Would my doctors have found something if something was wrong?? I feel so crazy!

[Rs33]

So I think I have severe health anxiety and also the fear of death....I know were all going to die someday I know I am just scared that I don't know when or how even though I know I will never know. Anyways  I have weird feelings all the time bubbly feelings in my chest, weird vision problems, at the beggining of all this I get this weird pass out feeling like my body is just going to give up....I feel as if sometimes I can't breathe (but I can) I get dizzy too and I just feel over all just weird I think that I am just going to die, from anything heart attack, a seizure, brain tumor you name it. I get weird shooting pains in my legs and arms lots of twtching and a lot of PVCs . So with all this if I had something seriously wrong with me would the doctors would have been able to catch anything I have had blood test which everything comes out normal, several EKGs, chest x-rays, MRI on my head done with and without contrast, Heart Holter monitor for a month. Ct scan of my plevic and abdominal and all I had was ovulation cysts. I still think something is wrong b/c I have far to many symptoms for this to be panic :( I don't know what to do anymore I was seeing atherapist and tried getting on meds but every med I have tried my panic just gets 10xs worse and therapy didn;t help at all...I feel like I am going to loose it :( I have a wonderful life I have no reason to get panic if thats why I am getting it. Right now I feel like there are bubbles in my chest eeerrr I feel like I have tried everything and nothing is helping so I think I am dying of some illness they can't find. I don't know what else to do...I DON"T HAVE SYMPTOMS OF KILLING MYSEFL don't worry I am scared of dying.  My life is perfect I have a lil girl she is 14months old a wonderful husband I mean wonderful  when I feel this way He takes over for me until it passes or I am feeling a lil better,  I am so scared one day he is just going to up and leave me I am a stay at home mom I do everything laundry and cook for him the house rarely gets dirty anyways He ensures me he will never leave me but I hate that he has to deal with this. ANyways can anyone please help reassure me give me advice please Thank  you!!

[cindy1377]

I have all your symptoms and then some. This is a horrible thing to deal with and it ***** that for me it came out of no where... I used to live my life to the fullest trying everything... Doin everything I could. Experiencing new things... Now I spend almost 100% of my day tryin to convince myself this is just anxiety and I'm not going to die... Believe me this is the hardest thing ive ever had to do... It's like I kno exactly what it is but there still isn't anything I can do it still has control over me!. In fact I was having a major attack then I found this and it made me feel better because I haven't ever ran across someone who has the majority of the symptoms I have and feels the same as I... I'm so sorry you have to deal with this with such a young child. My daughter is only 5 and now living with her grandparents because I am unable to take care of her let alone myself at the moment. I wish you the best of luck fighting this from the bottom of my heart and if you ever need to talk or would like a pen pal, someone who is also goin through what you are, you can e m a I l me at Livelovelaugh1377 at g ma il ******* :) I hope I helped even jus in the slightest bit

Sincerely,
Lucinda

[Rs33]

It is def a control issue...going to the store is hard work for me it stresses me out to the max b/c I think I might die either just pass out and die or actually get in a car accident its soo sad I still do those things b/c I have too I have no choice but man does it stress me out and I think thats where the panic sets in now. I know I am going to die we all do but I still can't get it in my head I will be fine and if it happend it happends I can't control any of it only god can I know that but my mind oes not like that Idea so its a horrible horrible cycle I get into....on top Of that I have all these symptoms and I think I am gunna die of a disease of some sort! UUHH How did you get over it?

[jerrywwe]

Hey. I dealt with a fear of death for YEAARS! I never thought I would get over it. I felt like I was on a one way train for non existence, like life was just an hour glass with the sand falling, like I have NO choice but to DIE no matter what I do. It's a control issue. The fear of inevitability. The fear of having no say in a matter. Look at the elderly. I have NEVER seen an elderly person scared to die. You will go through SO much in this life and remember it's not YOU thats going to die. It will be a a ready, willing, person that has experienced all life has to offer. You will have kids, your kids will have kids and you will age gracefully and get to a point that you will be ready. Death can seem overwhelming, but not when it's put into perspective. I got stuck in a trap, and it consumed me. It doesnt anymore. I am living proof that death is nothing to fear, but worrying about something out of your control is much more scarier.

[Rs33]

Thank you MMahon the reassurance helps me tons. I have tried Ativan Made me angry and more pone to my attacks it felt like I was having them 24/7 no break. and then I took xanax for 3 weeks only and I hated it only b/c I couldn't keep my eyes open even on the smallest dose. After being on those both my panic felt like at an all time high...I then started Zoloft for about 4 days and my panic started getting worse again I had like 6-12 panic attacks in a day which is like tripple what I would get without it. I also tried ambien b/c I was not sleeping I maybe fot 2-3 hours a night over 4-5 months my body was just wearing down I think. The ambien gave me the oppisite effect and my heart started racing I felt like I couldn't breath my HR was at like 150 for 3 hours it finally calkmed down by that time it was 2 am and I get up early with my lil girl so I got about 3-4 hours anyways since getting off everything I have been doing a lot better I get attacks every 3 weeks or so and they last a week or so and then I can feel fine and then it starts all over again....In those time periods I feel as if I need the reassurance b/c I am convinced I am still going to die :/ Especially when I feel like my body will just collapse at any moment with no warning,,,I get that pass out sensation (that was my biggest concern b/c that was my first symptom) I didn't want to pass out so I panic. then I get all the other symptoms my symptoms change daily when I am going through a cycle of panic I could have tingly all over my body to twitching constanly everywhere or just achey feeling all over to a lump feeling in my throat....I hate trying to explain everything to my doctors b/c I have had it all it seems like and sometimes worse...Plus I convince myself its not panic b/c I get that pass out feeling and bubbly feeling in my chest and None of my doctors have said that this is normal nor have they met someone that has this pass out thing so it makes me concerned. and more fearful anyways thanks for all of that it makes me feel better I just feel like when I saw a therapist it kept bringing back memories of my panic and it would make it worse and I hated that fact. I am also scared b/c I would like another child but I am terrified b/c I thin ksomething bad might happen anyways thanks for reading. Oh and I did see a phychiatrist and she recomended all of those for me I feel like the therapist and the physchirtist just werent listening there life were tii busy one would be on the phone for a couple of min in the middle of our convo and my therapist would yawn occasionally so it mad me feel like why am I here I will just do this on my own. Thanks for everything you guys it helped I just liked to be reaassured I would feel more comfortable if I found someone with my symptoms. :) This site is a blessing thanks!!

[29sillygirl]

Your fear of death may be normal for your age.  It is of no concern to me as I have lived my life.  When you are young it can be threatening.

Considering you have symptoms of anxiety, but do have a husband and child to care for, a med to calm the extreme fears may help.

The only way you will get relief is to check in with a shrink.  The meds are trial and error for sure.  But a good doctor will work with you: listen to you, and together you will find the right one for you.

[MMahon]

What you describe seems quite typical for anxiety/depressive disorder.
Tranquilizers don't help you with the anxiety and panic?  Do you see a psychiatrist?
FEAR is a dominant feature with anxiety and depression...it's what make it a real hell.
It's very difficult to believe that anxiety and depression can have the severe physical effects that they do.. We all have normal anxiety and get depressed so that's all we have to relate to so when we're told we have those 'disorders' we don't realize it's something totally different then that.  You don't have to have something to be anxious or depressed about to be suffering the symptoms of the illness.
I don't know much of your medication experience but frequently people are given meds by a GP and when they don't work, another is tried, and you eventually get fed up with effects you have from them.   Some people need to be started off on much smaller doses then the standard dose and build up gradually.  Taking too much at the beginning can steer you from a medication that may well be the best one for you and you never get the chance to find out.
SSRI's are frequently the drug of first choice these days.  None of them ever worked for me and I gave them a good trial.  I know how frustrating that can be but there are a lot of medcations out there and we frequently have to go thru a few to get the right combination.
Why is it that this illness has to be the one that is such an inexact science to get relief for?
Our nervous systems are so poorly understood.  These medciations have been around for decades and their action is hardly understood.  Yet they can and do provide relief for the symptoms if they are administered in the proper fashion.  
Only you can determine what the proper course of action is for you.  
My recommendation would be to find a psychiatrist (or new one).  Let him know exactly what you are going thru, what meds you tried, their dosages and length of time you tried them, what therapy you have had and how that went.  DONT give up in finding some help.  You don't have to accept living with the symptoms you have unless YOU choose to.  You deserve to be better able to enjoy the blessings you have.
Sorry for being so long winded!!