in-operable because of severe arthritis

hello, i have severe arthritis among several other health issues. i have fractured hip, spine, nerve damage in low back, neck and both arms. several ruptured disc in back and neck also. my dr will not do a hip replacement for the fracture.  he said the arthritis is so severe that any surgery that is done will be attacked and cause me extreme pain and it will be like i have not had the surgery. has any one else ever had to deal with this problem? i am 49-female. my pain management dr also gave me the option of nerve blocks, but since my condition is severe they leave the decision up to me. my feet swell so bad and i have had to see a specialist and have shots in them just to be able to walk, the pain was so bad that sometimes i had to just about crawl on my hands and knees!  i have not slept in a bed for about 6 years, sleep in recliner, when i can sleep i get about 1-2 hours if i am lucky. i sympathize with any one with arthritis and understand your pain. god bless and thanks for reading. kbe234

[geminigirl1963]

Oh my - you sure have been through a lot!  You must be a very strong person to have gone through all that you have and still be able to put one foot in front of the other.  Hats off to you my friend! :)

I can't believe what your doctor did to you regarding the chair - that is absolutely horrible!  I actually went through a company that does all the medicare/insurance paperwork and so forth for you.  They were great - actually made the appointment with my doctor for the face to face exam/evaluation while I was on the phone with them, faxed all the paperwork to my doctor before the appointment so it was waiting for me and then did any necessary follow-up with my doctor - I didn't have to do any of it!  I had my face to face exam on a Tuesday and by that Saturday, my chair was being delivered!  Of course, it definitely helped that my doctor was so quick in faxing back the paperwork after my exam - she also was great through the process.  She was actually very happy when I approached her about getting the chair - she thought it would definitely help me keep my independence that is so important to me.

My living alone is semi by choice - LOL.  I've been divorced for about 6 years and then was dating a man for a while - lived with him and his young son for a short time - but unfortunately, the romantic relationship didn't last.  We are still very good friends, though, and he lives only about 3 miles from me, so I do have someone close by in case I need them.  My parents also live only about 20 miles from me, so that's not too bad.  I know they would drop everything and come if I ever needed them, but I also hate to "bother" them.  I do kinda enjoy living by myself - especially when I'm having a really bad pain day - at least this way if I need to just kinda close myself off from everyone and everything, I can without feeling guilty.  

I also get very lonely for friendship and companionship.  I've never had the begging or stealing of pain meds with anyone, but I've quite often had the situation of people not understanding that I can no longer do everything I used to be able to do - and even if I am able to do SOMETHING, it takes an awful lot of energy to do so, and I usually end up suffering for days on end afterward.  I also don't like disappointing anyone or keeping anyone from doing things they enjoy, so quite often I find myself bowing out of activities because I either know I won't be able to do them, or worse yet, I'll get to the activity/location and THEN realize that I'm unable to do whatever it is and it will ruin someone else's time.  I"m hoping that with my new chair I'll finally be able to get out and do some of the things that I've been missing out on the past several years.

Please, never feel like you're blabbing to me - I love to chat and always enjoy hearing from friends - old and new.  I'll PM you my regular email address also, so feel free to send me a message there any time.

Take care of yourself and God Bless :)

Robyn

[geminigirl1963]

I don't really understand what your doctor is saying - when you have a joint replacement done, it does just that - replaces the damaged joint, so therefore gets rid of the arthritis.  I've had a shoulder replacement done due to severe arthritis and although I am having some trouble with that shoulder again, it is NOT due to the arthritis.

I also can sympathisize with anyone who has arthritis - or any chronic pain condition for that matter - I have several pain issues and honestly cannot remember what a day (or even an hour) without pain feels like.

I'm 47, so anyone that thinks that arthritis is strictly an "old person" disease, they are sadly mistaken!!  I've had the documented arthritis for many, many years already.  As I said, i've already had one shoulder replaced and have been told I need to have both of my knees, my right hip and both of my ankles done soon.

If I were you, I'd consider getting a second surgical opinion about the replacement.

God Bless you also :)

[kbe234]

yes i know. that is what i told my son, if i get a hip replacement, what ever material, i don't know--if it is a man made product how can arthritis affect that? i do have emphysema, high blood pressure, have had  heart surgery so i would think that would be the risk factors for me.  i have adjusted to pain meds so i would rather deal with my pain than risk having surgery. i can't or rather will not have surgery on my neck because there is a 50% chance that i will not be able to walk again and right now, even though i have some difficulity, i will tolerate and control the pain through meds and keep walking! i am 49 and yes arthritis can affect any age group. i really think it is because of the degenerative disease that i have. my bones are ate up with it. i had to have a hysterectomy at a young age, my mom and dad both had the  degenerative disease, unfortunately it got passed onto me. anyway, i deal with my pain daily and with the power of prayer and gods help i will make it one day at a time. thanks for getting back to me, it helps to know people really care. kb234

[geminigirl1963]

You sound a lot like me.  Severe arthritis runs on both sides of my family - both my parents have it (although not as bad as me actually) and both sets of grandparents had it.  My dad has had a very bad back for years - partly because of an accident he had while in the Army, but also partly due to arthritis and degenerative disc problems.  I think at least some of my arthritis is due to not only having to have a complete hysterectomy at a young age (age 34), but also from long term, often high dose, use of prednisone for my asthma and other health issues.

Obviously I'm not a doctor, but rather can only pass along my own experiences and information I've been provided.  Before I had my shoulder replacement done, I had asked my surgeon if this would get rid of the problem with my shoulder and his answer was yes, it would get rid of the arthritis - because the joint is replaced, there is no bone/joint there for the arthritis to chew up.  Like I said, too, though, although I am having more problems with that shoulder again, I've had xrays and scans done and it is NOT because of arthritis.  We're still trying to figure out exactly WHAT is causing the problems - my surgeon thinks I probably have a rotator cuff tear or possibly a slippage of the prosthetic, but the shoulder is 100% free of arthritis.

I know sometimes the surgeons are leary of doing the replacements on us "younger" patients because they can wear out over time, so the younger you have it done, the higher the chance is that you will have to have it redone within your lifetime.  That's one reason I'm TRYING to hold off as long as possible before having my knees done - althought that's getting harder and harder to put off each day.  My knees seem to be getting worse and worse by the minute, rather than by the day or year.  It's gotten so I avoid stairs at ALL costs - if I do have to navigate any stairs it is a very long, slow, PAINFUL process that totally exhausts me and leaves me in tears.  I've also had to "break down" and just recently got a power chair to help me get around and hopefully avoid falling (I've fallen several times in the past and since I live alone, it can be dangerous because I don't have the strength to get up by myself).  I always felt like if I ended up getting the chair, it would be like I was "giving up" or "giving in" to my pain and mobility limitations, but I've come to realize that by getting the chair, I haven't ADDED to my limitations or restrictions, I've actually OPENED UP more possibilitiies for me to be able to get around and get out and do more things with family and friends.

I read the note you left for me - thank you.  I totally agree how upsetting it is when you can't even do the simple things like going grocery shopping without suffering for hours or days afterward.  It can definitely be very frustrating.  Just know that youare NOT alone.

So glad to now have you as a friend.

[kbe234]

gosh we are alot alike! i had my complete hysterectomy at age 28, tumors all over the size of my dr's fist! i had a nervous break down shortly after--no harmones! boy talking about adjusting to that! very hard!  i lost both of my parents due to lung cancer, i miss them dearly! my mom had so many surgeries on her hands, she was one of the first ones to have an artificial joint replacement in her thumb. one of her hands she had like 5  surgeries and about 3 on the other, she also had the knee surgery, she had a cyst the size of a grapefruit behind one. my poor dad's back was like mine, poor thing would sit at the table in the mornings and have coffee all bent over and hurting. oh i know they hurt so bad and do you know my dad never took pain pills only bufferin, my poor mom took them i guess she like me had no choice. seems they were tougher than me. i think liberal society makes things so much more readilly available to us.  these days compared to back then.

i tried to get a chair for mobility, the company approved me--but listen to this crazy stuff--my primary care dr told them he only gives them to stroke patients!!!! isn't that the bomb??? i could probably get my pain management dr to approve one, i am disabled on disibility and have the handicap sticker from him. i just hate to go into all that red tape. i get so exhausted! i hate to leave my house. i only go out 2-3 times a month--to the dr, dr with my son and grocery shopping if i can--i usually give a list to my bo and he picks up what i need, thank god for him! i feel for you living alone-is it by choice? you can tell me none of my business, i will understand. well i love chatting with you, i get so lonely for female companionship. i have tried to have friends but most find out i have pain meds and they seem to start begging or stealing--so i am not getting cut off for any one or going to jail! i would rather just have long distance friends on the net--you know someone cares when they take the time to sit in pain and type messages to you. i'll stop blabbing on now and let you rest. good to hear from you and always glad to chat with you. god bless you and take care--kbe234--wanda

[geminigirl1963]

Oh my - you sure have been through a lot!  You must be a very strong person to have gone through all that you have and still be able to put one foot in front of the other.  Hats off to you my friend! :)

I can't believe what your doctor did to you regarding the chair - that is absolutely horrible!  I actually went through a company that does all the medicare/insurance paperwork and so forth for you.  They were great - actually made the appointment with my doctor for the face to face exam/evaluation while I was on the phone with them, faxed all the paperwork to my doctor before the appointment so it was waiting for me and then did any necessary follow-up with my doctor - I didn't have to do any of it!  I had my face to face exam on a Tuesday and by that Saturday, my chair was being delivered!  Of course, it definitely helped that my doctor was so quick in faxing back the paperwork after my exam - she also was great through the process.  She was actually very happy when I approached her about getting the chair - she thought it would definitely help me keep my independence that is so important to me.

My living alone is semi by choice - LOL.  I've been divorced for about 6 years and then was dating a man for a while - lived with him and his young son for a short time - but unfortunately, the romantic relationship didn't last.  We are still very good friends, though, and he lives only about 3 miles from me, so I do have someone close by in case I need them.  My parents also live only about 20 miles from me, so that's not too bad.  I know they would drop everything and come if I ever needed them, but I also hate to "bother" them.  I do kinda enjoy living by myself - especially when I'm having a really bad pain day - at least this way if I need to just kinda close myself off from everyone and everything, I can without feeling guilty.  

I also get very lonely for friendship and companionship.  I've never had the begging or stealing of pain meds with anyone, but I've quite often had the situation of people not understanding that I can no longer do everything I used to be able to do - and even if I am able to do SOMETHING, it takes an awful lot of energy to do so, and I usually end up suffering for days on end afterward.  I also don't like disappointing anyone or keeping anyone from doing things they enjoy, so quite often I find myself bowing out of activities because I either know I won't be able to do them, or worse yet, I'll get to the activity/location and THEN realize that I'm unable to do whatever it is and it will ruin someone else's time.  I"m hoping that with my new chair I'll finally be able to get out and do some of the things that I've been missing out on the past several years.

Please, never feel like you're blabbing to me - I love to chat and always enjoy hearing from friends - old and new.  I'll PM you my regular email address also, so feel free to send me a message there any time.

Take care of yourself and God Bless :)

Robyn