Social problems

I'm an adult with autism (PDD-NOS), and I am often nervous entering social situations without my parents.  I really want to be able to work, but I don't know how to get past this anxiety.

[Reb38]

Hi. Can you check on programs(social services) in your state or city? I am a job coach and mentor, most states have these programs that will help you. Also, check with agencies, like therapeutic, often they have programs. In our town, we specifically have a Vocational facility and adult homes. Good luck.

[halbashes]

Thank you for your response.  Actually, I've already started the job search process with my local vocational facility.  I'm just very nervous about it.  I've never had a job before...

[MJIthewriter]

Welcome to the club. :)  Yes I'm in a similar situation. I found in or local independent living center they hold various meetings and social activities. I participate in the ones that interest me. Another nice thing is this is a group of people with special needs. I've found as a general rule these kind of people are more tolerant and friendly than those who have never known or met people with different abilities.

"Differently abled"

I'm working with DRS and am going to be doing a work study thing starting tomarrow. That shall be interesting.

[halbashes]

Good luck with the work study.  Do you have similar nervousness to me?

[MJIthewriter]

It's more like a "clueless" feeling... I may have an idea what I want but not know what to do to get what I want.

Or I may want things but I don't know how to get them. For instance I want a scanner to use for my artwork. To get it means having to go to a place I haven't been... I need to find a Best Buy or related company and find someone willing to take me there. If there's no one to take me there, then I am stuck feeling frustrated I can't obtain the object I want... A CD RW drive is on my wishlist...  I tried to save up money for the items, but it may be slipping away because grandma does most of my shopping for food and basic items...

To think about just going on my own is like hitting a brick wall. I just can't do it!  I want to do it, but something blocks me... I think I'm going to get lost, daze off when I'm supposed to pull the trigger (bus: "stop requested"), or not recognize the stop, just by looking at a map...(miss spoting the bus sign)  If I haven't seen the place before then I don't know where to look to find the relevant shop. I fear I may miss it because I'm looking in the wrong area or not able to spot it amongst all the other things in the "scenery".  If there are a lot of shops clustered, it takes me extra time to read each sign and mentally draw a line down to the shop below.  I fear I'll miss the destination by the time I spot the place.

Same thing with visiting my parents 300+ miles away. My parents wish I could just take the bus... I'm afraid I'll miss the transfer point, either by not visually recognizing the location or by spacing off... That's one of my biggest fears is to not recognize the stopping point/ transfer location or space off and find myself going the wrong way, and not notice this until way too late...

It helps when people go with me to catch me if I am spacing off at the time I should be paying attention. By spacing off I mean either being absorbed in thought. (I can't think and take in outside information at the same time...)  I can do one or the other...think or observe...not both at the same time...  Or I may simpily be looking in the wrong area. When people point, that seems to be very common...  I'm looking at where they are pointing from my perspective, not theirs... With practice I get better and can go on my own for short trips.

It's mostly going places that brings the worst... Knowing what I want, no problem...

I don't know if such example translates to nervousness, frustration or both...  

(Note to self: I think this has been the best I've described my transportation hang-up to date so far.)

[halbashes]

I can definitely relate to the "clueless" feeling...  That is the root to my nervousness regarding work.  I have these predefined scripts in my head, and when they work I am quite content.  If the conversation doesn't go as planned though...  Well, the "clueless" feeling kicks in.

Like you, I also get lost very easily too.  I also have poor facial recognition.  What if I cannot recognize my boss?  What if I cannot find the bathroom?  It's like grade school all over again...

I also have several other unpredictable medical problems outside of autism that could make working difficult, but hopefully not impossible.