My grandson is 34 months old, and not talking (a few words here and there; not fluent conversational language). Until a few months ago, he simply babbled like a baby. Now, he seems to have his own "language" that he appears to think we all understand. Occasionally, out of the clear blue sky, he comes up with something. The last time I was there, I kept the kids (there are 4) all weekend. He kept calling me "mom". I consistently told him I'm "mamma". On Sun. morning, he took my hand, said "grandma", led me to his room, picked out a book, and climbed up in my lap for me to read. That's highly unusual for him. He's now making better eye contact, and at least when I've been there, not as destructive. Since he's been able, he's thrown everything, esp. shoes, and been a very destructive child. He never played with toys appropriately. Once, he took a carton of eggs out of the 'fridge and threw each egg in the floor. He wasn't the type of baby that could be held and rocked or cuddled to sleep when he was obviously exhausted. He wouldn't stay in mom or dad's lap any length of time. He hears fine; obeys (or not, when he chooses) when told to do/not do something. He has 3 siblings, but doesn't actually play with them; one is only 17 mo. older than him. When I was helping the kids dye Easter eggs, I tried to get him interested, but he just went off by himself. At Christmas, I bought all the kids a stuffed animal that made music and danced. His was Santa. When we gave it to him, before installing batteries, he "loved on" Santa, and actually said "Santa". When we turned Santa on, with music and dancing, he threw the toy as hard as he could and got really upset. We took Santa's batteries out and tried to re-introduce him, but grandson would have nothing to do with Santa again. He also has had, since about 18 mo., the flapping of hands when he gets upset or excited. I talked to son/daughter-in-law a few months ago about having grandson tested for autism spectrum disorder. Son became defensive; pediatrician says grandson has met all milestones (didn't walk until he was 2), and there's nothing wrong with grandson. Grandson is youngest of 4 children; am sure mom and dad know he's "different". Mamma is quite concerned. If grandson has ASD (or other developmental delay) he needs help sooner than later. Any suggestions as to what mamma can do now to get grandson tested?
She could call early intervention just about all states have it. She could also tell her pediatrition her concerns and ask him to set her up with an evaluator. I talked to a pediatrition here recently who said that the flapping of the hands is common in children under 4. They are really just worried about how much they do it. Is it all the time? The fact that he does talk is really encouraging. Even if its only now and then. Does he repeat what you say back to you? Any phrases that he repeats over and over? I would suggest therapy. Even with "normal" kids it could be a good thing. Its one on one time just for them. That could just be the way he is, its really hard to diagnose a child on the spectrum if its not obvious that something is wrong. For instance, you and the mother know he is different. Do strangers know? Is it that obvious? If not than your therapist will have to spend some time with him before diagnosing him. Good luck. I know how you feel. I am in the same shoes myself. My daughter is 24 months with a speech delay and some a typical tendencies. However, like your grandson, she does talk when she wants to. I know what its like to worry and nothing will make it go away. Sometimes you just need to get them a little help to push them along.
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