what is wrong with meeeee : (

[holliexox]

hey loves

its me again.
i had a doctors appt yesterday and turns out they didnt take our insurccne so i went to stupid urgent care and all they doctor did was give me some stupid tests like watching me walk, stand on one leg and stuff to see if i had an asymererm, he said it doesnt seem like i do but he cant see inside my brain so get an MRI. i cant tho i dont even have a doctor and our insurnce sucks and a MRI would be alot of money.

but lately, ive been feeling tired, not wanting to eat, feeling like i dont want to do anything and i just plain old BLAH. im scared. is this depression? and why would i be depressed? my FIANCE iS COMMING here TOMMRORROW and i havnt seen him in 2months ( we have a long distance relationship) and i SHOULD be happy and exicated. i dont know why all this is happening. im starting to worry about my health again, which i had stopped doing for a while now but now its back again. i feel like this past week, i've been just doing DOWNHILL

:(anyone have any insight on this?!
thanks
love, me

[schwaby]

Suzi,

Have you tried Zoloft?  I went through a bought of depression and anxiety about a year ago and never suffered the symptoms (shortness of breath, didn't care about anything, not getting excited, etc).  My wife was even concerned what my problem was.

When I had my second "panic attack" that's when I listened to the doctor and got on Zoloft.  Now, you can read a million stories about any drug and get good and bad results but the truth of the matter is that it depends on the person.  For me, it was absolutely wonderful, no side effects and its not addictive and you can come off it it in a week.  You have to come off it slowly (cut your pills in half each day) becase you can't suddenly get off of it.

But if you havn't tried it, please ask you doctor.  It straightened me out tremendously.  It take about 2 weeks to get into your system but once it does, you feel like your old self, can handle any strees or any situation, depression is gone, etc.  May take a little longer to work and I was on it for about 7 months.  By month 7, I had my life back into control and told the doctor I was ready to come off it.  Ever since then, I may get an anxious flare up or two but I learned some great breathing techniques that help.

Take care and hope you feel better.

[suzi-q]

To this day I still do not know what triggered my depression and my "awfulizing"  every situation.  My doctor said it is holistic...it encompasses you body mind and soul...because I asked him if mine was physical or psychological.  PLEASE don't be scared.  You will not feel like this forever..you will get better, with or without medication.  It takes lots of time and lots of self talk.  The biggest mistake you are making and I did it to is to beat yourself up for feeling this way.  This is how you feel right now, and it will pass.  Feel your feelings and be kind to yourself.  Best to you and take life minute by minute...I find that helps...don't think of yesterday or of tomorrow, just stay in the now!

[jwinst]

I know what you are going through! I am dealing with bad anxiety myself and it makes me quite depressed! I am also away from my fiance. I was supposed to go visit him yesterday, but my anxiety was too bad and I could not get in the car and drive for hours to get to him. I am so sad and mad at myself!I have not seen him for a month! I am seeing a therapist to help deal with all of this ****. I know you are having insurance issues, but I would suggest you see someone too. You may not need meds. I am not taking any, but talking to someone really helps. I have horrible anxiety about my heart, even though the docs tell me I am ok. I hate all of this as it is preventing me from living my life. But there is hope and help.
You are not alone in this! We can get better!!
Have fun with your fiance!

[holliexox]

im scared:( being depressed scares me.
i dont know why i'd be depresed.

[Pum]

Depression doesn't work like that ie you don't need to have a reason.  I can't remember how old you are but these kind of problems can crop up around times of major life changes.  You have just changed cities right?  Plus around graduation is another time you can get depressed.  the change and the choices can be overwhelming.

Good luck.

[suzi-q]

All of your symptoms that you have been expressing...worring about dying, headaches, anxiety, etc. are ALL symptoms are depression.  That is the weird thing about it...you have no reason to be unhappy, but you are...you are tired, have no enthusiasm for anything.I truly hope you can get to a doctor that can help you. I truly believe that your problems are not medical...I feel that you are healthy...but you need to speak to someone and maybe even get on some meds until you can sort it through...best to you.