Help

My oldest daughter has some very hard to deal with issues at times and no one seems to know what is wrong with her. SHe is only four and many people say it just her age, but others like me who deal with her on a daily basis think it is more than that. She has amazing verbal skills, but at times she says things out of order. For instance the other day she said "mommy I am sorry", I asked why she replied "for doing things you told me to do" I have no idea why she says things like this. Another thing is that she seems to be far away. She has amazing blue eyes and one day while talking to her she couldn't remember her brothers or twin sisters names. What am I to do if no one will listen, or the ones that do think I am abusing her? Please help my four year old become all she can!

[shaz71]

Hi i don't really know she could be daydreaming and not listening properly when she isn't answering about her brother and sisters names, but go to your gp and ask for a referral to a peadiatrician why do you think people will think you are abusing her. I know it is hard that sometimes professionals make you feel like you are an overbearing mother but just say that normally a mothers intuition is right when you feel something isn't right it is always the case go with your instinct and stick to your guns, hopefully she will be seen and things sorted out for her. Is there anything else going on what about her behaviour? She is only young and if she is the oldest she may feel a little pushed out it could be this sometimes children regress when they feel a little pushed out but always best to get her checked out to be on the safe side. Good luck. Sharon x

[mtgoat911]

i knew very early that my son had some developmental delay, other people became aware of it when i put him in a mothers morning out program and he was unable to do certain task and stay focused
the bottom line is this, we know our kids better than anyone, i no longer try to convince anyone that my son has learning disibilities, even when he was put in special needs classes my mom was still in denile
i dont mind now, its not up to them, i am the one that makes the descions, what other people think of me or my child is really none of my bussiness, they just do not have enough information to form an opinion
maybe try one of those pre-k workbooks with her tommorow, see if she makes a connection, and if she doesnt start working with her on a daily basis, because if she is some what disconnected your job as mom/teacher needs to start as early as you can
let me know how the workbook goes
xo

[momof4beautifulkids]

Her behavior.... That is hard to describe. At times she is fun loving and does things like other kids, and then here comes a tantrum out of the blue. They get worse and worse until she gets what she wants and she will manipulate everyway possible. She is fully potty trained and one day at school she just decided to wet herself. She has also been in trouble and pooped on herself to get her way. They sent her to a behavior school and I had problems with the teachers there and so the started calling the hotline on me everyday that I was not feeding her. They would come to my house and there she would be eating. When it was meal time she would lap it up like she was a dog to get attention and only few people knew she was doing it for attention. She is very smart for her age not a whole lot of delays but behavior is the main issue.

[mtgoat911]

disipline seems to be her main problem at the moment, i use a christian manners book for young boys, it is for older students, goes over house hold chores; folding cloths, keeping your toys in place, sharing, helping others....etc.
you may start searching for tips on positive reinforcement, there came a time when my oldest would not share toys with his brother, and was becoming increasingly difficult to manage
i packed up ALL his toys, placed then under the house, each friday (if his behavior warrented a reward) i would allow him to pick one or two toys to keep in his room, eventually he earned every toy back, and now he know that there are consequences for everything he does, they can be rewarded or loose everything
it took me 2 days to get all the toys put up in large storage bins, i needed a friend to help me carry the boxes
bathroom habits have been an issue in the past, infact most families that deal with aspers go through bathroom problems, i decided to allow my children to make hygiene mistakes but when they were old enough to deal with them theirselves i stopped helping them, if they sopiled their pants they had to wash them and clean the bathroom,
we did have one exception to the rule, my aspie son cannot have a bm with other people around, the bathroom was located at the back of his classroom and gave little privacy, he did have accidents as a result of this, but when he would do this at home where he had several toilets to choose from, he was in charge of all personal hygiene

i had one question, what hotline is she calling and how did she get the number, when my children were 4 yhey did not have phone access