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Good behaviour in school,bad behaviour out .

I have a 9 yr old severely autistic son, and two other sons aged 7 and 10,who have austistic traits but have not been assessed yet. A behavioural therapist did pay home visits for two years and we tried award charts to try to improve my 7 and 10yr olds behaviour at home. They are well-behaved at school and are both doing well academically,but once they leave the school gate they are disrespectful don.t do as they are told ,really hate the word NO and throw massive tantrums.
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Frequently kids use all their self control and energy to make it through the school day.  Once released they can no longer keep it together and act out.  Try allowing them time(and place) to decompress with little or no demands other than they avoid rudeness or violence.  After dinner (alone if needed) have them  rejoin the common area and be expected to resume polite social behavior.
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Avatar universal
severely autistic kids don't understand the meaning of word stop or no. even of your other two children do
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