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heart races, always worrying
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heart races, always worrying

i am 18 years old, and iv been having panic attacks like this since i can remember.
i used to be on ritalin when i was younger, but after a couple years i was taken off cause my mom saw me as a zombie. Though now my panic attacks are horrible. im always stressed out and expecting something to happen. my health to start, i always feel as if im going to have a heart attack, and thinking about it makes it race even faster making me panic more. if i have a slight symptom of anything i assume the worst, and that i am going to die. im tired of feeling like my life is going to come to an end and it feels like im falling into the depths of hell, i cant see myself being sane in another 10 years. i know its all psychological but i cant seem to beat it. I cant look up when i walk down the street, cause i think people will be looking at me, or i fear just looking stupid all together. i wont take cross walks to get to the other side of the street, instead ill take a longer route just to avoid walking infront of the cars. i dont like to say it, but im in desperate need of help i dont have money for psychiatrist so please dont push that onto me. If you can even relate to my issues that would be great, advice is appreciated thank you everybody
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