My grandchild is four years old and only pees in the potty for her nanny. When anyone else (including her parents) try to take her to the potty, she simply refuses to go. She holds it until she is sick or can't hold it any longer and goes in her panties. Even if she is sitting on the toilet and can't hold it any longer, she struggles to get up to go on the floor. If she is left alone or her parent hides their eyes or goes out of the room, she jumps up and pees on the floor. Even the nanny has to hold her a little and usually pushes on her tummy but no one else seems to succeed with that. She verbally acknowledges that she only goes for her nanny. She poops for no one and does that in her panties hiding. Her parents are with her on the weekends and evenings and at least one of them comes home during the day for a few hours every day. They are wonderful parents and they have sought professional help for months but with no success. They have also taken her to a specialist to make sure nothing is wrong physically. They are "extremely patient" but I can see that it is wearing on them. Can anyone help?
Do you think they could be paying it too much attention?
Some times when kids see they are gettin attention for behaviors- even if its negative- they will continue it.
Maybe they can try a positive approach and try not to make a big deal out of it. ( if they have not already)
Try The all popular praise/ reward system and only Positive reinforcement - negative reinforcement might only undo all your hard work, and could confuse the child as to why she is being punished- she may not know where or when to go.
I do not know this little girl so I may just be rambling. This approach worked for my twins, it may work for her.
I understand the frustration- my now 9 year old had problems when he was around 4 potty training- I just don't remember what changed. I think he just grew out of it, and we had to deal with it.
She will get it. I know it don't seem like it now, but it will happen for her and her parents. Tell them they are doing awesome and to stay strong;) that goes for you too nanny!
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