how do i stop picking my sores? (AHD, OCD)

[kaylababy]

I am 18 years old and i have ADHD my whole life since i can remember ive been picking my sores it has been controllign my life i have scars all over my body and im so ashamed my mo knows i have ocd but nothing helps ive tries cordezone creams ive tried so any things but failed the only way i find myself able to stop is when im alone and no one is around me to upset me, i dont know what to do anymore, i have never eached out for help

[kaylababy]

Thank you nurse girl and everyone else who'd been helping me i appreciate it beyond belief yesterday i found my grandmothers worry rock and i am using it i havent picked since but y body isnt used to it im shaking, but inside i feel a lot better with myself I'm going to the doctors to get a prescription scar removal and see about trying to erase what I've done with myself

It turns out my step father was the reason i started in the first place i asked my mo when i started and she verified i started to do it when he came into our lives right after he married her also my father was another reason our unhealthy relationship has always been there, he never wanted me around and i remember him having to drag me from under tables to go visit him because i didn't want to be near him as a child, she didnt even want to be there when i was born and besides right after i was a baby i never saw him and he lived 5 minutes away i thought he was a stranger to be truthful and thats why i refused to leave with him. when i actually did go and get to know him i loves him like any daughter would love their father but then Edna came into the picture and my dad ignored me most of my life after that i tried to move in with him and i was with hi a year and a half and we started to get close but Edna didn't want it and she made up stories i was doing drugs and telling my dad i was stealing all these things of hers when he couldn't find them in my room or back pack and it didn't add up because i only went to school and the library in the end he put me in hospital because of the lies she let out. I have never confronted my dad about that incedent i just forgave him to let myself let go and not worry him and denis are what are making me like this and i just need to figure out how to get rid of the effect they gave me.

[nursegirl6572]

First of all, welcome to the forum, and like the above posters told you...you will find loads of support and guidance here.  Don't hesitate to come here and reach out for help in addition to any professional help you seek, which by the way...I think is a decision you won't regret.  You need to start dealing with these unfortunate issues that are buried deep down, and likely manifesting into the picking compulsion.

You can and WILL get through this with some help.  Don't try to do this on your own....you don't have to be a martyr.  It's OK to need help. Be patient with yourself and know that it may be a difficult road ahead, especially once you start to explore the feelings that are plaguing you.  But, with some work, patience, and the right support...you will overcome this and get to a much better place.  It doesn't seem like it now, but better days ARE ahead.

It's NEVER a sign of any weakness or anything to be ashamed about to need help.  There are SOOOOO many people like us out there who deal with these kinds of issues, and there IS help and hope available.  Not to mention, you are a victim of abuse....none of that is your fault, you didn't deserve it, didn't cause it and the best "revenge" is living well.  

We're here for you....and we care.

[kaylababy]

thank you very much im really not used to this type of support, he is gone but my mum stupidly invited him into our hoe 5 years after he was gone ive been set bak majorly by him all my life and i appreciate you saying that regardless of your age or sex

[trdofbeingtrd]

I am sorry to hear this. I hope he is no longer around you. This angers me greatly. I was abused and know how much it can mess someone up.

You will get support here, and if you need to talk, please speak up. There are lots of wonderful people here who give great advice and are here to help people feel better. You can post in the "abuse" community and most likely be surprised at how many people will most likely support you. I am here if you need an ear although I understand if you want someone more your age and a female.

You can get over this, and it is NOTHING to feel ashamed or weird because of. In just my opinion, yes, he is the reason you have this issue. Please let us know if we can help you.

[kaylababy]

yea thats what im worried about but i was kinda thinking my problem may be deeper i started to do it when my stepdad woudl beat me and my mom and ever since i couldnt stop it wasnt so bad until he did that now its worse so i wounder if what he did gave me some post tramatic stress :/

[trdofbeingtrd]

With counselors, and therapists, it's kind of a hit and miss thing. You can get one that is just terrible and just wants a paycheck, or you can get one who truly cares and will go all out to help. Hopefully this next one will do right by you. Here you will find people to share your feelings with, from that, some of those emotions and feelings you have kept in for so long can be let out. Just let us know if you need to talk or get something off your mind.

[kaylababy]

I actually talked to a doctor about the picking but she is sending me to a councillor i have been holding my emotions in for so long its taken a drastic affect on me, she just said uh uh i noticed and is handing me to someone else but i mean she didnt really even say anythign about what is wrong and how to stop

[kaylababy]

Thanks everyone i'll try the stone idea it seems like a good way to get things done i used to read to supress the urdge but i becae a hermti and never left my house so that was a fil XD

[trdofbeingtrd]

That is another thing, I knew there was more, yeah, an anxiety ball. I mean lots of people have either of those two things. I had one somewhere, I think the stupid dog got it......

There will be more people to give advice on this site like Alisonj29, so please stick around kaylababy. We are all here to support each other.

[Alisonj29]

Brilliant advice! A worry stone or even an anxiety ball would be great. My daughter had OCD issues with her face and acne. She didnt have anything on her face but she would feel like something was there and she would pick it apart. It was such a shame. She wore mitts when at home but she was still very compelled to pick. Eventually the doctors put her on a low dose med and gave her a prescription cream(super super low dose for acne but she thought it was a normal prescription cream) and when she applied the cream she believed that everything was ok.
It might be the time to reach out for help. Just let your doctor know and I am sure they will come up with a solution that is right for you. But know you are not alone in it, so dont be ashamed. I wash my hands with bleach till they bleed and crack.

[trdofbeingtrd]

I am sorry you suffer from this.

What you need is a worry stone. (You can find one or buy one) This is one item for the same idea. You need something that is not odd (I am not being mean here, because I am not calling what you do odd, I just mean something that you would feel comfortable with around people, and lots of people have worry stones) You could carry the stone in your pocket, or you could wear it on a necklace. I would think that you would feel better using your physical attention on the stone in front of people than on the sores. My back is scared up and down from terrible acne, it's on my neck and sometimes on my head too. I can't take off my shirt in front of people I don't feel super comfortable with. The idea, is when you are around people, start rubbing the worry stone and it will take the want to pick sores away. I can message you a link to a site where you can buy them for like $3.00. I got lucky and found one along the road.

If I can think of anything else, I will.