfortable that I can't sleep and that brings on some anxiety. I've tried tampons but they slide out and it hurts really bad.

So its come down to going back on birth control which would stop my period and the anxiety but gain weight OR staying off the birth control, keep losing weight, and still deal with the anxiety. It's a hell of a choice. I don't know how to deal with it.

My anxiety doesn’t go away after my period. It just goes down to a more manageable level.

I’m sorry this is so long. I was hoping that I could get suggestions about how to deal with this.


Thanks, CharlieRae
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[CharlieRae]

Thanks for your response.

I have thought of having a tubal ligation. I've had numerous surgeries on my spine and am disabled. It is not recommended that I get pregnant because the stress might be too much on my one and only functioning kidney and the pressure on my spine could paralyze me.

Yes, it would be easier if I could just take it in stride. I would if I could but it's just not that easy. I was sexually abused for many years as a child and maybe there is a correlation between sexual abuse, and my anxiety and hatred for periods. I never thought about it that way. I will see about seeing a therapist. This is not the only issue I have.

Thanks again,
CharlieRae

[RubyWitch]

I'm really sorry that aside from the 10 years you were on BC, your periods have been virtual nightmares of anxiety, depression and fear.

I suggest you see your OB/GYN for a complete gynecological exam and then ask to be referred to a female therapist to begin dealing with all the issues surrounding your periods.

There IS one other option. If you already have your children or don't plan on having any, you could consider a tubal ligation. Surgery v therapy may be a tad too radical........you could debate the pros and cons with your therapist.

At 35 you could stll be facing another 20+ years of periods. Wouldn't it be nice to just take them in stride?
I wish you the best
Greenlydia