I was wondering if anyone here has ever had the sensation of a quivering in your chest. Not your heart, but more centered in your sternum. It just feels like something is wiggling in there. It has been that way before but never this long. It started last night and I could not sleep. I haven't been sleeping at all lately ... I have terrible pvcs when i lay on my right side or my back. Nothing helps me. I am 8 months pregnant and my doctors are useless. I tried Valerian root capsules and Kava Kava capsules, and it must have been my imagination wanting desperately for some relief because now those things have no effect on me at all. I don't think any doctor truly understands what it is like to have intense physical anxiety all the time. none of them can empathize. you can see it in their faces when you ask for help. I can honestly tell you that i would have tried at least once to kill myself had i not been pregnant. that is how wearing this is on me. it owns me. I can't be a mother, a wife, nothing. I can't sleep, I can't eat, I can't do anything. all I do is wish this all would stop or kill me already and get it over with. I used to be able to shoulder the world. now it seems that any stress whether good or bad gets the same terrible reaction from my body ...terrible heart palps, quivering in my chest, dizziness, nausea, inability to focus, or feel anything emotionally. I get tingling on random parts of my body ... I lose the ability to taste sometimes for no reason. I truly am at the end of my pitiful rope. this isn't going to get better ... after i deliver you can pretty much guarantee i'm going to have trouble with post partum depression. I'm already on wellbutrin and it does not a damn thing. but when i tried to stop it, I had such a spike of constant state of panic i had to just take it again. I am so lost. I hate this. I hate being helpless and i hate being looked down upon like i am. I hate feeling weak. i hate not having control over this - and i truly don't. it controls me.
I am sorry that you are going through this. Giving up is never the answer. We have all been there before and you have much more of a challenge then a lot of people do. You are eight months pregnant and are having to deal with this, so it can be so much harder in my opinion.
I am also sorry that your doctors don't seem to relate or empathize with what you are going through. Unfortunately, many doctors are at a loss on how to deal with anxiety. It took me literally a dozen tries to find one that actually tries to understand what I am going through, however, an MD (unless it is a psychiatrist) doesn't really deal with anxiety issues.
Do you have access to talk therapy. For me, finding a counselor that specialized in anxiety did wonders in understanding and confronting it. I know this saps you of all energy and it completely robs you of your self identity, BUT, and this is a big but, you CAN and WILL get them back with understanding of why you are thinking the way the do. I know it may not seem so right now (heck, I was there for a long time), but with patience and understanding I believe you will actually be a more well rounded person for this experience. It made me appreciate the smaller things in life and we learn a lot about ourselves in the down times than in the good; that is what will eventually make the good times great...please keep on asking as many questions as you like.
Are you sure it's not the baby? I could feel mine right below the sternum. I'm so sorry you are going thru this at what should be the happiest time of your life. I would find another psych doctor and start over. There are many good medications out there, and if you haven't tried therapy this would be very beneficial also. You can learn the basis and triggers of your anxiety, as well as coping a relaxation techniques. Please don't give up, you have so much to look forward to with your baby. You deserve a happy life and this can be accomplished, with the right docs. Don't allow anyone or any doctor to make you feel bad for what you are enduring, they are showing their ignorance! You just need to find the right psych, don't even bother telling any other type of doctor because they don't have a clue when it comes to these medications or what you are enduring.
Please stay with us while others jump on here to offer ideas and support. Try to be strong and take care.
As with cj, I am sorry that you are going through all of this now. It is difficult enough being pregnant without the added anxiety robbing you of the joy you deserve to be feeling.
When I was about 8 months pregnant with my first son, I had very similar symptoms as yours with the feeling of "quivering" near the center of my chest, which is where the sternum is. Needless to say, this scared me and caused me to have some very bad panic attacks and heart palpitations. I went to my OB/GYN who ran a few tests and said that the baby was sitting so high that he was putting pressure on my vagal nerve, especially when I laid on my back, that it was causing spasms. I also had real problems with refux, which he again attributed to the babies position causing my esophagus to also spasm. Both of these symptoms went away as soon as the baby dropped and the pressure was removed.
Ask any woman who is 8 months pregnant if she sleeps worth a damn! It's nearly impossible! If you try sleeping on your back, your baby pushes on all those nerves in your back and creates the spasms I talked about, and the reflux. If you try sleeping on your side, it's pretty much the same thing..........the weight of the baby is now pushing on different nerves and all the internal organs on that side. Flipping over just produces the same symptoms on that side. Forget trying to sleep on your stomach. That's like trying to sleep on top of a beach ball. They should just be honest and tell women who are 8 months pregnant that the only way you'll get any sleep at all is to stand up like a horse! I know, not really funny because we ARE exhausted and so badly need the rest for what is coming!
I think a great many of your symptoms are related to your pregnancy, the anxiety and the horrible exhaustion and are exacerbating them out of proportion. I am not, in any way, trying to minimize what you're feeling........I know that feeling of being at the end of your rope, having so many odd and uncomfortable sensations......it's not a good place to be, but I really believe that a long talk with your doctor with help you put many of these feelings into perspective and give you some much needed reassurance that much of what you are feeling is perfectly normal. The best person to do that is your doctor.
I am very concerned that you would speak of suicide and your belief that you WILL suffer with post partum depression. For these reasons, as well as the physical symptoms you are dealing with, I would strongly urge you to see your OB/GYN and discuss the issues you have told us about today. I would definitely talk with him about the Wellbutrin, as there are pharmacieutical precautions regarding taking it while pregnant. This would also be an excellent time to talk about a referral to a good therapist.
Do you have a good support network of friends and family to help you? If so, I would say reach out to them now.
You may also find a great deal of support on our pregnancy forums here............why not take a look and see if there are other yougng women who can relate to what you're going through. But you can always come here.
I believe you are going to be just fine and in a few weeks you will have a beautiful baby to lavish all your love on.
Please stay in touch, OK?
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