Violent 16 year old son with Aspergers

My son, whom we adopted when he was one, was early on diagnosed with ADD, but just last year he saw another specialist that changed that to Aspergers. That's a good thing, because it will get him some help from the state later in life that otherwise would not have been available. The problem is that he has turned into someone that I literally fear to be around much of the time. I hestitate to admit that I'm his father, and can't control him, but it has gotten to the point that at times I fear for life and limb. I continually keep bruises, bite marks, scratches, welts etc. on various parts of my body. He has literally had me down on the floor, or on the ground beating on me until he has given up, or has been pulled off. This behavior often comes about when I deny him something that he wants, but not always. Sometimes its just totally out of thin air, and unexpected. If I try to defend myself it only makes the situation worse, so generally I just let it continue, unless I'm able to escape completely. For some reason he does not get as violent with his mother, although it has happened to a lesser degree. I suspect that sooner or later he will injure me seriously, and then something will have to happen. Unless you count various sorts of clubs, and the kitchen knife he waved at me last week, he hasn't really threatened me with any real weapon, although it wouldn't surprise me.

I suppose we need to get help, but it really hurts to know you can't control your own child, and that despite all that I read, chances are it's my fault. So what can I do? There doesn't seem to be a lot of help out there for someone in my situation. If I bring in the police, odds are that I'll be the one going to jail, a place I'd rather avoid. There are boarding schools, but I can't afford them. Please, I'll listen to any suggestions.

He is on "Intuniv" and it does seem to help, at least early in the day.  

[jade315]

Thats a difficult one. First of all, you need to make sure his doctors are aware of these violent behaviors. I'm no doctor and not in the medical field, but my best friends son has Aspergers. Have you tried changing medications? Talk to your doctor first and foremost would be my advice. Because they may be able to modify his medications before this turns very ugly.

[jesusislord128]

I agree with the above post. We too have a 14 year old defiant Aspie. She has just started to have seizures, Neurology thinks its caused from the Abilify she is on. Once we took her off and started Tegertol, things have been okay

Matt from NE IOwa