Childrens Triggers that makes them violent in Autistic children

My son is almost five. He has been voilent twards me when I tell him it's time for bed, or we have to do something out of the ordanary. He is about to start going to his dad's on the weekends and I'm conserned that this change will result in a negative way. I know that his father loves him and will protect him but he is not around enough to understand his true needs. His father has never seen his violent out burst.

Should I for warn his dad or just let his dad experiance it himself?

[Majikat]

YES you need to warn him... I live with my sons father and he ha seen all the violence... (my son used to be vey violent when younger... gave me black eyes all the time) anyways i notice that my boyfriend is no where near as patient as i am and he gets very overwhelmed with the bad behaviour quite quickly which really annoys me a lot...

i would suggest you tell him how bad it gets so that he can expect the worse and maybe it wont be that bad...

Is your son really rigid about routine? is he verbal at all? i know a lot of parents underestimate their children with autism cause they do tend to understand pretty much anything i would think.... im pretty sure its theie out put thats really messed up... thats what i hear when i see autistic people talk about their disorder when they are verbal

My son is 5 as well almost 6 so if you need any advice with anything you are welcome to message me

[Shannongemmer]

His father comes around and all but he's never seen the out burst or the violent acts. I have called him several times in the past for help and he says well what can i do????? he wont listen to you then how will he listen to me.
So it's been a problem getting his dad to help me when our son gets out of control. I have for warned his dad that there are triggers that set him off. With that being said his dad lets our son do what he wants when he wants. This isn't a good idea. My son has a regular rutine and it can not change or he is confused and very aggatated. My son's father has another son who is two and lives with him and his girl friend. I'm just worred about if he has a violant out break that his dad and girl friend wont know what to do. I have to hold him down in my lap and hug him while I have his long sleeves tied together so he can't hit me. I don't know what else to do. I NEVER hit him because that does not make things better, its negative behavior to negative behavior. I try my best to reinforce positive and loving behavior. I'm at a loss on what to do with him. He does talk when he was three almost four he had less then a 10 word vocab. Now he talks much better but still hard to understand him at times. I have found that he repeats everything and I feel that he is only mimicing things that he hears instead of learning them. His ST says he's 2 years 8 Months on speach and understanding.

[Majikat]

ya him repeating you is called parroting... very normal with a lot of autistic kids.

see my boyfriend is like that with mine where he lets him do what he wants just to avoid the bad behaviour and tantrums which in turn has made my son not listen to him lol Karma

does he calm down when you hug him tight? maybe he craves pressure... when my son was really bad we did the brushing of his body with a very fine brush and joint compression's it helped him alot!!!!   its calledWilbarger brushing make sure that you get the proper brush to do it!
also when he was bad i found that it helped to have his own little area to relax in such as a little tent with a bean bag chair in it and some favourite things and then they know they have a place to go and calm down

you need to tell them exactly how you calm him down... the thing is i dont know if it will work with them... i find that my sons behaviour is different for everybody and certian things work differently